Avoiding spiritual despair

[theCardinalbird]

What are the best ways to avoid spiritual despair from Mortal sins?

 

[StephieNorthCo]

Confession?

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

Seek professional help for your issues. You are dealing with things on your own that you don’t need to be.

 

[StephieNorthCo]

Xanthippe brings up a really good point. Getting assistance, be it from your priest, a professional, a really trusted (I mean TRUSTED) friend is way better than trying to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders by yourself.

 

[theCardinalbird]

Seek professional help for your issues.

One issue is a sin that most people (like teenagers) fall to (it starts with an M) I’m just asking if anyone knows how to avoid despairing

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

Xanthippe_Voorhees:

Seek professional help for your issues.

One issue is a sin that most people (like teenagers) fall to (it starts with an M) I’m just asking if anyone knows how to avoid despairing

Joe

Regardless of how common the sin is the issue is how you are mentally handling it. It’s not that it’s not a big deal it’s more about how you are left feeling and how you cope.

 

[Kei]

Speak with your pastor about it, face to face.

I am not trained in spiritual direction but even so, if you want some advice that I can give I can say some words of consolation.

 

[theCardinalbird]

how you are left feeling and how you cope.

And that is the problem

 

[pianistclare]

Joe, you just said “most teenagers struggle with this”.
So why despair?
It’s normal on some level, but it’s paramount that you overcome it so that it doesn’t overcome your soul and also you don’t develop scruples. Add in your trouble with your twin, and you’ve got a recipe for disaster, These are the carefree years of your life!
Get counseling and be joyful. Repair your relationship with your brother. Someday, ti will be just the two of you. Think how awful it will be that you are not close, enjoying each other’s company and families. THINK, think ahead, repair NOW.
Many are praying for you!

ETA: A legalistic approach is good in theory…in real life? Not helpful. You’re a teen. Get close to your parents, a trusted advisor, your priest confessor.

 

[theCardinalbird]

Joe, you just said “most teenagers struggle with this”.

It’s masturbation

So why despair?

I don’t know why I feel like despairing. Could it be because I feel God doesn’t want me because I keep sinning against his will

It’s normal on some level, but it’s paramount that you overcome it so that it doesn’t overcome your soul and also you don’t develop scruples.

Unfortunately I am scrupulous.

You’re a teen. Get close to your parents, a trusted advisor, your priest confessor

My parents don’t understand me carrying this cross. They would want me to act on it if they knew I suffer a bit. I need a spiritual director. I just haven’t had time for one

 

[pianistclare]

You go to a Catholic school. There is no chaplain? I know you are speaking masturbation. THat’s the point. I’l wager every boy there has the same problem.
God doesn’t treat us like that.
You should know this.
Your parents understand more than you think.
You’re their son.

 

[FollowChrist34]

And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more.”

 

[guanophore]

One issue is a sin that most people (like teenagers) fall to (it starts with an M) I’m just asking if anyone knows how to avoid despairing

One must replace despair with hope, and those things that build hope. One does not banish darkness by wishing it gone, one turns on the LIGHT. For this reason investing oneself in listening, reading, and memorizing scripture is an excellent remedy. Each despairing thought should be replaced by the Word of God. This is because the devil will be vanquished by Scripture, and it is the devil who is using the accusations of the mind to bring about despair.

We are saved by grace, through faith, not by our own works.

 

[theCardinalbird]

You go to a Catholic school. There is no chaplain

There is, but I haven’t asked him anything because it is hard to find him and I don’t have time during the day

God doesn’t treat us like that.

You should know this.

I guess I should, I just keep feeling that everytime I choose to sin, I leave God who I should always follow, yet I sin in his face. Would God still want me?

Your parents understand more than you think.

You’re their son.

Even so, they don’t behave Catholic, they would probably react in a bad way if I told them

 

[pianistclare]

One cannot GUESS how people will react.
The CHaplain is an email away.
If you can be one here daily, you can contact him.
He, of all people, is the one who has heard all this before and can help you,PLus, he probably knows your brother.
Do you want to get better? Of course you do.
Get on it.

 

[theCardinalbird]

Ok

(16 characters)

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

There is, but I haven’t asked him anything because it is hard to find him and I don’t have time during the day

Joe, I know you are only 16 so I’m going to try to be kind in the way I relate this to you.

Person A- “I did something stupid…I tried to reach the quarter under the vending machine and I’m bleeding!!!”
Person B- “You need to see the nurse”
A- “I can’t see the nurse, I’m too busy!!!”
B- “But you’re bleeding!”
A- “No one is going to understand!”
B- “but most teenagers do stupid things…why wouldn’t they?”
A- “because I’m way more stupid even if every other kid in school tried to get that quarter I’m sooooo much worse”
B- “You need to see a nurse”
A- “I can’t! I just can’t!”
B- “SEEE THE NURSE!”

Point is Joe, you’re making every excuse for yourself. Next time you’re in homeroom tell your teacher you need a pass to see the Chaplin. MAKE time. Everyone is busy. Everyone does things that people in their peer group do. The only ridiculous part of this is that you keep putting up every barrier possible to getting real help.

 

[PetraG]

Seek professional help for your issues. You are dealing with things on your own that you don’t need to be.

It may be enough or perhaps more effective to ask one’s confessor about this during confession. People who don’t believe their therapist when their therapist tells them to stop worrying about their eternal situation will often find it easier to believe a physician of the soul. A priest may remind them that while emotions are not moral choices that a person does have the duty to avoid choosing despair as a mental action. It can feel better to know that courageously trampling Despair under the Cross is a virtuous action. that gives proper reverence and faith to the Pascal Mystery.

 

[Xanthippe_Voorhees]

Xanthippe_Voorhees:

Seek professional help for your issues. You are dealing with things on your own that you don’t need to be.

It may be enough or perhaps more effective to ask one’s confessor about this during confession. People who don’t believe their therapist when their therapist tells them to stop worrying about their eternal situation will often find it easier to believe a physician of the soul.

I didn’t say he must seek a therapist, I said professional help. A priest is a professional. A Chaplin is a professional. However, given the numerous other issues that this poster has brought to the attention of CAF a team of spiritual and psycological advisors is more than called for. What will only stand to harm is to run circles around the issue.

 

[PetraG]

Sorry. When people say “get professional help,” they don’t usually mean “go to confession.” My mistake.