Avoiding priests and religious

  • Thread starter Thread starter LittleFlower
  • Start date Start date
Status
Not open for further replies.
Roseeurekacross said:
This isnt a movie plot, its an era little flower and I are living. And people in Ireland
Click to expand...
I live in Ireland. I have also lived in a religious community that was directly affected by a criminal priest.

Nobody is downgrading how bad these things are but at the same time it makes little sense to avoid priests and religious, or avoid the sacraments because of these things. Maybe the older generation have more emotions about this because it was happening at this time. However my generation is not interested in wallowing in guilt for the crimes of a few priests that mostly occured before we were born.

It doesn’t help the Church and it doesn’t help the victims either.
 
I’m so tired of that slander where celibacy = sex abuser.
It’s anti-science and insulting, that’s bad enough but it also allows plenty of other sex abusers to get away with their crimes and allow more victimisation.
 
Last edited:
The thing is, it happened in our Parishes, in our churches, our schools, it was our clergy, our laity, our religious. And what they did and to whom is public knowledge,
It did not happen somewhere else. It happened in an institution run by the same order, where I worked. The places it happened are still there, the rooms. It happened in the same religious spaces we frequent., the churches, the Presbyteries

The place some of these priests were ordained are where we attend Mass.

Yes the media misrepresents and is very anti catholic in this issue. But we all need the knowledge of what happened so it never does happen again.

I love my clergy. I dont envy their pastoral and public roles at this time.
Pray for us
 
Last edited:
AdamP88 said:
However my generation is not interested in wallowing in guilt for the crimes of a few priests that mostly occured before we were born.
Click to expand...
I am your generation, and I am not “wallowing in guilt”. I am not doing any value judgement on your reaction to the whole thing but you are more than happy to judge others and their reaction. Funny that?
 
LittleFlower said:
I am your generation, and I am not “wallowing in guilt”. I am not doing any value judgement on your reaction to the whole thing but you are more than happy to judge others and their reaction. Funny that?
Click to expand...
Your reaction is more like the way an actual victim of abuse would react. If you told me you were a victim then I’d say it’s a reasonable reaction. Most people can be disgusted by this but still manage to realise that most priests and religious are not involved.

As for coping mechanisms…I’d say force yourself to approach and talk with the priests in your parish and realise that they are likely equally as disgusted as you, if not more so.

When I spent a year in a religious community the ones most eager to give those who offended the boot were the other priests.
 
The purpose of this thread was to ask for coping strategies and insights.

And some have experience similar emotions. Read the whole thread, and that would become clear. Some posters have offered strategies and thoughtful suggestions.

Please feel free to create a new thread if you want to discuss prevention of abuse. 🙂
 
Like I have been saying, that would be the next step.

Currently I am not there yet.
 
Thanks I am good with it. The pastoral care of my Bishop and Clergy is second to none. Our Bishop discusses everything with us, and issues newsletters as needed so we know where things are at. My vicar general has his media appearances very thoughtful and considered and caring. I am in a 7 percenter Parish. Little flower has a lot of supports to access , when she feels ready.
But it helps her to know that many feel the same way, many have left the Church because of this, many just dont know how to react.
 
Last edited:
Sorry OP. For what it’s worth, I also think people have been harsh on you. But, I’ve seen a lot of those same folks snap at other OPs in other threads.

Don’t take it personally. I have a feeling that people have become jaded from seeing so many people come on CAF over the years to validate their thoughts or other less than wholesome reasons. It is easy to make assumptions. When someone gets to that point, they really need to take a break from the forum. Or internet in general.
 
It is a matter of time. Our confessionals were removed due to the abusive priests and what occurred in them. People are coming to confession again at their own pace.
 
Last edited:
Yes, I was in Nursing School at Iowa (Where I did earn my BSN in Nursing) and the the consensus was that pedophilia could be cured with counseling which involved in most cases exposing abusers to kiddie porn and putting electrodes on their penis to determine if after counseling if they had been “cured.” If they obtained an erection they were not cured and if the did not they were considered “cured.” Sorry for the graphic response but that is how it was done at the U of I at the time in the 80’s,

With the recidivism rate later so high among those so called “cured” pedophiles the consensus changed that pedophilia was not curable or near impossible to cure.

Many don’t think of that, so some of these priests had been sent to counseling/treatment and deemed “cured.”

Sad, but true. My heart is, and has been broken over the sexual abuse among priesst and the cover up of the abuse by those in higher authority. I almost left the Catholic Church over the horror of it all and joined a confessional Lutheran Church (LCMS.)

Why I stayed was because I came to realize that the Eucharist was something I simply could not give up in the Catholic Church and came to believe, and now believe 100 percent that the Catholic Church is the true Church that Jesus founded.

It was a two year journey back while I attended both Churches Lutheran and Catholic and refrained from Communing at both Churches during that time.

I’m glad to be back now for 7 years. That’s my personal story if it helps anyone.
 
Last edited:
Thank you for this. 🌷 I thought I was losing my marbles. 😮

What many people don’t realise is that the forum ranks quite high in search results, and what is written here not only impacts those who are members. Some of what is written here would be very hurtful for other members of the public, and the Church community to read.

Again, thank you for your kind words. :raising_hand_woman:t2:
 
Its so current that i sit in mass with survivors, and a couple of families whose grown kids suicided.

You cant just get over it. We need prayer, love, compassion, validation for all affected and all responsible for our Pastoral care.
 
Last edited:
MaryT777 said:
That’s my personal story if it helps anyone.
Click to expand...
Thanks so much for sharing your story and experience. 🌷 I am so happy you were able to work through it, and I hope to do the same.

It’s important to share these stories, and feelings so that people who feel the same way don’t feel alone.
 
We did not just have 1 criminal priest. As I posted earlier, 1 school here only had one staff member NOT abusing children.
One criminal Priest is one too many

I wrote of Ireland in response to eire’s post and that person’s experience.

Compassion is the key. Compassion and empathy for everyone.

This is not isolated incidents before anyone was born, here. This ended in 2009. How old are you?
 
Last edited:
Please remain on topic. The topic is about coping with the fallout of the sexual abuse crises in the Catholic Church. Feel free to create a new topic.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Back
Top