Black Humor and One-liners

[Lost_Sheep]

I enjoy joking with the medical personnel who are treating me, usually at my own expense, but that’s okay.

When I had my first colonoscopy I was in the recovery room. The doctor came in and I asked him “My wife wants to know if you found my head.”

 

[DaveBj]

When I had my first colonoscopy I was in the recovery room. The doctor came in and I asked him “My wife wants to know if you found my head.”

I’m sure every doc who does c’scopies has heard that at one time or another

Back on the general subject, sometimes we have to laugh to keep from crying,

 

[LilyM]

I enjoy joking with the medical personnel who are treating me, usually at my own expense, but that’s okay. I think I got that trait from my father, who was a hoot at the nursing home where he spent the last couple years of his life. I have cracked up doctors when they are using the otoscope to look in one ear by holding my hand up on the other side of my head and asking, “How many fingers?” Also, I had an adult circumcision performed by an Air Force doctor assisted by my Air Force orthodontist (a Jew). The op was done under a local anesthetic, and I waited until they were half-way through and then asked, “Is it too late to change my mind?”

Takes a brave man to joke with someone WHILE they are wielding a scalpel around that area - laughter-induced slippage could be dangerous! :bigyikes:

 

[Tenebrae]

My favorite has always been “In spite of all that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the play?”

 

[Lost_Sheep]

A few more an EMT friend of mine has shared:

Circling the Drain (CTD) – a patient who is in severely injured and close to death.

Frequent Flyer – a patient whose medical history you know by heart because you see them so often; often these are the homeless, drug seekers, alcoholics, or chronically ill.

DK – a way of saying “drunk” in front of the patient or bystanders without being totally obvious.

Acute Lead Poisoning – gunshot wound

Crispy Critter - A body recovered from the scene of a fire.

Road Pizza - Victim of an automobile accident.

Code Brown – A elderly patient whose diaper needs changed.

Push the Diesel - A play on the term “pushing meds” via an IV, it is telling the ambulance driver to drive fast.

Smurf – a patient who is turning blue from lack of oxygen

TMB – a diagnosis associated with elderly patients who are falling apart: “Too Many Birthdays.”

 

[GEddie]

True – but what he was, or rather WAS NOT wearing under the bindings might have started a riot among the spectators!

But he could have stayed wrapped up with just his eyes and ankles undone!

Still , LOL!

ICXC NIKA

 

[didymus]

I think one thing to be beware of is that while medical or cop humor can relieve the pressure the job entails it can probably reach the point where it dehaumanises the patient, the victim or the “perp”.

 

[GEddie]

I think one thing to be beware of is that while medical or cop humor can relieve the pressure the job entails it can probably reach the point where it dehaumanises the patient, the victim or the “perp”.

It does happen.

In the hanging of the Lincoln assassination conspirators, as the female culprit was lowered, her dislocated head slumped down and one of the soldiers was heard saying, “She makes a good bow.” He was at once reprimanded.

Also, as I understand it, surgical teams are told to watch their humor, as sometimes the patient can still hear and any insulting humor, though not consciously remembered, may affect their subsequent well being.

ICXC NIKA

 

[didymus]

It does happen.

In the hanging of the Lincoln assassination conspirators, as the female culprit was lowered, her dislocated head slumped down and one of the soldiers was heard saying, “She makes a good bow.” He was at once reprimanded.

Also, as I understand it, surgical teams are told to watch their humor, as sometimes the patient can still hear and any insulting humor, though not consciously remembered, may affect their subsequent well being.

ICXC NIKA

Or consciously.
I saw a special about comatose patients who recovered and one category is “locked in syndrome” [correct term?].
Anyway they can hear everything but can’t communicate. One fellow heard doctors telling his family he was brain dead and asking permission to “harvest” his organs.

Anyway, I’m far off topic. Like anything, humor can be a tool or a weapon, a blessing or a curse.