Being called a good girl?

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Hi,

A couple of days ago while working, me and a man who is a family friend and like a second dad to me were talking about things, and while we were talking he mentioned that I was a good girl. A little info, I’m 17, don’t date or go out partying, and am rather reserved with myself, if that makes sense, and I also strive to do well with everything. I’m not really that worried about it, but I’m just curious what some of you think he may have meant, especially if you’ve said something like this to someone else, or if you’ve been in a similar situation. Also, sometimes I’m not very clear, so if you have any questions or need clarification, you’re more than welcome to ask me. Thanks!
 
OP, maybe these lyrics from the song “Free Fallin’” by Tom Petty will help clarify. 🙂

“She’s a good girl, loves her mama
Loves Jesus and America too
She’s a good girl, crazy 'bout Elvis
Loves horses and…”…

Blue quote above excerpted from lyrics of “Free Fallin” by Tom Petty.
 
What was the context of the comment? Surely the way it was used conveyed whether he meant it as a positive or pejorative comment.

If he just made the comment apropos of nothing, then take it as a compliment. And a lovely one at that.
 
underacloud said:
What was the context of the comment? Surely the way it was used conveyed whether he meant it as a positive or pejorative comment.

If he just made the comment apropos of nothing, then take it as a compliment. And a lovely one at that.
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I really don’t think he meant it in a bad way. We had been talking about random stories from when he was younger and in my past few years and during the talks I told him about feeling like I don’t do well with things and that it kind of worries me to almost be an adult.
 
TQGC said:
I really don’t think he meant it in a bad way. We had been talking about random stories from when he was younger and in my past few years and during the talks I told him about feeling like I don’t do well with things and that it kind of worries me to almost be an adult.
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I’d take that as an endoursement of the life you’ve lived so far, which is the foundation for your future adult life. He obviously thinks you’ve made good choices and have a good head on your shoulders.

Becoming an adult is an exciting and challenging time. I think he’s just trying to encourage you and indicate that he has faith in you to meet those challenges.
 
When I was 17 if an older man would have said to me ‘you are a good girl’ that would have made me feel weird and creepy.

However, if you consider him a second dad and are comfortable sharing with him, it could be a different situation.

However, you need to understand there is such a thing as a generation gap and that will always exist between teenagers and middle aged people. I remember my father use to say things to younger girls such as my cousins and I could tell they were uncomfortable. In my father’s mind it was a compliment but he did not understand that expressionsn that meant one thing when he was growing up sound weird to the next generation. My dad was a stubborn one who would not change. IOW, even though this man’s intentions are innocent, I do think you have the right to ask him not to make statements that make you uncomfortable and if he does not stop, walk away from him

Angie
 
I remember a guy in work telling me that I was a good girl, and I thought it was very condescending, so I replied thanks, you are a good boy.

I never heard that expression used to me again. As I did not know what he exactly meant.
 
I will be 16 soon… and I know what you mean… I have the same happen to me…
It’s ok to be called good… but depends on how / Where and when it’s said…
 
SwizzleStick said:
This.
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Agreed.

A humorous aside, a friend and I were talking, and the phrase “good girl” came up. In wanders my golden retriever with the expression on her face as if saying " were you guys just talking about me?"😃
 
Sarcelle said:
Agreed.

A humorous aside, a friend and I were talking, and the phrase “good girl” came up. In wanders my golden retriever with the expression on her face as if saying " were you guys just talking about me?"😃
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Bless you for sharing that! It made me smile! Thank you so much! 😃
 
TQGC said:
I really don’t think he meant it in a bad way. We had been talking about random stories from when he was younger and in my past few years and during the talks I told him about feeling like I don’t do well with things and that it kind of worries me to almost be an adult.
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Take the compliment for what it is, but you know yourself better than anyone else.
 
TQGC said:
Hi,

A couple of days ago while working, me and a man who is a family friend and like a second dad to me were talking about things, and while we were talking he mentioned that I was a good girl. A little info, I’m 17, don’t date or go out partying, and am rather reserved with myself, if that makes sense, and I also strive to do well with everything. I’m not really that worried about it, but I’m just curious what some of you think he may have meant, especially if you’ve said something like this to someone else, or if you’ve been in a similar situation. Also, sometimes I’m not very clear, so if you have any questions or need clarification, you’re more than welcome to ask me. Thanks!
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In some contexts, this can mean “virgin.”

In this context, I would say he meant you are a good kid. So…keep up the good work. 👍
 
Regardless of how it was meant you could always just say, "
Thank you, I feel called to be Holy and good. You recognizing that helps me affirm my decisions. Though it kind of hurts my attempt to remain humble.;)"
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And then move on in the conversation.👍
 
Bklynguy said:
In some contexts, this can mean “virgin.”

In this context, I would say he meant you are a good kid. So…keep up the good work. 👍
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Hmm, I didn’t know that could be used in some contexts. 😊 But yeah, I don’t think he would have meant it in that way. A little too weird for me to think about.
 
TQGC said:
Hmm, I didn’t know that could be used in some contexts. 😊 But yeah, I don’t think he would have meant it in that way. A little too weird for me to think about.
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Yes, I doubt he meant it that way.
 
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