Baptism: Godparent Question

[DesertChildAZ]

My husband (a non-practicing Catholic) and I (a Catholic, who does not attend service every Sunday) would like to baptize our 10 month old son in the Catholic Church. We do not have a single practicing, confirmed Roman Catholic within our group of friends and family to serve as a godparent to our son. We know many non-practicing Catholics and Roman Catholics who have not been confirmed, but no actively practicing confirmed Roman Catholics.

My stepbrother is Greek Orthodox Catholic. He and his wife were married in the Greek Orthodox Catholic church and are practicing, attending church regularly. As catholics (Orthodox, but not Roman), can they serve as godparents to our son? If not, then I don’t know what to do as the strict conditions are otherwise preventing us from baptizing our child in the Catholic religion and I do not wish to baptize him or raise him in another church. Even if we began attending church regularly to meet other practicing Catholics, I do not want someone who I just met to be my childs’ godparent since I do not know the true character of those people and I cannot insure they will be part of our lives throughout our child’s life.

What advice can you offer in our case?

Can our child be baptized in a Catholic church without Godparents?

Thank you for your advice and feedback in advance.

 

[jmcrae]

If I were you, I would consult with the priest who is instructing you at your Baptism classes. He will probably have some suggestions or ideas for you to consider.

 

[FAB]

My husband (a non-practicing Catholic) and I (a Catholic, who does not attend service every Sunday) would like to baptize our 10 month old son in the Catholic Church. We do not have a single practicing, confirmed Roman Catholic within our group of friends and family to serve as a godparent to our son. We know many non-practicing Catholics and Roman Catholics who have not been confirmed, but no actively practicing confirmed Roman Catholics.

My stepbrother is Greek Orthodox Catholic. He and his wife were married in the Greek Orthodox Catholic church and are practicing, attending church regularly. As catholics (Orthodox, but not Roman), can they serve as godparents to our son? If not, then I don’t know what to do as the strict conditions are otherwise preventing us from baptizing our child in the Catholic religion and I do not wish to baptize him or raise him in another church. Even if we began attending church regularly to meet other practicing Catholics, I do not want someone who I just met to be my childs’ godparent since I do not know the true character of those people and I cannot insure they will be part of our lives throughout our child’s life.

What advice can you offer in our case?

Can our child be baptized in a Catholic church without Godparents?

Thank you for your advice and feedback in advance.

You must have at least one person, who is in communion with the Catholic Church as a godparent. Everone else are witnesses. Perhaps start with regular Sunday attendance and you will make friends that can be godparents and then you will also be able to raise the child in the faith as you will agree to at the baptism.

 

[Pfaffenhoffen]

DesertChildAZ:
Do not ask me how this happens and what in the world the reason for that but I know some people who have as Godparents St. Joseph and the Holy Mary Mother of God.

 

[Jim_Dandy]

To have your child baptized in the Catholic Church, you commit to raise the child as a Catholic. That means you agree to take them to Mass each Sunday and see to their Catholic education and receipt of the other sacraments – Confession, Eucharist, and Confirmation, for example. A Godparent agrees to raise the child in the Faith if the parents should die. So, they must be Catholic.

 

[SuscipeMeDomine]

My stepbrother is Greek Orthodox Catholic. He and his wife were married in the Greek Orthodox Catholic church and are practicing, attending church regularly. As catholics (Orthodox, but not Roman), can they serve as godparents to our son?

There’s a difference between Greek Orthodox and Greek Catholic. You should probably clarify with your step-brother which one he is, then talk with your priest about whether he could be the godparent.

 

[DesertChildAZ]

You must have at least one person, who is in communion with the Catholic Church as a godparent. Everone else are witnesses. Perhaps start with regular Sunday attendance and you will make friends that can be godparents and then you will also be able to raise the child in the faith as you will agree to at the baptism.

I feel like I’ve already waited too long to have my son baptised (and this obstacle is honestly the only reason we haven’t done it sooner) and even if we did begin to attend regularly, I wouldn’t feel comfortable assigning a role of such importance in my child’s life to someone I have known for so short a time. I know far too many people who have taken a similar route and have no involvement whatsoever anymore with the person whom they chose to be their child’s godparent. We also don’t know that we will live in this community for very long and am doubtful that I could depend on a casual acquaintance to be my child’s lifelong godparent, especially if we move away.

 

[Wardog]

I had a similar issue with my fourth child; we had no practicing Catholics that we wanted to use as God Parents. Based on how I read the Canon Law, a God parent is not absolutely required. (see below); but the parish priest disagreed and would not work with us. When we asked if he was really going to prevent our son from being baptized, he responded, No, you are preventing him from being baptized. We left the parish and went to an adjacent one. There they worked with us, though I still found the work around objectional. The parish provided two people who we barely knew as a God Parent. It doesn’t make any sense to me that the Church can have standards on a God Parent, but the real parents concerns are of no concern. Canon Law states “In so far as possible…”. To me that means that the lack of God Parents should not prevent a baby being baptized.
I don’t think the two people who sponsored our son will help him live a christian life.

According to Canon Law # 872, “in so far as possible, a person being baptised is to be assigned a sponsor. In the case of an adult baptism, the sponsor’s role is to assist the person in christian initiation. In the case of an infant baptism, the role is together with the parents to present the child for baptism, and to help it to live a christian life befitting the baptised and faithfully to fulfil the duties inherent in baptism.”

 

[puzzleannie]

with every baptism parent-sponsor class we have at least one family in your situation, so the pastor or deacon suggests they ask the catechists, or others who assist with baptism, to be sponsors, or ask among the other parents, since here at least they often know each other already.

 

[Jim_Roberts]

My husband (a non-practicing Catholic) and I (a Catholic, who does not attend service every Sunday) would like to baptize our 10 month old son in the Catholic Church. We do not have a single practicing, confirmed Roman Catholic within our group of friends and family to serve as a godparent to our son. We know many non-practicing Catholics and Roman Catholics who have not been confirmed, but no actively practicing confirmed Roman Catholics.

My stepbrother is Greek Orthodox Catholic. He and his wife were married in the Greek Orthodox Catholic church and are practicing, attending church regularly. As catholics (Orthodox, but not Roman), can they serve as godparents to our son? If not, then I don’t know what to do as the strict conditions are otherwise preventing us from baptizing our child in the Catholic religion and I do not wish to baptize him or raise him in another church. Even if we began attending church regularly to meet other practicing Catholics, I do not want someone who I just met to be my childs’ godparent since I do not know the true character of those people and I cannot insure they will be part of our lives throughout our child’s life.

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

Your religion IS NOT in unionn with Rome, so, ,therefore your b aptism would be INVALID;.

JESUS I TRUST IN YOU

jr

What advice can you offer in our case?

Can our child be baptized in a Catholic church without Godparents?

Thank you for your advice and feedback in advance.

 

[DesertChildAZ]

To have your child baptized in the Catholic Church, you commit to raise the child as a Catholic. That means you agree to take them to Mass each Sunday and see to their Catholic education and receipt of the other sacraments – Confession, Eucharist, and Confirmation, for example. A Godparent agrees to raise the child in the Faith if the parents should die. So, they must be Catholic.

We understand the reasoning behind the rules but unfortunately understanding that reason does not dissolve the challenge we face. As long as we do not have an acceptable and trusted Godparent, we cannot baptized our child and raise him Catholic. Our goal here is to find someone who we trust and can depend on to follow through with our wishes. Isn’t that the responsible thing to do? And while we know many people who we trust to do that, none of them are practicing, confirmed Catholics. And yet the Church would prefer that we bestow this sacred role upon very casual acquaintences, who we’ve known for but a few months, instead of a non-confirmed Catholic relative who will be in our child’s life forever, regardless of where we move? I do not see the logic in that. Especially when the alternative is to baptize my child in a different religion. That is not something I wish to do, but I’m starting to feel pushed into that corner. For discussion purposes, I have to ask: Why would the Church adhere to rules that prevent, or make it more difficult for, the innocent souls of newborns from being baptized in the Catholic religion?

 

[DesertChildAZ]

Jim_Roberts:
Excuse me? [In regard to Post 11]

 

[maryjk]

We understand the reasoning behind the rules but unfortunately understanding that reason does not dissolve the challenge we face. As long as we do not have an acceptable and trusted Godparent, we cannot baptized our child and raise him Catholic. Our goal here is to find someone who we trust and can depend on to follow through with our wishes. Isn’t that the responsible thing to do? And while we know many people who we trust to do that, none of them are practicing, confirmed Catholics. And yet the Church would prefer that we bestow this sacred role upon very casual acquaintences, who we’ve known for but a few months, instead of a non-confirmed Catholic relative who will be in our child’s life forever, regardless of where we move? I do not see the logic in that. Especially when the alternative is to baptize my child in a different religion. That is not something I wish to do, but I’m starting to feel pushed into that corner. For discussion purposes, I have to ask: Why would the Church adhere to rules that prevent, or make it more difficult for, the innocent souls of newborns from being baptized in the Catholic religion?

It sounds like you want to have a non-Catholic to be your child’s Catholic Godparent. Is that what you mean? If so, to me, that would be like calling a Rabbi to perform Anointing of the Sick. You need a Catholic person to fill a Catholic position.

What wishes do you want the Godparent to carry out? Maybe you are confusing the term Godparent with Guardian?

 

[DesertChildAZ]

It sounds like you want to have a non-Catholic to be your child’s Catholic Godparent. Is that what you mean? If so, to me, that would be like calling a Rabbi to perform Anointing of the Sick. You need a Catholic person to fill a Catholic position.

What wishes do you want the Godparent to carry out? Maybe you are confusing the term Godparent with Guardian?

My post does not suggest that I want a non-Catholic to be my child’s godparent. I know MANY Catholics who I would trust to serve as my child’s godparent,that I know would encourage and support his Catholic education, but most of them are either not regularly attending church (I define that to mean “non-practicing”), attend only on major holidays or are not confirmed.

By the way, my own godparents lived 3,000 miles away from me growing up (we moved across country when I was 3) and, as a result, didn’t have a single thing to do with my Catholic education, my communion or confirmation. It was my non-practicing Catholic mother (who never attended Sunday mass once in my life) who got me to my CCD classes and made sure I attended church nearly every Sunday (although it didn’t hurt that we lived right next to the church).

In electing a godparent, I am providing my child with a sponsor who will assist him in leading a Christian life and insuring that he completes the obligations required within the Catholic faith including, but not limited to, communion and confirmation.

 

[jmcrae]

My post does not suggest that I want a non-Catholic to be my child’s godparent. I know MANY Catholics who I would trust to serve as my child’s godparent,that I know would encourage and support his Catholic education, but most of them are either not regularly attending church (I define that to mean “non-practicing”), attend only on major holidays or are not confirmed.

Confirmation is one of the three Sacraments of Initiation, so someone who is not yet Confirmed isn’t actually yet a Catholic - they are still considered to be in the learning/training phase.

In electing a godparent, I am providing my child with a sponsor who will assist him in leading a Christian life and insuring that he completes the obligations required within the Catholic faith including, but not limited to, communion and confirmation.

Yes - and the most important obligation of them all is weekly Sunday attendance at Mass. If they aren’t attending Mass regularly, how will they teach your child that this is the most important thing he has to do all week? And if they don’t take their faith seriously enough to get Confirmed, then what message will that send to your child, when it comes time for him to seek out the Sacrament of Confirmation?

What your own godparents did or did not do is not related to the question - I assume you’re looking for god-parents who will do what god-parents are supposed to do.

Edited to add: the whole problem could be solved, if you could convince your relatives to seek out the Sacrament of Confirmation - even if it is only for the sake of becoming your child’s God-parent.

 

[maryjk]

My post does not suggest that I want a non-Catholic to be my child’s godparent. I know MANY Catholics who I would trust to serve as my child’s godparent,that I know would encourage and support his Catholic education, but most of them are either not regularly attending church (I define that to mean “non-practicing”), attend only on major holidays or are not confirmed.

By not attending Mass, your friends are not meeting their own obligations. But you trust them to encourage your child to meet theirs?

By the way, my own godparents lived 3,000 miles away from me growing up (we moved across country when I was 3) and, as a result, didn’t have a single thing to do with my Catholic education, my communion or confirmation. It was my non-practicing Catholic mother (who never attended Sunday mass once in my life) who got me to my CCD classes and made sure I attended church nearly every Sunday (although it didn’t hurt that we lived right next to the church).

Parents are the primary instructors of the faith. By having you Baptized, your mother agreed to make sure you attended Mass and CCD.

In electing a godparent, I am providing my child with a sponsor who will assist him in leading a Christian life and insuring that he completes the obligations required within the Catholic faith including, but not limited to, communion and confirmation.

One of the obligations of a Catholic Christian is to attend Mass on Sundays and Holy Days. How would a non-practicing Catholic help your child understand those obligations if they don’t understand it themselves?

 

[felsguy]

Confirmation is one of the three Sacraments of Initiation, so someone who is not yet Confirmed isn’t actually yet a Catholic - they are still considered to be in the learning/training phase.

:nope: Not wishing to be offensive, but the statement above is totally incorrect.

 

[jmcrae]

jmcrae;8306485:

Confirmation is one of the three Sacraments of Initiation, so someone who is not yet Confirmed isn’t actually yet a Catholic - they are still considered to be in the learning/training phase.

:nope: Not wishing to be offensive, but the statement above is totally incorrect.

They are Catholic in a technical sense, but they are not yet fully initiated with all three Sacraments of Initiation. You need all three Sacraments of Initiation before you can go on to receive Holy Orders or Matrimony, and before you can become a god-parent, or a Catechist, or be employed in the office, or any other active function in the Church.

 

[felsguy]

felsguy;8306508:

They are Catholic in a technical sense, but they are not yet fully initiated with all three Sacraments of Initiation. You need all three Sacraments of Initiation before you can go on to receive Holy Orders or Matrimony, and before you can become a god-parent, or a Catechist, or be employed in the office, or any other active function in the Church.

I don’t wish to hijack this thread by quibbling over words and while agreeing that they are not yet “fully initiated,” I posit that they are indeed “Catholic” PERIOD and that there is no “technical sense” about it.

And unless things are different of the dioceses of Canada I am curious on what basis you state that unconfirmed Catholics cannot become “a Catechist, or be employed in the office, or any other active function in the Church.”

Again, I’m not looking to be argumentative but think it important for the many who read these posts that information be as accurate as possible.

 

[Wardog]

By not attending Mass, your friends are not meeting their own obligations. But you trust them to encourage your child to meet theirs? :shrugarents are the primary instructors of the faith. By having you Baptized, your mother agreed to make sure you attended Mass and CCD.

One of the obligations of a Catholic Christian is to attend Mass on Sundays and Holy Days. How would a non-practicing Catholic help your child understand those obligations if they don’t understand it themselves?

They would do it because I asked them to, that is how. The two sponsors picked by the Church for my son’s baptism sure are not doing anything. That is why I wanted no God Parents, which appears to be allowed by Canon Law.