Being a family law solicitor

[Agnes_God]

I know this thread is mostly abour religious vocations but id like to ask a question about secular vocations. All my life ive wanted to be a lawyer and ive worked very hard to get there. I am currently about to get my practicing certificate in law and feel I am called to practice in family law. Whilst most students hate it and thinks its messy I absolutely love it and am quite good at it.

Can you be a lawyer and deal with divorces/separation of families and the mess that is associated with it and still adhere to the Catholic faith? I dont intend on being a marriage counsellor and try to keep a marriage together but my aim would be to make the split as fair as possible and to make it as easy on the children as possible, of course i realise that part of my work would be to be a counsellor and I honestly believe I would be good at it, im no-nonsense but also compassionate when it comes to these issues as I work in the field already.

How do i discern this calling? I genuinely believe thats what it is, everytime I want to try and involve myself in a new area of law I find myself yearning to go back to family law. Is it even possible that God could be calling me to assist people in a divorce? Id like to eventually be a judge in the family law courts. Any assistance would be greatly appreciated.

 

[odubhghail]

The Church teaches that marriage is a sacrament. The Church teaches that marriage is indissoluble, period. Would God, according to the teachings of the Church, call someone to facilitate divorce? Doubtful. Therefore, being a divorce lawyer, no matter how good it may feel to make a bad situation less bitter, is not a calling from God.
Which would be the lesser of two evils, giving counsel so as to improve a bad marriage, and possibly promote healing in the family, or enabling a most traumatic event, which is what divorce is?

 

[LilyM]

The Church teaches that marriage is a sacrament. The Church teaches that marriage is indissoluble, period. Would God, according to the teachings of the Church, call someone to facilitate divorce? Doubtful. Therefore, being a divorce lawyer, no matter how good it may feel to make a bad situation less bitter, is not a calling from God.
Which would be the lesser of two evils, giving counsel so as to improve a bad marriage, and possibly promote healing in the family, or enabling a most traumatic event, which is what divorce is?

First of all family lawyers have a multitude of different tasks, not all related to facilitating divorce per se - they work to ensure adequate child care arrangements in the case of already separated or divorced couples, and to ensure payment of appropriate maintenance (where the entitlement exists) by spouses and parents who are separated.

As for civil divorce - read the Catechism. Not only is civil divorce permissible, in the case of truly unworkable marriages and as a last resort, it is sometimes a necessity and a duty in order to ensure protection of the legal rights, the physical safety, or the financial security of one or more of the parties or their children.

Sometimes staying in a very abusive marriage, thereby endangering the physical safety and financial and emotional wellbeing of yourself or your children, is both the greater evil and positively a sin.

 

[Agnes_God]

Lily I absolutely agree with you. I work in a legal centre that provides legal advice on many different things, I speak to people who have done very bad things (mostly criminal law type things-and no matter what theyve done I believe everyone has a right to legal representation and a fair trial) as well as debt matters, and family law. For some reason family law strikes me as an area of law I need to be, I genuinely feel this. I think alot of the times men get the raw end of the deal with family law arrangements and so do the kids. Being a family law lawyer doesnt mean ill be advising people to get a divorce, most that come through the door have already separated and want to know their rights on a just and equitable split of assets or arrangements for children. I think there are far too many bad lawyers out there who dont care about the family, my aim is not to be a counsellor and help families reunite but to make the split as reasonably less difficult for children and families in general, of course in the line of work I assume that i’ll be a shoulder to cry on but I mostly care about the welfare of the family, even if its not in unity any more.

In terms of advising specifically on divorce I would not hesitate to advise someone to get one if theyve been living in an abusive relationships, whether sexual or physical, ive seen the product of such an upbringing (substance abuse in teenagers and even children, depression and anxiety, violence, sexual abuse, promiscuity in young women who have little respect for themselves and a cycle that repeats itself with the next generation). Fact is some people will never listen or change and will continue exercising their power an abusing their families and I would advise to get a divorce where it is appropriate. Some marriages are simply beyond counselling or “working it out”.