Baptism for my child after my own conversion

[asteroid]

When our daughter was born I was a good baptist so she wasn’t baptised or anything like that.

By the time I was received into the Catholic church she was 4 1/2 so a bit old for infant baptism.

In any case, my wife isn’t Catholic, doesn’t like Catholicism much and wouldn’t want our daughter raised as such. A cause of grief.

What should I be doing re. her baptism? Basically I’ve been waiting for her to be old enough to make a fully informed decision about things and decide for herself - getting a 5 year old who doesn’t understand it baptised doesn’t seem right and it would cause big problems to go against my wife about this.

Is there anything I should be doing that I’m not?

 

[axolotl]

I’d take her to mass with you. Say Catholic bedtime prayers with her. Intoduce her to other devotions.

Five is still in infant, so you can still present her for baptism, but you don’t want to threaten the stability of marriage.

In the US at least, once a child is seven, they have to make the decision on their own. They’ll go through a kids’ version of RCIA and receive baptism, confirmation, and communion all at once in the Easter Vigil.

I have no clue as to the British protocols.

 

[mosher]

asteroid:

When our daughter was born I was a good baptist so she wasn’t baptised or anything like that.

By the time I was received into the Catholic church she was 4 1/2 so a bit old for infant baptism.

In any case, my wife isn’t Catholic, doesn’t like Catholicism much and wouldn’t want our daughter raised as such. A cause of grief.

What should I be doing re. her baptism? Basically I’ve been waiting for her to be old enough to make a fully informed decision about things and decide for herself - getting a 5 year old who doesn’t understand it baptised doesn’t seem right and it would cause big problems to go against my wife about this.

Is there anything I should be doing that I’m not?

Ask for your wives permission to have your child baptised. Ask her to allow the baptism just in case she is wrong for the sake of her child. This is how I got baptised as a child as my father is a fllen away Catholic who is agnostic.

 

[itsjustdave1988]

…getting a 5 year old who doesn’t understand it baptised doesn’t seem right

Think of the Sacrament of Baptism as a formal prayer, established by Jesus Christ, for our benefit. We pray for the Holy Spirit to be poured out upon the child in the manner established by Christ. How is this not right?

and it would cause big problems to go against my wife about this.

I agree. For the same reasons, I waited to baptize my children. My children were baptized at the same time my wife became baptized. It is a difficult situation which, God willing, can be resolved. You’re in my prayers.

As for what you should be doing, keep praying for your wife’s conversion. Speak to God about her. Speak to her about God.

 

[asteroid]

You know - I completely forgot I posted the question until lying in bed last night. Sorry about that.

Thanks for the replies everyone.

 

[Ghosty]

I was Baptized at four or five by my parents to please my grandmother primarily, as she was quite ill and quite Catholic. Neither of my parents were very Catholic (my mother not at all, but was Baptised as an adult for the same reason I was, and my father was raised Catholic but not much for practicing).

After living most of the intervening years as a secular atheist/agnostic, I’ve come to the fullness of the Catholic Faith. I call myself a convert because it really was a mental and spiritual conversion, not a “going back” to the faith of my youth as I never believed or practiced. I do think, however, that my Baptism had a HUGE effect on me spiritually, providing the Grace I needed to embrace the Church later in life, and I’m not the only one who thinks this.

My advice is that if it won’t strain your marriage, have your child Baptized. Baptism is a Sacrament, and profoundly changes one’s relationship with God, literally reshaping the soul and making it more open to the movements of God. The significance of this can’t be overstated!

Peace and God bless!

 

[puzzleannie]

asteroid:

When our daughter was born I was a good baptist so she wasn’t baptised or anything like that.

By the time I was received into the Catholic church she was 4 1/2 so a bit old for infant baptism.

In any case, my wife isn’t Catholic, doesn’t like Catholicism much and wouldn’t want our daughter raised as such. A cause of grief.

What should I be doing re. her baptism? ?

in the mind of the Church a child is considered an infant until the age of reason, generally age 7, and it is the duty of a Catholic parent to baptize his child as soon as possible after birth (or, obviously, after his own baptism). The consent of at least one parent is required, and the assurance that the child will be raised Catholic. Ordinarily when an adult is going through RCIA the school-age children go through RCIA at the same time, and the children of all ages are baptized and confirmed at the same time as the adults.

Of course, your wife’s position creates the problem. This should be resolved in consultation with your priest, ideally the priest who received you into the Church. He should guide you about how you are to deal with your child, and your family situation. You are obligated to raise your children Catholic, and your wife should have been apprised of this obligation at the time you entered the Church. A priest close to you should be the one to help you.

In the meantime, you cannot be CAtholic without living out Catholic values and teaching in all areas of your life, which includes evangelizing by your actions. Model in all areas, especially in the home, the ideal Catholic husband and father, and that example will do more than anything to influence your wife.

 

[stbruno]

osv.com/periodicals/periodicals.asp?id=19

There is a wonderful magazine called Catholic Parent…this is a link to one of the articles in it. Consider getting a subscription for your family. Leave it in a place your wife may see it. It is very entertaining as well as functional. It will give you all kinds of easy tools for raising a child Catholic from infancy to adulthood. It will also provide traditions of our church, recipes, ways to make your marriage stronger etc. And it’s all done in a beautiful colorful easily readable approach. I don’t work for the company but we do Baptism prep and we recommend families consider using this tool and even give it as gifts to new parents.
Plus here’s another link osv.com/teachingcatholicyouth/index.asp

There are so many resources available…that it might be worth looking into. With all things…pray, pray and pray some more.