Beign specific in confession: IV commandment

[Mezz2015]

Hi all, I have some doubts about specificity in confession.

I want to confess sins I commited against my parents, let’s say: I told my mom that I would abandon her when she would be old, My dad saw me drinking when I was a teenager and he got angry, I made my mom cry, I was ashamed of them(at school, with friends, because they were poor etc), I talked loud when they wanted to sleep etc.

Do I need to confess every single sin like those above mentioned(pages and pages of sins it would be), or could I confess: “I disrespected my parents many many times, in all the ways possible, I made my mom cry, I insulted them, I lied to them and made them angry and I was ashamed of them many times and situations?”

Help please!

 

[Mezz2015]

Also another doubt: sins of blasphemy, how should I confess them?

Saying: I blasphed a lot of times, because I was angry, in front of other people to cause scandel, in front of my parents etc.
Or should I say what I blasphemed? Like: I blasphemed the bible, the saints etc.
Should I say the words I used when I blasphemed?

 

[peter26]

You don’t need to be specific, though it would need to be more specific than that you violated a particular one of the 10 Commandments. “I was disrespectful to my parents”, “I took God’s name in vain” “I made blasphemous comments/jokes”, would be quite sufficient.

 

[St_Francis]

You only need to confess kind and number, unless there are circumstances which make the sin worse (briefly state those factors). So I blasphemed against the Bible and saints about 10 times a week or threes times a day or twice a month, and against God (worse) about 1/4 as much. I disobeyed my parents (when a minor) about ten or fifteen times a week or once a month or twice a year. I was *very *rebellious on several occasions–making my mother cry or my dad yell at me about 7 times in all, or three of four times a year for 5 years. I shoplifted about once a month; on 4 occasions I pressured my friend (worse) to do it too.

Also helpful for Confession: to explain who you are generally: I am a young man in his late teens, or a husband and father–then the priest will be able to see more clearly what is going on. If you say, It’s been three weeks since my last confession; I am a 50-year-old man and then confess that you didn’t do something your mother told you to do, it’s a different case than if you are a minor still living at home or a 20-year-old who has not been to confession for 8 years.

 

[roveau]

You have to be considerate to the priest and all those other people waiting in line to confess their sins. If everybody listed every possible sin in the greatest detail, the priest wouldn’t be able to hear all the others wanting to confess.

The bottom line is that the priest will guide you if he is not clear on the nature of, for example, a serious sin. If you are in doubt, just ask the priest.

The more frequently you go to Confession, the less you will have to confess of course and it gives you time to ask the priest about matters of sin that you would like clarified.

 

[Tigre]

You have to be considerate to the priest and all those other people waiting in line to confess their sins. If everybody listed every possible sin in the greatest detail, the priest wouldn’t be able to hear all the others wanting to confess.

The bottom line is that the priest will guide you if he is not clear on the nature of, for example, a serious sin. If you are in doubt, just ask the priest.

The more frequently you go to Confession, the less you will have to confess of course and it gives you time to ask the priest about matters of sin that you would like clarified.

Agreed. It sounds like this is your first confession or the first in a long while. I think you would benefit greatly from making an appointment with your priest rather than going during the regular time. Neither of you will be rushed, there will be plenty of time for guidance, and you can get your whole list addressed.

 

[Mezz2015]

Thanks, I already made an appointment with the priest. I actually want to confess a lot of sins against all the commandments because it’s the end of the year and I want to start a new year and new life.

Thanks for the advice

 

[LaughingBoy1503]

Thanks, I already made an appointment with the priest. I actually want to confess a lot of sins against all the commandments because it’s the end of the year and I want to start a new year and new life.

Thanks for the advice

Good for you! So many people do not care about confession and repentance. God bless!

 

[Joshua_Shorter]

Thanks, I already made an appointment with the priest. I actually want to confess a lot of sins against all the commandments because it’s the end of the year and I want to start a new year and new life.

Thanks for the advice

What a wonderful way to begin the new year! Please remember, the priest understands that simply because you are going to confession you want to be better. If you didn’t, you wouldn’t go. That means your trying! Confess the things that weigh on your heart and let the Holy Spirit and the priest guide you.

I will be praying for you and everyone making year-end confessions. Please pray for me as I go to confession on Wednesday, as well.

 

[MissRose73]

Thanks, I already made an appointment with the priest. I actually want to confess a lot of sins against all the commandments because it’s the end of the year and I want to start a new year and new life.

Thanks for the advice

Good for you. My goal for 2015 was to go to confession monthly which I accomplished. I will again set the same goal for 2016. Many just don’t realize the many graces they can get from going to Confession more than 1 or 2 times in a year. For me, I feel a burden of sorts lifted after leaving the confessional which feels good inside.

 

[AttendeDomine]

First of all, you should strive to confess your mortal sins, unless you’re going to Confession in a habitual state of grace, in which case you should stick to three or four venial sins that you regularly commit or that were particularly grave.

Now, do you think that each of the sins you committed against your parents was mortally sinful? For example, speaking loudly to keep them up is stupid and immature and it’s sinful. Under certain (perhaps unusual) circumstances, it can even be mortally sinful. But I’m not sure the default understanding of such a sin is that it’s grave matter.

What it sounds like you need is some help in distinguishing mortal from venial sins. To that end, I recommend this examination of conscience: materdeiparish.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/Examination-of-Conscience-for-Adults.pdf

Now, this document is massive. But if you go through it—especially to get a feel for what the difference between mortal and venial sins are—I think it can help you. It’s only the second examination of conscience I’ve ever seen that separates mortal from venial sins.

For example, in the section on obedience, you’ll see certain mortal sins:

Have I deliberately given in to hatred of my mother or my father, refusing to speak to them over a considerable period of time?
Have I deliberately wished serious harm to my parents, e.g., that they would die so that I might possess their goods?
Have I habitually treated my parents harshly, speaking contemptuously to them or of them, ridiculing them, cursing them [that is, seriously wishing them to be damned], causing them severe pain and sorrow?

… and these in the venial section:

Have I failed in the respect due my parents, by laughing at them, being openly ashamed of them, talking harshly or angrily to them, saying unkind things about them?
Have I been stubborn and peevish and openly resentful against parents?
Have I selfishly refused to make life more comfortable and enjoyable for my parents when I could have done so?

So yes, if you go through these, you will get a good feeling for whether you’re really guilty of mortal or venial sins against your parents. While only you can know, it frankly seems to me that you may have been a pretty silly towards them, perhaps in the heat of anger, but that the things you mention are probably venial sins.