Bad Priests For Confession

[Te_Deum]

Well Brother, I didn’t really take the Religious into consideration in my post, as I was envisioning parish priests when I wrote it. I should have made the distinction. Everything you say if very true and fair for Religious… however I maintain that a secular priest should hear a confession at the drop of a hat unless he’s offering the Holy Sacrifice. Even if it’s just for Miss Betsy to confess that she called so-and-so a busy-body yesterday. Now, he should be willing to do so, but Miss Betsy shouldn’t be asking for it in such a situation (unless of course her argument with so-and-so is developed into hate and other spiritual illness etc.). But the priest should always be willing to hear it.

The grace conferred in the Sacrament of Penance should never be underestimated (not that I am saying you are doing so).

 

[ATeutonicKnight]

Within the last 18 months I’ve had a couple of minor uncomfortable experiences, both of them with the same priest. (I suppose you could say that I should’ve learned something from the first one!) The first one, I’d been going through a spell of depression, was feeling very low and, to be blunt, I confessed that I’d been having suicidal thoughts. The priest didn’t bat an eyelid and just said “God bless your good intentions, say X as your penance and make a good act of contrition.” Yes, he did his job and most people would probably say that’s all he’s there to do. But at the time it seemed a bit too minimalist a reaction to someone who may have been having problems.

The second time, the priest misunderstood something I said in confession. When I tried to clear up the misunderstanding, he got annoyed and responded loudly, making reference to the sins I was confessing - loudly enough that I was seriously concerned his comments could be concerned by the people who were waiting in the line outside the confessional. And I got one or two “looks” as I was leaving.

That had to be really embarrassing. I think both of us spoke a little loudly in the confessional as well when I went yesterday, so I’m glad we were the only ones in the Church.

But I do know the feeling of getting looks while leaving the confessional. I remember one time in Saint Joseph Missouri I went to confession, confessed some grave sins, and then left to the pew. As I left my parents were in the line and they were giving me looks. Later I asked my sister if she was able to hear me and she said no, but my parents gave her looks as well. Weird, aye?

 

[jmcrae]

Has anyone ever known a Priest that was bad at doing confessions? I had the worst confession of my life today (Where I believe I may have committed sacrilege). Never before have I really had this problem, but in the environment I was in, it was uncomfortable, awkward, and simply weird. I’m not blaming my cowardice on the Priest, but it probably never would have happened if it was a Priest that was better at it. Has anyone ever been to a Priest that made you feel uncomfortable and awkward?

If it was the first Mass of Sunday, keep in mind that the priest has been fasting since the time of his evening meal yesterday - he may have been annoyed because he was hungry and had thought that he would be eating his breakfast by that time - and he probably also wanted to finish his breakfast in time to do the one hour fast before the next Mass that he has to say.

I think it’s true of both men and women, that when it comes to having to miss a meal unexpectedly, especially after fasting for some period of time, it can cause one to be a little short and impatient - more so than usual. This is a natural human reaction.

While I wouldn’t say, never try to go to Confession outside of the scheduled times, I would say, think about his situation - what has he been doing, and what does he need to do next? Is this a good time for him? Is he just hanging around looking for something to do, or is he in a hurry to get to his next thing?

 

[ATeutonicKnight]

If it was the first Mass of Sunday, keep in mind that the priest has been fasting since the time of his evening meal yesterday - he may have been annoyed because he was hungry and had thought that he would be eating his breakfast by that time - and he probably also wanted to finish his breakfast in time to do the one hour fast before the next Mass that he has to say.

I think it’s true of both men and women, that when it comes to having to miss a meal unexpectedly, especially after fasting for some period of time, it can cause one to be a little short and impatient - more so than usual. This is a natural human reaction.

While I wouldn’t say, never try to go to Confession outside of the scheduled times, I would say, think about his situation - what has he been doing, and what does he need to do next? Is this a good time for him? Is he just hanging around looking for something to do, or is he in a hurry to get to his next thing?

It was yesterday, actually. And as far as I know Priests don’t have much to do after Mass on Saturdays (If they do please don’t kill me for ignorance. I love Priests and want to be one. ). I think he was simply annoyed because I have asked him once before (In which he was perfectly calm, despite it being a Sunday morning), and he was not only annoyed that I asked him again, but he was annoyed at the fact that it was Saturday and he holds confessions on Saturdays. The reason I didn’t go then is because, although I tried very hard, I didn’t make it. The town is twenty-five miles away, and I tried to convince my parents to leave earlier than they did, but it was no use. I just wish I lived in a town that had confessions so I could walk to it when I needed. However, unfortunately my town believes confessions aren’t necessary, and they only have it once a year.

 

[JReducation]

Well Brother, I didn’t really take the Religious into consideration in my post, as I was envisioning parish priests when I wrote it. I should have made the distinction. Everything you say if very true and fair for Religious… however I maintain that a secular priest should hear a confession at the drop of a hat unless he’s offering the Holy Sacrifice. Even if it’s just for Miss Betsy to confess that she called so-and-so a busy-body yesterday. Now, he should be willing to do so, but Miss Betsy shouldn’t be asking for it in such a situation (unless of course her argument with so-and-so is developed into hate and other spiritual illness etc.). But the priest should always be willing to hear it.

The grace conferred in the Sacrament of Penance should never be underestimated (not that I am saying you are doing so).

The only reason that I mentioned religious is because many religious do run parishes.

It’s funny, because it does not seem like it, but there are. On Friday, I was at a Respect Life Function for parishes in our diocese. The number of regular priests was greater than the secular priests. It is also true, that they run less parishes, despite the larger numbers, because they live in communities at these parishes. The secular priests live in rectories with one or two. There was one parish run by Discalced Carmelite Friars. They have 10 friars. Four are priests and all of them work in the parish. They follow a very strict schedule. They’re available only 4 hours a day. This drives the diocesan priests crazy, because they’re expected to be available 8 hours a day and sometimes more.

At the local parish, up the street from our house, we have Trinitarian Friars. They spend more time together than with the parishioners. It’s their custom. The people love them. They have an hour of confession on Saturdays and always have two friars to hear confessions, because the lines are long. However, when the clock strikes, they leave to go back to the monastery for the community functions, even if there are people on the line. They apologize and leave.

If you go to the office when a friar-priest is available, they will hear your confession or by appointment.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[JReducation]

It was yesterday, actually. And as far as I know Priests don’t have much to do after Mass on Saturdays (If they do please don’t kill me for ignorance. I love Priests and want to be one. ). I think he was simply annoyed because I have asked him once before (In which he was perfectly calm, despite it being a Sunday morning), and he was not only annoyed that I asked him again, but he was annoyed at the fact that it was Saturday and he holds confessions on Saturdays. The reason I didn’t go then is because, although I tried very hard, I didn’t make it. The town is twenty-five miles away, and I tried to convince my parents to leave earlier than they did, but it was no use. I just wish I lived in a town that had confessions so I could walk to it when I needed. However, unfortunately my town believes confessions aren’t necessary, and they only have it once a year.

If they don’t have a regular confession schedule, you can call the office for an appointment to go to confession. The priest has to give you one. He just doesn’t have to give it to you right now, if he’s already committed. It may be for later in the day.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[ATeutonicKnight]

If they don’t have a regular confession schedule, you can call the office for an appointment to go to confession. The priest has to give you one. He just doesn’t have to give it to you right now, if he’s already committed. It may be for later in the day.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

We don’t have a local Priest. We have a Priest that juggles two or three parishes (Which is usually the case since our diocese has so few Priests), so I would feel bad if I made him drive up here forty-miles, or making my parents drive me forty-miles.

 

[JReducation]

. I just wish I lived in a town that had confessions so I could walk to it when I needed. However, unfortunately my town believes confessions aren’t necessary, and they only have it once a year.

We don’t have a local Priest. We have a Priest that juggles two or three parishes (Which is usually the case since our diocese has so few Priests), so I would feel bad if I made him drive up here forty-miles, or making my parents drive me forty-miles.

Do you notice the difference between these two statements?

Which is it?

They don’t want to provide weekly confessions because “it’s not necessary”

or

The priest travels 40 miles or more between parishes?

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[ATeutonicKnight]

Do you notice the difference between these two statements?

Which is it?

They don’t want to provide weekly confessions because “it’s not necessary”

or

The priest travels 40 miles or more between parishes?

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

Well, he’s very heretical, and his preaching is much like a televangelist (Screaming and shouting and what-not), so he naturally believes that confession isn’t necessary, and he therefore only has it once every year. However, even if he wasn’t heretical and wanted to do it, it would be hard for him to do so because he juggles two or three parishes.

 

[Oneofthewomen]

WOW!

For someone who wants to be a priest, I think you have a lot more growing up to do. Just who do you think you are labeling a priest a ‘heretic’?

Well, he’s very heretical, and his preaching is much like a televangelist (Screaming and shouting and what-not), so he naturally believes that confession isn’t necessary, and he therefore only has it once every year. However, even if he wasn’t heretical and wanted to do it, it would be hard for him to do so because he juggles two or three parishes.

 

[JReducation]

Well, he’s very heretical,

I’m looking at the signature at the bottom of your page and smiling. My friend, there was a priest who lived a rather immoral life, cohabitating with men and women. He wasn’t picky. Francis was told about him. His response was that the only thing he saw was the man who could consecrate the Eucharist and absolve him from his sins. You’re quoting St. Francis with your writing and doing the opposite of what he would do with your words.

PREMISE: and his preaching is much like a televangelist (Screaming and shouting and what-not),

CONCLUSION: so he naturally believes that confession isn’t necessary, and he therefore only has it once every year.

Many of us scream and shout when we preach; but we’re no Billy Graham.

However, even if he wasn’t heretical and wanted to do it, it would be hard for him to do so because he juggles two or three parishes.

This is the only kind thing you’ve said about the man thus far.

If I were your spiritual director, I would suggest that you go to the same priest and confess to him what you have said about him and ask his forgiveness.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[Oneofthewomen]

And this Br. Jay, is why I imagine you are a most sought-after spiritual director, and one that I would be honored to have!!
I am fortunate that my director thinks much like you do!!

If I were your spiritual director, I would suggest that you go to the same priest and confess to him what you have said about him and ask his forgiveness.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[ATeutonicKnight]

I’m looking at the signature at the bottom of your page and smiling. My friend, there was a priest who lived a rather immoral life, cohabitating with men and women. He wasn’t picky. Francis was told about him. His response was that the only thing he saw was the man who could consecrate the Eucharist and absolve him from his sins. You’re quoting St. Francis with your writing and doing the opposite of what he would do with your words.

Many of us scream and shout when we preach; but we’re no Billy Graham.

This is the only kind thing you’ve said about the man thus far.

If I were your spiritual director, I would suggest that you go to the same priest and confess to him what you have said about him and ask his forgiveness.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

I’m not criticizing him. I’m stating his behavior. He has said questionable things in the past, but I won’t go much further as apparently I was reported for what I said earlier. I still have much respect for him, as I respect any Priest/Religious. He’s a very nice guy, and he’s very passionate about what he does. We simply don’t see eye-to-eye on everything. I don’t hate him or anything of the sort. I’m simply stating his behavior. I have to confess an observation about things he’s said in the past?

 

[ATeutonicKnight]

WOW!

For someone who wants to be a priest, I think you have a lot more growing up to do. Just who do you think you are labeling a priest a ‘heretic’?

Again, I don’t hate him. He’s a very nice, compassionate, and will always help you with whatever problem you may have. I can’t state the questionable things he said since I already received an infraction (Which I believe you gave me. Don’t worry, I’m not mad. I misspoke, and I’m glad you gave me it), but he has said questionable things that the Bishop himself has talked to him about. I like him very much, and I think he’s a great Priest. He just went to a Seminary which is not well known for its orthodoxy.

P.S. You can’t give me an infraction for commenting on seminaries and their orthodoxy. I realize all seminaries approved by the Catholic Church are orthodox, but Tim Staples talks about bad seminaries all of the time, so if anyone gives me an infraction they should give Tim one as well.

 

[ConstantineTG]

Other than directing a person to sin, what can a priest really do in a confessional that can make it such a bad experience?

Confession is pretty straightforward, you confess your sins, repent and the priest gives you absolution. Even if he messes up the ritual, as long as he says “I absolve you” the sacrament is effective.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

A priest once told me in an emphatic and emotional way that he cannot absolve me unless I am sure that I will never, ever do what I confessed ever again.

I never came back to that parish.

 

[ATeutonicKnight]

A priest once told me in an emphatic and emotional way that he cannot absolve me unless I am sure that I will never, ever do what I confessed ever again.

I never came back to that parish.

I’d watch out. Say something you can’t prove about a Priest and you get an infraction, apparently.

Note: This isn’t a snide remark, it’s an honest warning, as I got the same thing and don’t want it to happen to others.

 

[JReducation]

A priest once told me in an emphatic and emotional way that he cannot absolve me unless I am sure that I will never, ever do what I confessed ever again.

I never came back to that parish.

That’s a little extreme. I can understand asking if you are going to try to never sin again.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

 

[ATeutonicKnight]

I’m just going to stop posting here. I’d like to ask the moderator to close this, as it has no more use. It’s caused more bad than good.

 

[ConstantineTG]

That’s a little extreme. I can understand asking if you are going to try to never sin again.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF

The way he said it was very scary, kind of threatening. I know we should be truly repentant of our sins, but to make a guarantee that you will never sin again is too much.

 

[JReducation]

The way he said it was very scary, kind of threatening. I know we should be truly repentant of our sins, but to make a guarantee that you will never sin again is too much.

That’s why I used the word “try”. That’s actually what you guys say in the Roman Act of Contrition.

Fraternally,

Br JR, OSF