Battles with scrupulousity

[roseproject]

Scrupulosity and OCD has been an issue with me for a while. It’s gotten better, but scrupulosity and anxiety associated with that is still kind of an issue with me.

One thing about OCD and scruples is the tendency to blow a moral issue (if it IS even an issue at all), religious “rule” or discipline, etc. out of proportion.
For an example, sometimes when I sit down to watch a show that I like, there may be one or two episodes in it that have a bit of questionable things in it (nothing exceedingly graphic, sexual, or whatnot. Maybe mildly PG-13 stuff like, idk, suggestive dialogue or a side character or two who have some less than honorable tendencies sometimes…Think, ‘Inuyasha’ and the like.). I can see it coming because I can read the episode description. I know there will probably be a little bit of rude humor or whatnot in said episode, but I don’t like skipping any episodes because I might miss some of the story. So, I wonder whether or not I should watch the episode. So, in an attempt to not let my scrupulosity control me all the time, I watch it.

The thing is, when one is scrupulous, we oftentimes heavily anticipate any sort of thing that might taint our souls, often to the extreme. So, when I feel especially scrupulous, things that may not have been an issue previously suddenly feel like the most terrible sin ever! I expect it, then when I see such “questionable scenes”, it feels as if Jesus is breathing down my back and judging me and whatnot -___- Then, I feel like I should’ve not watched the episode. Was is a moment of willingly putting myself into a situation where I might think impure thoughts and was, because of this, a sin?

Sometimes, these moments of battling my scrupulosity feel like I’m turning my back from God because of the guilt I oftentimes feel. There are even times when batting my scruples has probably made me legitimately stumble occasionally; not listening to my scruples at all and accidentally falling into a legitimate sin. It’s this balance between going too far with your scruples, and then…not worrying about purity at all. It can be a difficult battle for someone with scruples.

Any advice?

Thanks in advance

 

[johnnyt3000]

I have the scruples as well. They have gotten much much better because of a good priest I’ve talked to. Talk to a priest about this and ask him about finding a spiritual director. Also, what really helped me was a book I read called “Scruples and Sainthood” by Trent Beattie. The only bad thing about the book I want to point out is in chapter twelve where he says venial sins can be absolved by holy water and other things besides the Eucharist. I asked a priest about this and he said that praying an act of contrition absolves venial sins, but not holy water. But the rest of the entire book will most certainly help those who scrupulous. Anyway… regarding scruples, if one is scrupulous, they are not obligated to do that which they have doubts whether they must do something or not. Liberty in doubt. If you have anxiety whether you sinned or not, be assured you have not. When in times of scruples, cling to Our loving Mother in heaven. Our God, is a loving and merciful God who wants us to be with Him so much that He gave us His only begotten son to die for us. He is a loving Father. God bless.

 

[johnnyt3000]

mission.liguori.org/newsletters/scrupulosity2.htm

 

[littlestsouls2]

Hi roseproject,

Try not to over-analyse. Find a confessor and obey them; holy simplicity is liberating and safe. St. Alphonsus gives us many reasons to trust in our confessor. I think you will find the following link very consoling:

littlestsouls.wordpress.com/2014/10/06/consolation-for-scrupulous-souls-some-advice-from-st-alphonsus/

Many films and shows today are very trashy and should be avoided. I would include shows like Entourage on this list.

Other shows/movies are imperfect, but not obscene. God does not ask all of us to give up everything that is imperfect. If He did, most of us would be without friends! I certainly am far from perfect.

In relation to impurity in films, perhaps a few things should be kept in mind:

• Don’t look for absolute certainty; you won’t find it. Simply obey a holy and learned confessor, and avoid all obviously sinful movies/shows.
• Don’t watch that which is an occasion of sin for you. Swearing, for example, might be an occasion of sin for you, but then again, it might not. A holy and learned priest of the Fraternity of Saint Peter said to me that swearing in movies, unless excessive (note: not an absolute term), is generally permissible for mature adults. Keep in mind, however, that this was said to me in a particular context; you will need to speak to a priest about your particular struggles/questions/scenario.

Our Lord said to St. Bridget that if her confessor told her to eat many meals a day, she should do so without fear. Likewise, if a priest gives you some advice and you analyse it, then analyse it some more, you will end up trusting yourself, not God. Again, please consider reading the link; St. Alphonsus gives some great advice.

There are many shows and films that I refuse to watch; but when I do decide to watch something, I generally stick it out until the end, and if anything bad comes up, I might say a little prayer. On one occasion, I just decided to turn the film off, half-way through. Some will tell you to give up shows/movies altogether, but T.V. is morally neutral in itself, like a computer, and what you expose yourself to should be moderated by prayer, reason and most of all, a child-like obedience.

Pax Domini!

ps. nice artworks! I own a set of Copic Ciaos and have recently been working on some drawing myself, including anime/manga drawings. ‘5 Centimetres Per Second’ is a beautiful example of the artwork that I would like to re-create. I can always dream!

 

[Bookcat]

I will re-post an older post of mine.

A person struggles with scruples - what ought they do?

A person with scrupulosity --ought to have a* “regular confessor” who can direct them --and even give them some general principles* to follow -to apply (principles for them due to their particular scruples -they are usually not for those with a normal conscience).

Thus with their direction they can “dismiss scruples” (in the older language despise them) - “act against them”.

Scruples are to be dismissed ~ not argued with.

To borrow and image from a Carthusian from centuries ago: Scruples *are like a barking dog or a hissing goose -one does not stop to argue with a barking dog or a hissing goose does one? * No one keeps walking.

Such ‘obedience’ to a regular confessor who knows of ones scruples (except in what is manifest sin - such as if he told them it was ok to murder someone or something certain like that) is key. Such is the age old practice.

Also counseling -(especially if one also has OCD) could be helpful depending on the case -but one would want to look for a counselor who can assist one in following the Churches Teachings - not go contrary to them (I have heard CA staff mention catholictherapists.com/)

Here was a recent post from Jimmy Akin of CA that I saw in the Register and saved for those who struggle with such.

ncregister.com/blog/jimmy-akin/6-tools-for-the-scrupulous

 

[Bookcat]

where he says venial sins can be absolved by holy water and other things besides the Eucharist. I asked a priest about this and he said that praying an act of contrition absolves venial sins, but not holy water. .

Only Absolution - “absolves” venial sins. But that is just a clarification. I know you meant to discuss the many ways that venial sins can be* forgiven* outside of Confession.

Yes there are* many *ways for venial sins to be forgiven (though it is also good to make use of frequent confession). And the devout use of Holy Water - YES - is included in such. The Priest may have been thinking of holy water just used not out of devotion or something. Or that someone thinks that merely getting wet with water forgives sins.

The devote use of holy water is of the similar approach as praying an act of contrition.

One is already in charity - living in Christ. Venial sins are forgiven as it were from the “inside” when one prays etc.

As St. Thomas notes regarding Holy Water (among other things) -that conduces to the forgiveness of venial sins cause such includes the movement of reverence towards God.

Holy Water has been listed in works of Theology down through the ages as one of the ways yes we can seek forgiveness of venial sins.

Holy Water being particularly helpful not only via the blessing but via the sign value of the water both as a “washing” and a reminder of baptism…(indeed it can be a good way to seek to make that devotional renewal of our baptismal promises.). And of course with the devote use of Sacramentals - such involves not only the Faith of the person but the prayer and the blessing of the Church.

Note too that the rite of sprinkling with Holy Water (again reminder of baptism) can replace the normal penitential rite in the Mass…

---

To re post an older post of mine:

Many acts contribute to the forgiveness of sins-- such as prayer, contrition, charity, the devout use of holy water, reading Sacred Scripture, the penitential rite at Mass, the Our Father, devote use of other sacramentals, little short prayers during the day, acts of love etc etc etc.

And of course receiving Jesus in Holy Communion…

From the Catechism:

1436 Eucharist and Penance. Daily conversion and penance find their source and nourishment in the Eucharist, for in it is made present the sacrifice of Christ which has reconciled us with God. Through the Eucharist those who live from the life of Christ are fed and strengthened. "It is a remedy to free us from our daily faults and to preserve us from mortal sins."35

1394 As bodily nourishment restores lost strength, so the Eucharist strengthens our charity, which tends to be weakened in daily life; and this living charity wipes away venial sins.231 By giving himself to us Christ revives our love and enables us to break our disordered attachments to creatures and root ourselves in him

1437 Reading Sacred Scripture, praying the Liturgy of the Hours and the Our Father - every sincere act of worship or devotion revives the spirit of conversion and repentance within us and contributes to the forgiveness of our sins.

scborromeo.org/ccc/p2s2c2a4.htm#V​

Let me add to regarding the Lords Prayer especially:

Saint Augustine noted in 395 to his catechumens to live their Baptism - but in doing so they would not live without venial sins - for life is never without such - and that daily prayer was instituted to blot them out.

Let us pray the Our Father as St. Augustine spoke of being prayed for such daily venial sins …“forgive us our trespasses…” He noted that for such sins we were given prayer - and especially noted the Lords Prayer.

Indeed in the early Church such was often prayed three times a day. A wonderful practice that my family follows.

CCC The first communities prayed the Lord’s Prayer three times a day, in place of the “Eighteen Benedictions” customary in Jewish piety. scborromeo.org/ccc/p4s2a1.htm

 

[roseproject]

ps. nice artworks! I own a set of Copic Ciaos and have recently been working on some drawing myself, including anime/manga drawings. ‘5 Centimetres Per Second’ is a beautiful example of the artwork that I would like to re-create. I can always dream!

Thank you Yeah, the art of ‘5 Centimeters Per Second’ (and other works by the same director) are amazing!

Thanks for the advice and links, too

 

[littlestsouls2]

Thank you Yeah, the art of ‘5 Centimeters Per Second’ (and other works by the same director) are amazing!

Thanks for the advice and links, too

You’re welcome

I absolutely agree. Keep up the good work!

 

[johnnyt3000]

Only Absolution - “absolves” venial sins. But that is just a clarification. I know you meant to discuss the many ways that venial sins can be* forgiven* outside of Confession.

Yes there are* many *ways for venial sins to be forgiven (though it is also good to make use of frequent confession). And the devout use of Holy Water - YES - is included in such. The Priest may have been thinking of holy water just used not out of devotion or something. Or that someone thinks that merely getting wet with water forgives sins.

The devote use of holy water is of the similar approach as praying an act of contrition.

One is already in charity - living in Christ. Venial sins are forgiven as it were from the “inside” when one prays etc.

As St. Thomas notes regarding Holy Water (among other things) -that conduces to the forgiveness of venial sins cause such includes the movement of reverence towards God.

Holy Water has been listed in works of Theology down through the ages as one of the ways yes we can seek forgiveness of venial sins.

Holy Water being particularly helpful not only via the blessing but via the sign value of the water both as a “washing” and a reminder of baptism…(indeed it can be a good way to seek to make that devotional renewal of our baptismal promises.). And of course with the devote use of Sacramentals - such involves not only the Faith of the person but the prayer and the blessing of the Church.

Note too that the rite of sprinkling with Holy Water (again reminder of baptism) can replace the normal penitential rite in the Mass…

---

To re post an older post of mine:

Many acts contribute to the forgiveness of sins-- such as prayer, contrition, charity, the devout use of holy water, reading Sacred Scripture, the penitential rite at Mass, the Our Father, devote use of other sacramentals, little short prayers during the day, acts of love etc etc etc.

And of course receiving Jesus in Holy Communion…

From the Catechism:

1436 Eucharist and Penance. Daily conversion and penance find their source and nourishment in the Eucharist, for in it is made present the sacrifice of Christ which has reconciled us with God. Through the Eucharist those who live from the life of Christ are fed and strengthened. "It is a remedy to free us from our daily faults and to preserve us from mortal sins."35

1394 As bodily nourishment restores lost strength, so the Eucharist strengthens our charity, which tends to be weakened in daily life; and this living charity wipes away venial sins.231 By giving himself to us Christ revives our love and enables us to break our disordered attachments to creatures and root ourselves in him

1437 Reading Sacred Scripture, praying the Liturgy of the Hours and the Our Father - every sincere act of worship or devotion revives the spirit of conversion and repentance within us and contributes to the forgiveness of our sins.

scborromeo.org/ccc/p2s2c2a4.htm#V​

Let me add to regarding the Lords Prayer especially:

Saint Augustine noted in 395 to his catechumens to live their Baptism - but in doing so they would not live without venial sins - for life is never without such - and that daily prayer was instituted to blot them out.

Let us pray the Our Father as St. Augustine spoke of being prayed for such daily venial sins …“forgive us our trespasses…” He noted that for such sins we were given prayer - and especially noted the Lords Prayer.

Indeed in the early Church such was often prayed three times a day. A wonderful practice that my family follows.

CCC The first communities prayed the Lord’s Prayer three times a day, in place of the “Eighteen Benedictions” customary in Jewish piety. scborromeo.org/ccc/p4s2a1.htm

Thank you for the info. What is the difference between a sin being forgiven and a sin being absolved?

 

[Bookcat]

Thank you for the info. What is the difference between a sin being forgiven and a sin being absolved?

Absolution is part of the Sacrament (with all the effects of the Sacrament)…Forgiveness is of course involve to but there is more going on

IX. THE EFFECTS OF THIS SACRAMENT

1468 "The whole power of the sacrament of Penance consists in restoring us to God’s grace and joining us with him in an intimate friendship."73 Reconciliation with God is thus the purpose and effect of this sacrament. For those who receive the sacrament of Penance with contrite heart and religious disposition, reconciliation "is usually followed by peace and serenity of conscience with strong spiritual consolation."74 Indeed the sacrament of Reconciliation with God brings about a true “spiritual resurrection,” restoration of the dignity and blessings of the life of the children of God, of which the most precious is friendship with God.75

1469 This sacrament reconciles us with the Church. Sin damages or even breaks fraternal communion. The sacrament of Penance repairs or restores it. In this sense it does not simply heal the one restored to ecclesial communion, but has also a revitalizing effect on the life of the Church which suffered from the sin of one of her members.76 Re-established or strengthened in the communion of saints, the sinner is made stronger by the exchange of spiritual goods among all the living members of the Body of Christ, whether still on pilgrimage or already in the heavenly homeland:77

It must be recalled that . . . this reconciliation with God leads, as it were, to other reconciliations, which repair the other breaches caused by sin. The forgiven penitent is reconciled with himself in his inmost being, where he regains his innermost truth. He is reconciled with his brethren whom he has in some way offended and wounded. He is reconciled with the Church. He is reconciled with all creation.78

1470 In this sacrament, the sinner, placing himself before the merciful judgment of God, anticipates in a certain way the judgment to which he will be subjected at the end of his earthly life. For it is now, in this life, that we are offered the choice between life and death, and it is only by the road of conversion that we can enter the Kingdom, from which one is excluded by grave sin.79 In converting to Christ through penance and faith, the sinner passes from death to life and "does not come into judgment."80

scborromeo.org/ccc/ccc_toc.htm