Birth Control

[TCEL]

When we were attempting NFP, the emotional and mental torment it caused my wife was obvious (due to very irregular periods). And I would have wanted more children than the two we had, but she had a tough time with our second and had experienced miscarriages (ran in the family). So two was it.

(I am so sorry to hear that both of you went through this! I had always had irregular cycles and a few other funky things, but through charting, we learned the underlying problem was due to my thyroid. So, now it’s been addressed, and I feel much better to boot! I would have had no idea if I had been on the pill, or until I had perhaps attempted to conceive. {This is not something my doctor told me, but conclusions I came to on reflecting on my life.} I’m a huge advocate of charting and pro-life doctors for the sake of women’s general health. It has helped many women I personally know.)

 

[petras52]

I think you’ve done the best you can. You told them it is a sin and gave them the alternative. If they don’t listen to you, there is nothing more for you do but pray.

Artificial Birth Control (ABC) is a mortal sin. Anyone that willingly does it will not inherit eternal life. Yes, they can confess this sin before they die, but no one knows when and how they will die. Some people never get a last chance to confess (e.g. car accident or heart attack). People living like this are risking their eternal life every moment of their life. Natural Family Planning (NFP) is morally licit to prevent pregnancies if the couple cannot afford more children.

Maybe, but what I struggle with is the fact that a non catholic can practice abc and bottom line get a free “get out of jail card” for doing the exact same thing…if an act was truly morally evil to warrant eternal damnation, how could it apply only to catholics…the reasoning just doesn’t sense…

 

[GangGreen]

A person who does a sexual act that is not open to life commits a mortal sin and endangers their soul to damnation unless they repent and attempt to amend their lives.

Contraception is the greatest sexual evil that there is in how widespread and accepted its use is and the road it leads down. Let’s quickly examine.

One who finds contraception to be OK does not believe in the sanctity of the marital act. Period.

Divorcing the sexual act from its procreative nature makes sex about pleasure rather than what its true nature is. I don’t care if you’ve had your two kids and you want to stop. That’s your own selfish desire. By artificially closing off sex to the even remote possibility of procreation (which accurately using NFP would still leave), you’re making sex 100% about pleasure and have no desire to glorify God by your acts.

If we look at sex from the Church’s point of view all sexual acts must be unitive meaning between a husband and wife and procreative meaning open to the creation of new life.

If sex is only about pleasure, then why reserve it for marriage? Why not just have sex with whomever you want? If sex is not about the possibility of procreation, the creation and nurturing of the next generation of humanity, then we’ve made it about pleasure and in which case purpose of being married in order to have and raise children is a null point. So then if sex isn’t about procreation and is only about pleasure, then if you don’t want to ever have children, it’s ok to just have sex outside of marriage. I mean, why not, right?

And if sex is just about pleasure, then what’s the difference between a heterosexual act and a homosexual act? Both yield the same result if we’re shutting out procreation.

and hence the world we live in today.

 

[ExGratia]

Maybe, but what I struggle with is the fact that a non catholic can practice abc and bottom line get a free “get out of jail card” for doing the exact same thing…if an act was truly morally evil to warrant eternal damnation, how could it apply only to catholics…the reasoning just doesn’t sense…

I understand where you are coming from, but there is no “get out of jail free” card on this issue. Proper use of our sexuality is part of the Natural Law, which is written on each of our hearts. The Church cannot change Her mandates on this because they aren’t actually her mandates but God’s. Of course, not everyone who commits any serious sin is necessarily guilty of mortal sin (due to lack of knowledge or consent). But committing a grievous act always has an effect on our relationship with God and others.

To put it another way: The Church commands us to not eat meat on Fridays of Lent. This could change (rules of fasting/abstention have changed over the years). As Catholics, we must be obedient to the Church our Lord founded. But everyone–not just Catholics–must obey the Natural Law. ABC is a violation of natural law, which cannot change.

 

[antunesaa]

I found out the other day that my mom and dad practiced birth control. She said that they wanted to be 100% positive that they wouldn’t accidentally get pregnant. They wanted to discuss this with me, and I said there are other ways of morally preventing pregnancy, such as NFP. They don’t want to hear this. They believe that the world suffers when people procreate, and then they are not able to afford their children. They think birth control is 100% effective, and the overall best way to go. How to discuss this with them?

With all due respect, why don’t you leave them alone? Now that you stated your opinion, it’s their call. Besides, “they have Moses and the prophets; let them hear them.” (Luke 16, 29)

 

[kozlosap]

With all due respect, why don’t you leave them alone? Now that you stated your opinion, it’s their call. Besides, “they have Moses and the prophets; let them hear them.” (Luke 16, 29)

Perfect Answer! It must be so enchanting for those obsessed with contraception to sit back and know that 95 percent of all Catholics will not get into Heaven because at one time or another during their lives they used ABC. Those who dwell on the “rule” aspects of our Church instead of following what Christ demanded we do during life might be really surprised when they reach those pearly gates. Maybe trying to wrap their logic around the idea that contraception is contraception whether it has the word “natural” in the descriptor will help them to be more charitable with others.

 

[IBombAtomically]

I wouldn’t discuss it with them further. If it comes up again, you can always simply state Church teaching, and leave it at that. My parents used ABC, too.

Trying to convince them probably won’t work: you can see from the responses how those who use ABC get very defensive, and are quick to assure everyone of their own salvation. While I cannot judge anyone, it is a dangerous mentality that “God’s Laws are God’s Laws… unless it’s one I don’t want to follow, in which case it becomes a law that God probably doesn’t care about anyway.”

 

[edwest2]

A person who does a sexual act that is not open to life commits a mortal sin and endangers their soul to damnation unless they repent and attempt to amend their lives.

Contraception is the greatest sexual evil that there is in how widespread and accepted its use is and the road it leads down. Let’s quickly examine.

One who finds contraception to be OK does not believe in the sanctity of the marital act. Period.

Divorcing the sexual act from its procreative nature makes sex about pleasure rather than what its true nature is. I don’t care if you’ve had your two kids and you want to stop. That’s your own selfish desire. By artificially closing off sex to the even remote possibility of procreation (which accurately using NFP would still leave), you’re making sex 100% about pleasure and have no desire to glorify God by your acts.

If we look at sex from the Church’s point of view all sexual acts must be unitive meaning between a husband and wife and procreative meaning open to the creation of new life.

If sex is only about pleasure, then why reserve it for marriage? Why not just have sex with whomever you want? If sex is not about the possibility of procreation, the creation and nurturing of the next generation of humanity, then we’ve made it about pleasure and in which case purpose of being married in order to have and raise children is a null point. So then if sex isn’t about procreation and is only about pleasure, then if you don’t want to ever have children, it’s ok to just have sex outside of marriage. I mean, why not, right?

And if sex is just about pleasure, then what’s the difference between a heterosexual act and a homosexual act? Both yield the same result if we’re shutting out procreation.

and hence the world we live in today.

That’s the problem. To quote the Hippies: “Hey man. If it feels good, do it.”

No limits is the current marketing slogan and it all came out of the ‘sex without love revolution’ of the late 1960s.

Peace,
Ed