Baptizing my 3 year old

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taylorjenee

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Hello.

I am in the process of becoming Catholic (going through RCIA) and I have a son who is almost 3. I am going to be having him baptized as soon as possible, but coming from a protestant background, I want to make sure I know what to do. I understand that he should wear all white so I am looking into a little white suit for him. What is customary as far as a reception? What else do I need to know? Any information would be helpful, including appropriate gift ideas for a God Father. Please remember, I know very little about this so far (I’ve never even been to an infant baptism)!

Thank you!

Taylor
 
A white suit is good but if you cannot afford that a simple white shirt and nice pants will do. He does not need to wear all white.

Typically those invited to a baptism or confirmation in my area will be hosted by the parents with something simple–usually cake and punch.

Typically God parents give gifts, not get them. However if you’d like to give a gift perhaps get a holy card or picture of your son’s patron saint or have masses said.
 
Your parish will likely have you attend a baptismal prep class for parents (and maybe godparents?) where they will address many of your questions. The priest for my daughter’s baptism wanted her in a simple, everyday outfit before and she was to be changed into the white dress at that point in the rite where the baptismal garment is presented/mentioned. In my son’s case, the [different] priest wanted him dressed in white in advance. Some of these things are parish custom or priest preference.
 
White suit? Not sure about that. My son was baptized at age two, and he wore a nice shirt and pants. Our parish provided the white garment that was almost like a smock. I think a lady in the parish made them.
 
He can wear whatever you want. Doesn’t have to be white or a suit. Unless that is your country’s practice

And congratulations!
 
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Loud-living-dogma said:
White suit? Not sure about that. My son was baptized at age two, and he wore a nice shirt and pants. Our parish provided the white garment that was almost like a smock. I think a lady in the parish made them.
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In my parish we just use an altered altar server’s alb for toddlers and preschoolers. Kids come in regular clothes and are dressed in the alb at the presentation of the white garment.
 
It is ceremonial and therefore may vary from parish to parish. Since you are in RCIA, why don’t you ask what’s the requirements in your parish.

Welcome home.

God bless.
 
In our parish, we provide a white shawl to wrap round them as it’s easy to do. We take it back at the end of the service.
 
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I suggest asking whoever is in charge of your RCIA class or maybe the deacon or priest what would be appropriate attire for the baptism itself. A white suit seems fine for the reception.

I suggest asking because it’s customary for older children and adults to be given a white robe to be put on over their old garments after the baptism. At one recent Easter I attended a number of parents argued quite passionately with the instructor that they refused to have their children do this because they wanted their children to not cover up their nice white suits and dresses, so the instructor (unhappily) compromised and had them don a white stole instead of a white robe.

Point being, find out what the custom is for the mass itself so there are no surprises. As I said, that was for older children (7+). I don’t think I’ve seen that always with infants or children your child’s age, but it’s always good to check.
 
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No req for a white suit, or ever for a suit! Clean clothes, if you can afford it maybe an outfit comparable what he would wear to Easter Sunday. No need to spend money on something that will never be worn again.

Reception is not required, but, you can be as small or large as you want.
 
Wesrock said:
I suggest asking because it’s customary for older children and adults to be given a white robe to be put on over their old garments after the baptism.
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I’ve worked for parishes and been involved with the Diocese, have only seen this done in videos from the 80’s.
 
My brother was baptized as a toddler; he had the white shirt/white pants/white vest/white tie. It was a nice outward visual sign saying that “something different is happening today”.

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Don’t forget to get your baptismal candle! I totally didn’t think about that for my older one-- it was a good thing the church provided them! For my next, I was better prepared. 🙂

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When I baptized mine, I invited the parishoners over to the parish hall. I had made breakfast crepes with strawberries and strawberry syrup-- we heated up the crepes and served them, because it was an 8 am Mass, and I thought that it was a bit early to offer cake. But a white cake with white icing/flowers/whatever is also very appropriate.

Godparents usually give gifts, rather than receive them, but I’d have them over for dinner or something sometime, not necessarily the day of the baptism.
 
taylorjenee said:
I am in the process of becoming Catholic (going through RCIA) and I have a son who is almost 3.
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Welcome to Catholic Answers Forums and also I hope that you and your son feel welcome to the Catholic Church. I’m so glad for you!

My children were all baptized older than 3. They just wore “Sunday best” or Easter type clothes, which is what the pastor recommended. We didn’t have a reception, just a lunch at a nice restaurant. I can’t remember what (if anything) we got for the godparents.
 
All great responses so far. I just wanted to mention to keep the baptismal candle as you’ll need it later for First Holy Communion and Confirmation!
 
Best to ask and check then, because my wife went through RCIA just a couple years ago and all the children and adults wore purple robes prior to and during baptism and were given white robes afterwards (some of the children were given white stoles because the parents argued against covering up the white suits and dresses).
 
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Not any place I have ever lived.

Could you imagine a horde of 7 year olds with candles? It’s hard enough for them to walk in a straight line without kamikazing into each other or a pew.
 
JanetF said:
ll great responses so far. I just wanted to mention to keep the baptismal candle as you’ll need it later for First Holy Communion and Confirmation!
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Cradle Catholic here, parent, and member of nine parishes (couldn’t hold a job…just kidding) and not familiar with this. Local or family custom perhaps??

Also never experienced any dress requirements other than those associated with baptisms at the Easter Vigil.
 
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I know I had a priest who suggested lighting them each year on the anniversary of your baptism, to bring it to mind and to celebrate it, rather than letting it just be some forgotten, obscure event in your past.
 
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