Babying Moms VS Ambitious Dads

[Lost_Wanderer]

I don’t know about most people here but I’ve become a fan of some of the recent Old Spice ads featuring sad moms. (I don’t want to post them here because they might be inappropriate). When I first saw them, I wondered when they were gonna put ads featuring dads.

Lo and behold, they did and I’m sorry if I actually predicted that the dads were gonna have a completely contrasting attitude to the moms.

No offense to all moms, including my own, but I grew up with the kind that couldn’t help babying me. In contrast, my Dad was the sort that celebrated every single moment that I manage to do stuff on my own (whether it was just riding home, graduating, or getting a job).

There are a lot of parent stereotypes out there but I feel like the one that really rang true to my experience was the one being in featured in Old Spice. Sure it can come off as extremely sexist but that’s really how I grew up.

On the one hand was a doting mom who’s sad now that she can’t put her son’s head on his shoulders for him. On the other, a relieved father who’s singing praises to God that he’s got one less mouth to feed out of his own pocket.

Any other guys around here who’s had similar experience? Have you had moments where you felt like you did your old man proud but then saw your mom cry a little inside because you’re not her little boy anymore?

 

[Xantippe]

I don’t know about most people here but I’ve become a fan of some of the recent Old Spice ads featuring sad moms. (I don’t want to post them here because they might be inappropriate). When I first saw them, I wondered when they were gonna put ads featuring dads.

Lo and behold, they did and I’m sorry if I actually predicted that the dads were gonna have a completely contrasting attitude to the moms.

No offense to all moms, including my own, but I grew up with the kind that couldn’t help babying me. In contrast, my Dad was the sort that celebrated every single moment that I manage to do stuff on my own (whether it was just riding home, graduating, or getting a job).

There are a lot of parent stereotypes out there but I feel like the one that really rang true to my experience was the one being in featured in Old Spice. Sure it can come off as extremely sexist but that’s really how I grew up.

On the one hand was a doting mom who’s sad now that she can’t put her son’s head on his shoulders for him. On the other, a relieved father who’s singing praises to God that he’s got one less mouth to feed out of his own pocket.

Any other guys around here who’s had similar experience? Have you had moments where you felt like you did your old man proud but then saw your mom cry a little inside because you’re not her little boy anymore?

We actually have the reverse scenario at our house, but I think that’s probably because of cultural differences.

My husband is “ethnic” and emotionally expressive, whereas I’m from a WASP background, where the 11th Commandment is “Thou Shalt Not Complain” and my natural reaction to a lot of things is “Suck it up, buttercup.” (I don’t actually say that, but I’m thinking it.) So, my husband is the more sentimental parent.

 

[Lost_Wanderer]

We actually have the reverse scenario at our house, but I think that’s probably because of cultural differences.

My husband is “ethnic” and emotionally expressive, whereas I’m from a WASP background, where the 11th Commandment is “Thou Shalt Not Complain” and my natural reaction to a lot of things is “Suck it up, buttercup.” (I don’t actually say that, but I’m thinking it.) So, my husband is the more sentimental parent.

I think this phenom is more likely to happen in generations that have more ‘traditional’ full-time moms and a lot of cultures, even non-Christian ones, are structured for this sort of position.

My mother obviously grew into the role and I know other guys with the same. It’s said that mothers like that are the ones most predisposed to Empty Nest Syndrome (the sort of thing that Old Spice has been making fun of these days).

I know that for some it can be a serious issue of parental attachment. But as a twenty-something young man who likes being on the other side of puberty, the ad was a surprise relief. My mother’s the sort who’d get a little uncomfortable when you point out her ENS tendencies. Every time I do some cooking on my own, she’s never without the slightest misgiving. (“Don’t use too much oil!”, “You sure you’ve got enough eggs?”, “That looks unhealthy!”)

My Dad though? He more or less jumped at the chance to show me how to work the BBQ and made no effort to hide his intention of appointing me his ‘successor.’ (Of course, as a carnivore, you won’t see me complain. ) He’s even like this when it comes to managing my sister! (“Here, take the keys to the house. Just don’t wake me when you bring her home. I go to sleep nao.”)

 

[Xantippe]

I think this phenom is more likely to happen in generations that have more ‘traditional’ full-time moms and a lot of cultures, even non-Christian ones, are structured for this sort of position.

I’m a SAHM (for the moment).

My mother obviously grew into the role and I know other guys with the same. It’s said that mothers like that are the ones most predisposed to Empty Nest Syndrome (the sort of thing that Old Spice has been making fun of these days).

I know that for some it can be a serious issue of parental attachment. But as a twenty-something young man who likes being on the other side of puberty, the ad was a surprise relief. My mother’s the sort who’d get a little uncomfortable when you point out her ENS tendencies. Every time I do some cooking on my own, she’s never without the slightest misgiving. (“Don’t use too much oil!”, “You sure you’ve got enough eggs?”, “That looks unhealthy!”)

**Last time I visited, my mom was telling me how long to cut the celery sticks.

It was apparently really important to get them exactly right.

I’ve previously on CAF coined the term “momsplaining” for when your mom tells you exactly how to do something you’ve been doing for the last 20+ years.
**

My Dad though? He more or less jumped at the chance to show me how to work the BBQ and made no effort to hide his intention of appointing me his ‘successor.’ (Of course, as a carnivore, you won’t see me complain. ) He’s even like this when it comes to managing my sister! (“Here, take the keys to the house. Just don’t wake me when you bring her home. I go to sleep nao.”)

 

[MaryT777]

I love the word “momsplaining.” After making what seems to be 100,000 grilled cheeses in my life, I was at my mom’s and she said “Don’t forget we LIGHTLY brown our grilled cheese.” I thought I’d die laughing. Wanted to serve a burnt one for a joke but I don’t waste food.

Mary.

 

[EasterJoy]

I find the mothers in the Old Spice ads somewhere between pathetic and disturbing, depending on the mother and how much she comes off as a stalker. Then there are the dads who a) can’t wait to get rid of the kid and b) pin their hopes on the new girlfriend to inject some motivation to work into that slacker that their wife is always fawning over. Yes, if you had parents like that and Old Spice promised to be the way out of their basement, yes, I think that might sell a lot of deodorant. Of course, I grew up around traditional farm mothers, and having babied sons or daughters was not some ideal. That’s some kind of city boy thing, like dogs that have a wardrobe and cats who enjoy the luxury of being particular about what they will and won’t eat. (If rural cats don’t like what you’re serving, they’ll go and catch something.)

By the way–it is a *deodorant *ad. Is there a mother who has a sentimental attachment to the way her son started *smelling *in about 6th or 7th grade? Maybe he’s not a man, but wow, you wouldn’t know from the smell, because when he gets into the car after PE, he smells like about five hairy men who have been trapped on the same German U-boat together for six months. I know of mothers who intend to pull the carpets in their sons’ bedrooms when they graduate from high school, because they don’t think the smell will ever come out.

BTW, Old Spice Pure Sport High Endurance does do a number on that smell. Very good product, LOL! (That, Zorb-x., and Biz. Gotta have Biz for those microfiber gym clothes.)

 

[Lost_Wanderer]

Of course, I grew up around traditional farm mothers, and having babied sons or daughters was not some ideal. That’s some kind of city boy thing, like dogs that have a wardrobe and cats who enjoy the luxury of being particular about what they will and won’t eat. (If rural cats don’t like what you’re serving, they’ll go and catch something.)

I’d refine it by extending it to suburban-style families too. Granted, I’m grateful for my parents work of providing for the four of us. There were plenty times though when we couldn’t help notice the sharp ENS tendencies of our own mother.

In the Dadsong ad, my favorite line was: “Now there’s a chance he’ll be employed!”

Even in the ad’s extreme portrayals, I can’t help sympathize with (if not praise) the overly eager fathers more than the mothers. As much as my own Pop was really pushy about it, I don’t blame him for wanting to see us less inside the house. Ultimately, I too like the idea where I take less out of his own bank account and more out of mine. Heck, son or daughter, I’ve met others who long for that day.

I love the word “momsplaining.” After making what seems to be 100,000 grilled cheeses in my life, I was at my mom’s and she said “Don’t forget we LIGHTLY brown our grilled cheese.” I thought I’d die laughing. Wanted to serve a burnt one for a joke but I don’t waste food.

Personally, I like how it equalizes both ‘parties.’ It’s usually the point in your life when you realize either: A) Mother’s wisdom or B) You know better than your mother.

It’s pretty much win-win in the end.

 

[EasterJoy]

I’d refine it by extending it to suburban-style families too. Granted, I’m grateful for my parents work of providing for the four of us. There were plenty times though when we couldn’t help notice the sharp ENS tendencies of our own mother.

In the Dadsong ad, my favorite line was: “Now there’s a chance he’ll be employed!”

Even in the ad’s extreme portrayals, I can’t help sympathize with (if not praise) the overly eager fathers more than the mothers. As much as my own Pop was really pushy about it, I don’t blame him for wanting to see us less inside the house. Ultimately, I too like the idea where I take less out of his own bank account and more out of mine. Heck, son or daughter, I’ve met others who long for that day.

Let’s just say the fathers have far healthier attitudes towards their sons than the mothers do. I say this from the standpoint of what a 50 year old man would want his parents to have wanted for him. If you love your son, you want him to become a man. I saw my sons as men on the hoof before they were 6 pounders. As I told them when they were ten, “Such and so is the way men act. You aren’t men yet, but you won’t learn to act like one in a day. You may as well get started now. Better to be a boy who has started to act like a man than a man who still acts as if he were a boy.” A boy wants his mother to want that for him and to see him in that way, I’ve always thought, provided he isn’t pressured to be far more mature than his years.