Birth control help!

[rosary_warrior]

Hello everyone I need help please!

Me and my husband have been married for a year now, and we do have a 5 month old child together(we were engaged while he was conceived) we only got married by the state not in the church yet(we are planing a church wedding)

So as we are on this journey, I am trying to make things right with God. After I had my son I got the birth control implant in my arm… this is where the big dilemma starts.

Me and my husband are pretty poor right now, we sometimes can’t even pay rent (we rent from his parents they own apartments) and we are very tight on money it pretty much goes to bills and essentials.

I’m pretty scared of getting pregnant right now. I am pro condoms in marriage but I am really on the fence about chemical birth control. Because it does prevent pregnancy by tricking your body but in certain cases it can cause the body to abort the embryo (( I am so sad about this.

I really don’t know what to do guys… should I get this thing taken out of my arm? Please give me your honest opinion. Thank you and God bless

 

[rosary_warrior]

I am pro condoms, I don’t think it’s right to bring a child into this world when you are incredibly poor. That’s just my opinion. I’m more worried about the fact of chemical birth control because that can cause an abortion which is evil.
Thank you for your prayers I will pray for you too

 

[Kei]

Speak with your pastor.
The Church views all forms of contraception as evil, as sexual activity should be ordered to being open to life.

 

[rosary_warrior]

So here’s my question, do you not agree with the churches views on natural contreception? (Rhythm method) this allows a couple to have sex when they are not fertile.

 

[guanophore]

So here’s my question, do you not agree with the churches views on natural contreception? (Rhythm method) this allows a couple to have sex when they are not fertile.

Actually the Church no longer promotes this method, as Natural Family Planning is more effective.

http://www.usccb.org/issues-and-action/marriage-and-family/natural-family-planning/

It is likely that the OP would have some problems implementing this method also due to financial constraints. It involves some meticulous research and record keeping.

The real question is, why plan to be married in the Catholic Church or say one is "getting things right if one does not really want to comply with Catholic teaching?

 

[rosary_warrior]

So I’m not allowed to get married because I’m scared of bringing 1000000 children into poverty?

What would you do? I’m asking about NFP and what I should do in my situation. You don’t need to be rude

 

[rosary_warrior]

Thank you for being kind, I will. I feel so guilty using the birth control. I know there are apps on the phone for NFP too. I just need some support as this is a scary time for me and my husband.

 

[Rau]

I am pro condoms, I don’t think it’s right to bring a child into this world when you are incredibly poor.

Condoms are a means to that end. So is no or less sex.

I’m more worried about the fact of chemical birth control because that can cause an abortion which is evil.

That may be true, though I understand it is disputed in some circles. If you believe it does cause risk of abortion, morally, you’d be inclined to remove it then - would you not?

 

[guanophore]

So I’m not allowed to get married because I’m scared of bringing 1000000 children into poverty?

What would you do? I’m asking about NFP and what I should do in my situation. You don’t need to be rude

I apologize, I was not meaning to be rude, I am just wondering why one would go about pretending to conform with a way of life with which they do not agree, and don’t want to follow?

It is not possible for any one person to bring that many children into the world without using some extensive technology for reproduction, and it is not likely to be accomplished during your lifetime, even if you wanted to produce that many offspring.

What you seem to be saying is that you are afraid, and you cannot trust God to be Lord of your reproductive life. You do not trust God enough to provide for you and your family to the extent that you are wiling to commit a sacrilege (enter a sacramental marriage) so that you can be in control instead of letting God be in control.

Would it not demonstrate more integrity just to leave the situation as it is, so that it is not compounded?

 

[rosary_warrior]

Yes I am going to have it removed, I’ve come to thag conclusion

 

[rosary_warrior]

I just don’t know how I could be on the verge of not having a place to live and then not use some sort of protection thag is my dilemma. I should trust in god more you are right

 

[Rau]

I just don’t know how I could be on the verge of not having a place to live and then not use some sort of protection thag is my dilemma. I should trust in god more you are right

You’ve not commented on the alternative to abstain from sexual relations.

 

[Kei]

A method of family planning that utilizes timed abstinence is allowed in some cases.

Contraceptive use and abortion are both moral evils. Speak with your priest about the situation.

 

[1ke]

I really don’t know what to do guys… should I get this thing taken out of my arm?

I would encourage you to learn and embrace fully the Church’s teaching that contraception is grave matter against the sixth commandment.

 

[1ke]

use some sort of protection

You use self control instead. You abstain during the fertile times when you are spacing children.

You don’t need to protect yourself from children or your husband. They aren’t enemies. Even the vocabulary, “protection”, should clue you in this has no place in the sacrament of marriage where we are called to give ourselves fully and without reservation as Christ gave himself up for the Church.

 

[simonjosiah1]

I’m sorry, the only way is abstinence, me and my other half after marriage had a terrible experience, nearly died in pregnancy, preeclampsia at 20 weeks, stilbiirth, blood count so low a pregnancy could be so dangerous , we had to abstain

 

[TheLittleLady]

There are many scientific ways to monotor your fertility. The “rhythm method” was practiced back in the 40s and 50s, it is now called the “Standard Days Method” and is the least reliable method of charting fertility.

Each marital act must be ordered toward procreation. That means you don’t do anything to mutilate or distort the act, like using chemicals or condoms.

Poor people are not in some way unworthy to welcome children in a marriage, however, a couple may discern serious financial reasons to delay pregnancy.

The chemicals used in your implant are the same as in BCPs.

Read what the Church teaches, understand the dignity of marriage. Study the Creighton Method, Sympto Thermal Method, the Billings Method, the Marquette Method.

Congrats on your child!

 

[TheLittleLady]

If you are afraid to have children, review your pre-cana classes. Catch your breath. Recover from childbirth, get past the no-sleep phase of babyhood.

There is time to understand the beauty of the Truth.

 

[guanophore]

I just don’t know how I could be on the verge of not having a place to live and then not use some sort of protection thag is my dilemma.

This is a very normal and expected human response to uncertainty and poverty. Housing insecurity is a difficult situation in which to risk pregnancy/childbirth. This is the same situation in which the Mother of our Lord found herself.

You use self control instead. You abstain during the fertile times when you are spacing children.

God will bless your obedience and give you the grace to succeed. Your marriage would greatly benefit from periods of abstinence dedicated to prayer. This is something that you were not able to develop prior to the marriage, but it is never too late! For all you know, you are in this situation so that God can bring this blessing into your lives.

 

[Anicette]

For non sacramentally married couple, abstinence is the morally way.

Implant can lead to prevent implantation of an embryon, as you know.
It could also decrease milk supply, so it’s not an ideal method during brestfeeding.

Learning a method of NFP is not ideal near post partum as you are. It is possible, but it’s better to have your normal cycles. If you are interested don’t rely only in nfp app, get complete course in one method.