Everyone knows that the Vatican has established sleeper cells all over the country. During his visit the pope will give a secret signal and they will all be activated. Their first targets will be Baptist churches.
The secret signal is the word “bingo”.
In my city we’ve already staked out Bible bookstores too. We can’t take any chances. Annulments may be free, but Salvations will cost $20,000. (Your dead relatives only $5000).
The Statue of Liberty will be somewhat adjusted, into a statue of You-Know-Who, stepping on that snake at the base.
Police officers will be issued a yardstick, to whack evil doers.
The Income Tax will be replaced by 50/50 Split Club.
Godly pastors and evangelists will be hunted down by Holy Name with packs of rabid dogs.
The White House will be converted into a monastery where monks make booze.
The Declaration of Independence will be burned, and replaced by The Declaration of Dependence on the Sacramental System.
Godly Southern states will be put into receivership, and government seized by Knights of Columbus carpetbaggers coming down from the North.
There will be a special tax specific to non-Catholics, similar to the Muslim Sharia, but we’ll call it Pew Rental.
I could go on like this all night

But I’ll spare you.