Baptize and Church requirements questions

[Sir_Knight]

A woman that I know recently had a baby and ran into, what she considers to be roadblocks, in trying to get her child baptized. It seems that she is REQUIRED to attend some classes prior to the baptism and make a minimum donation of $100 to the church in order to have her child baptized.

Having fallen on hard economic times, the donation of $100 is sizeable for them. Additionally, both her and her husband are working full-time and do not have time to attend these classes. She doesn’t understand why she has to take classes when she is already raising children that have been baptized in the faith.

My little one was baptized over a decade ago and I didn’t encounter any of this back them. What options are available to her?

She’s thinking about not even having the baby baptized because she HEARD the new Pope declare “that babies no longer are born with sin, so they don’t need to be baptized”. I never heard this. I thought that us being born with Original Sin and requiring baptism was a doctrine of the Church and therefore can never be changed.

 

[Phemie]

Parents are expected to be prepared for Baptism, if for no other reason than to know what it is and what it obligates you to.
Per Canon Law:

Can. 867 §1. Parents are obliged to take care that infants are baptized in the first few weeks; as soon as possible after the birth or even before it, they are to go to the pastor to request the sacrament for their child and to be prepared properly for it.

25-30 years ago, when my 3 were baptized, the priests didn’t require us to take classes, although with the last the priest came to our house and essentially wanted to know why I was asking for Baptism. Since I was very active in parish ministry (reader, EMHC, etc) and the older 2 were always with me, he was pretty confident that this baby would in fact be raised in the Church.

The thinking has changed since then and so has the number of parents approaching the Church for Baptism without any idea of why we baptize or what Baptism does and obligates one to. Now, I teach the classes.

We usually charge a fee equal to the amount we spend on supplies: about $10. We always run our classes in the evening or weekends (now on a Saturday afternoon, for 2 hours + attendance at the anticipated Sunday Mass) and I’ve been known to meet with families outside of the scheduled classes if that is more convenient. I’ve even done preparation over the phone for people who live in communities with no Catholic Church and who will be coming to our parish for Baptism (I deal with people in isolated communties in the North).

The theology of Original Sin hasn’t changed. It’s just that recently Limbo has been clarified as not being doctrine but theory. In fact, for a few decades we’ve been making clear that we don’t know what happens to unbaptized children who die. We commit them to the mercy of God and hope that they are with Him in spite of Original Sin.

 

[PhilotheaZ]

The Church can never charge for the sacraments. There may sometimes be a small fee to cover legitimate expenses, but any fee should be waived or reduced if a person cannot afford it. From the Code of Canon Law (bold emphasis added):

Can. 848 The minister is to seek nothing for the administration of the sacraments beyond the offerings defined by competent authority, always taking care that the needy are not deprived of the assistance of the sacraments because of poverty.

The classes are to ensure that the parents understand their responsibility to raise their children in the faith. Some parishes do not require parents to attend if the parents have already had children baptized and are known to be practicing their faith (attending Mass weekly, seeing that their children are properly catechized, attending Mass, receiving the sacraments at the proper times, etc.).

But if your friends are expected to take classes, they should make every effort to do so. The classes are usually not very time-consuming, and we usually find time to squeeze all kinds of things into our busy schedules. Preparing ourselves to raise our children in the faith should be considered a very important use of our time.

 

[kage_ar]

What people HEAR and what actually happens can be two very very very different things.

Ring Ring

“Hello, St Whomever Office, may I help you”

“This is So and Thus. I need to have baby sweetie pie baptized.”

“Are you a registered Parishioner”

Slightly offended “Why of course, I am” (hearing begins to shut down a bit from offense that the secretary did not immediately recognize ME)

“Did you take the Baptism prep class that Deacon Y gives each month?”

More offended, I have been Catholic my entire LIFE and my parents paid for that parish hall what on EARTH could that deacon teach ME “No. I want to have sweetie pie baptized on the 14th.”

“The next class is Nov 4.”

“And what is THAT going to cost me?”

“With cost of the book, the stipend, etc. most families make one donation”

“I need to know WHAT THIS IS GOING TO COST ME”

“The family last week donated $100”

“Well, I never - humph”.

CLICK dial tone.

Your friend would be well advised to make an appointment to speak with her priest who will explain everything to her.

 

[Joannm]

What people HEAR and what actually happens can be two very very very different things.

Ring Ring

“Hello, St Whomever Office, may I help you”

“This is So and Thus. I need to have baby sweetie pie baptized.”

“Are you a registered Parishioner”

Slightly offended “Why of course, I am” (hearing begins to shut down a bit from offense that the secretary did not immediately recognize ME)

“Did you take the Baptism prep class that Deacon Y gives each month?”

More offended, I have been Catholic my entire LIFE and my parents paid for that parish hall what on EARTH could that deacon teach ME “No. I want to have sweetie pie baptized on the 14th.”

“The next class is Nov 4.”

“And what is THAT going to cost me?”

“With cost of the book, the stipend, etc. most families make one donation”

“I need to know WHAT THIS IS GOING TO COST ME”

“The family last week donated $100”

“Well, I never - humph”.

CLICK dial tone.

Your friend would be well advised to make an appointment to speak with her priest who will explain everything to her.

Oh this sounds so familiar. We also get.

We also get when asked if they go to Mass.
“Well I have a baby you know, it is very difficult. Why should that be important?”

When asked if they are registered.
“I grew up here, my parents are registered.” Of courese they have been out of their parents house 8 years but never bothered to register.

When we tell them about class.
“I don’t have time to attend class.” “The day is not convenient.” “I can’t get a sitter.” “I went through 8 years of Catholics school, I already know this stuff.” At this point I ask them to make an appointment with the priest for instruction at their convience.

The best is when I say we don’t do private baptisms and they say.
"But I don’t want anyone else at MY child’s baptism. It takes away from OUR special day.
Gee, I thought you child is being baptised into a community.

Our first time parents have to go to 2 classes and one Mass (where we do a blessing of unbaptized children). ALL parents have to go the the Mass and the class following it. Some complain but most do go.

 

[Phemie]

Oh this sounds so familiar. We also get.

We also get when asked if they go to Mass.
“Well I have a baby you know, it is very difficult. Why should that be important?”

When asked if they are registered.
“I grew up here, my parents are registered.” Of courese they have been out of their parents house 8 years but never bothered to register.

When we tell them about class.
“I don’t have time to attend class.” “The day is not convenient.” “I can’t get a sitter.” “I went through 8 years of Catholics school, I already know this stuff.” At this point I ask them to make an appointment with the priest for instruction at their convience.

The best is when I say we don’t do private baptisms and they say.
"But I don’t want anyone else at MY child’s baptism. It takes away from OUR special day.
Gee, I thought you child is being baptised into a community.

Our first time parents have to go to 2 classes and one Mass (where we do a blessing of unbaptized children). ALL parents have to go the the Mass and the class following it. Some complain but most do go.

 

[1ke]

A woman that I know recently had a baby and ran into, what she considers to be roadblocks, in trying to get her child baptized. It seems that she is REQUIRED to attend some classes prior to the baptism and make a minimum donation of $100 to the church in order to have her child baptized.

Of course there is a class, and of course they are expected to take part.

Regarding fees, this varies from parish to parish, and as has already been mentioned one cannot be denied the sacrament if unable to pay a fee as the fee is not for the sacrament itself but for a stipend and other things associated with the sacrament. So, your friend should simply say they cannot pay it and remind any church secretary or ministry person of the requirements of canon law on the subject if they get flack.

She doesn’t understand why she has to take classes when she is already raising children that have been baptized in the faith.

Well, at a minimum because the priest asked her to, and at a maximum maybe because she will learn something. The priest has to ensure that parents are properly prepared to undertake their duties, and even though they have other children perhaps this parish sees fit to have all parents go through baptismal prep. I have parents go through prep with their kids for FHC an Confirmation even if they’ve had other kids in past years.

She’s thinking about not even having the baby baptized because she HEARD the new Pope declare “that babies no longer are born with sin, so they don’t need to be baptized”. I never heard this. I thought that us being born with Original Sin and requiring baptism was a doctrine of the Church and therefore can never be changed.

People hear all sorts of things. Perhaps she “heard” this on the radio when it was tuned to the “wishful thinking” channel. Don’t believe everything you hear, nor what other people say they “heard.”

Pope Benedict XVI said no such thing. You are correct regarding the doctrine of Original Sin, the necessity of Baptism, and that Church doctrine does not change.

 

[puzzleannie]

she obviously heard the pope say no such thing about original sin, so I doubt her hearing or her recall was very acute about the conversation with her parish secretary.

My guess the $100 donation stands for a minimal $2 a week per year expected from a family that has been registered in the parish that long. If they can’t afford that, they should be inquiring about the social services for which the parish can refer them.

She must show evidence to the pastor that the child will be raised Catholic, that is canon law. One of the few ways pastors have of judging the sincerity of Catholic parents is their participation at Mass, and one of the few ways they have of judging that is if regular offering envelopes are given. The secretary was probably giving the normal rules, and your friend chose to misunderstand to justify her decision not to baptize her baby.

She is also obviously in need of even the minimal instruction in the meaning of the sacrament and the obligations of Catholic parents if she is capable of equivocating on something so important.