Better Communication

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brycehecht

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Hello everyone. My mother is a catholic. She identifies her self as one, though her beliefs are not in accordance with the doctrine of the Catholic Church. For example, she believes that animals go to Heaven. Pope John Paul II once stated that animals have souls. Aquinas says they have souls, but do not go to Heaven. Her view contradicts the Catholic view. This is just a small example. She is pro-choice and she believes it is okay for two men to love each other beyond mere friendship (in a marital way). How do I deal with this when conversations regarding these topics are brought up? I want to be a priest. I agree with the Catholic doctrine, and am in support of it. I feel like my wanting to be a priest will stir up a lot of controversy. How do I deal with this?
 
Unfortunately, I believe this is something we all have to face in this age and time. I know it’s probably rare for a Catholic’s parent(s) to feel this way, but it is something that does happen. My advice for you is to leave it as it is for now. I no it’s difficult, trust me. I have relatives who declare themselves Catholic, yet agree on abortion. It doesn’t make sense, but that is the world we live in today. God is calling you to be a Priest. He knows what He’s doing. Perhaps he is preparing you for the hardships you may face regarding parishioners who feel their beliefs lay where your Mother’s currently are. If your Mother brings it up, let her talk, and then slowly change the subject, or just say, “Mom, I know how you feel about this, but right now, what you’re saying is really hurting me. I don’t mind if you talk about it, but I really don’t want to be engaged in such conversation.” This way, you’re telling her that you really don’t mind her talking about it, but that it makes you feel uncomfortable to have a conversation about it with her. If you’d like to talk more about it, you’ve got my email and are more than welcome to email me.
 
It could be a problem of catechesis (this kind of thing oftentimes is, speaking from my own personal experience). On the other hand, she might’ve read the entire catechism cover-to-cover and honestly disagreed with some of it. You could try just showing a good example by being humble and nice when she brings these things up, and you could also say a quick prayer for her every night before you go to bed.
 
brycehecht said:
Hello everyone. My mother is a catholic. She identifies her self as one, though her beliefs are not in accordance with the doctrine of the Catholic Church. For example, she believes that animals go to Heaven. Pope John Paul II once stated that animals have souls. Aquinas says they have souls, but do not go to Heaven. Her view contradicts the Catholic view. This is just a small example. She is pro-choice and she believes it is okay for two men to love each other beyond mere friendship (in a marital way). How do I deal with this when conversations regarding these topics are brought up? I want to be a priest. I agree with the Catholic doctrine, and am in support of it. I feel like my wanting to be a priest will stir up a lot of controversy. How do I deal with this?
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I would leave the pet issue alone, pick your battles. That, to me, is of lesser importance.
I don’t think it’s a mortal sin to believe a dog/cat could go to heaven.

However, the issue of believing abortion and same-sex relationships is another story.

My suggestion to you would be to get a copy of “The Catechism of the Catholic Church”. I don’t know if libraries normally carry it or not. I think it can also be found online on certain issues.

Look up the issues …abortion…same sex relationships…go to those pages and start quoting the catechism to her.

If she doesn’t believe you, suggest she talk to a priest for additional confirmation. It is NOT optional for us. We are not to be “cafeteria Catholics” and say we like certain doctrines and dogmas. If we are truly Catholic, we strive our best to believe ALL of them.

There are some things that are considered “optional”. For example…the apparitions of Mary. The Church says a few are worthy of belief. However, it also says you can be a good practicing Catholic without accepting these.

However, you CAN’T be a good practicing Catholic and defend abortion and homosexuality. She might think you can. Quote the catechism to her.

If she still resists, you at least gave it your very best effort. Either way, pray for her to come around.

I will, as well.

Hail Mary, Full of Grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blest is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen. :gopray:
 
I was rereading your post…I just had overlooked the priesthood issue.

We NEED good priests! We pray all the time for vocations!

You have to follow your heart, and God, above EVERYTHING & EVERYONE ELSE!

Christ said that if we love our mother or father more than him, we are not worthy to be his disciple.
biblestudytools.com/matthew/10-37-compare.html

Further, he said that once we started, we were not to look back. Otherwise, we would be unworthy of him…biblestudytools.com/luke/9-62-compare.html

Anyway, good luck in your discernment and your situation.

God bless. I’ll close with a prayer.

Hail Mary, Full of Grace, the Lord is with thee. Blessed art thou amongst women, and blest is the fruit of thy womb, Jesus. Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. Amen.
 
You may never be able to convert your mother to fully orthodox doctrinal positions on issues. Read Christ’s parable of the sower.

Regarding all the hot button issues you mention, please refer to paragraph 1715 of the Catechism which discusses a variety of reasons that people might not be condemned for their otherwise objectionable conduct.
 
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