Bold message about loneliness. What do you think?

[Allegra]

My cousin’s wife (so I guess my cousin by marriage) is a popular Christian pop artist. She frequently posts messages on her professional facebook page regarding issues of faith, and they are all generally met by her fans with standard facebook afirmations of “yeah sista!” and “you are so beautiful” and other comments of that nature.

Last night, however, she posted a very bold statement which triggered an outright flame fest of negative responses. The comment she made was this, “If you are lonely at Christmas, then you have forgotten the reason for the season.”

For obvious reasons, this comment was seen by some as an attack on the faith of others coming from someone who has a wonderful husband, two beautiful little girls, and an enormous extended family herself. (Although her fans don’t nessesarily know that.) Now I think we all know that the idea of “God is all you need” is easier said than lived out. We all want human interaction and we experience the love and grace of God in others. On the other hand, there are many people who are surrounded by living, breathing human beings, with whom they could have a relationship, but remain isolated from others. (often due to mental illness, drug abuse, and overall poor relationship skills.) I think we could all easily pick out high profile examples of this case as well as individuals in our daily lives. If these individuals felt the presense of God at Christmastime, wouldn’t they be more likely to reach out to others and see the presence of God in those around them? It just a thought I had. What do you think?

 

[Julia_Mae]

On the other hand, there are many people who are surrounded by living, breathing human beings, with whom they could have a relationship, but remain isolated from others. (often due to mental illness, drug abuse, and overall poor relationship skills.) I think we could all easily pick out high profile examples of this case as well as individuals in our daily lives. If these individuals felt the presense of God at Christmastime, wouldn’t they be more likely to reach out to others and see the presence of God in those around them? It just a thought I had. What do you think?

I think you don’t have a very clear understanding of what mental illness does to people. I also think that you are forgetting the vast number of elderly, disabled and others who are literally *unable *to “reach out” to anyone.

I agree with the group: it was at least an insensitive comment. I hope she learns from her critics. Maybe it’s not people who are lonely who don’t understand the reason for the season.

 

[the_phoenix]

If you know someone who is lonely at Christmas, and do nothing about it, then you have forgotten the reason for the season.

~~ the phoenix

 

[misscath007]

If you know someone who is lonely at Christmas, and do nothing about it, then you have forgotten the reason for the season.

~~ the phoenix

I agree!

 

[ilySHJ]

If you know someone who is lonely at Christmas, and do nothing about it, then you have forgotten the reason for the season.

~~ the phoenix

2

… “If you are lonely at Christmas, then you have forgotten the reason for the season.” …

… there are many people who are surrounded by living, breathing human beings, with whom they could have a relationship, but remain isolated from others. (often due to mental illness, drug abuse, and overall poor relationship skills.) …

These three examples couldn’t begin to cover why a person might be lonely.

Supposedly every person experiences loneliness at one time or another.

Have you honestly never felt alone? Combine that feeling with being apart from family and friends at Christmas. Imagine the feelings of a person who’s lost loved ones. A joyful disposition doesn’t fill the empty places in ones life.

 

[Allegra]

2

These three examples couldn’t begin to cover why a person might be lonely.

Supposedly every person experiences loneliness at one time or another.

Have you honestly never felt alone? Combine that feeling with being apart from family and friends at Christmas. Imagine the feelings of a person who’s lost loved ones. A joyful disposition doesn’t fill the empty places in ones life.

I think I might be operating on a slightly different definition of loneliness. Certainly, I’ve missed people before. When I was away from home, I missed my family. I miss the loved ones who have passed. I have also felt alone before, but not because of the absense of others. At the time, my family and friends weren’t absent. I was upset over things that had happened and had isolated myself from others, thinking that no one could understand. I think of loneliness as a feeling of isolation and not simply missing other people who aren’t physically there. It isn’t required that a person actually be physically alone in order to be lonely. At least that is how I see it. It don’t think missing others is the kind of loneliness that my cousin was referring to. To me, grief and isolation are two completely different things, though I think that can both be caused by the same set of circumstances in many cases. While faith in the Christ Child won’t keep a person from being sad if someone has died or if they are away from their family members, I think faith certainly can help someone keep from feeling isolated. Even if they are far from family and friends, it can cause them to reach out to those who are around them. (And unless they are in a space station or on a desert island there has to be someone around!)

 

[Allegra]

If you know someone who is lonely at Christmas, and do nothing about it, then you have forgotten the reason for the season.

~~ the phoenix

While that’s certainly true. I would go further to say that if you know someone who is lonely the whole rest of the year and you do nothing about it except on Christmas, then you have forgotten the reason for the season.

 

[Allegra]

I think you don’t have a very clear understanding of what mental illness does to people. I also think that you are forgetting the vast number of elderly, disabled and others who are literally *unable *to “reach out” to anyone.

I agree with the group: it was at least an insensitive comment. I hope she learns from her critics. Maybe it’s not people who are lonely who don’t understand the reason for the season.

I actually have quite a vivid understanding of what mental illness does to people as I am very close to more than one mentally ill person in my family. Depending on how their treatment is going at the time, they could be completely surrounded by dozens of people throwing a party in their honor, and still feel as if no one cares about them, including God. I imagine my cousin’s wife probably had my family members in mind when she wrote that. When they are in the worst of their illness, they couldn’t see the love their family and friends have for them if they were attending a parade in their honor. Sadly, it is the same way with God’s love. Sometimes my brother literally can’t tolerate being in a Church because of it.

 

[MidnightSun12]

To quote Mother Angelica:

"[maybe] the people that are alone on Christmas are the only ones celebrating Christmas"

youtube.com/watch?v=mh99ZNV26Zg&list=UUijDos-LUTh9RQvSCMQqN6Q&index=3

"When my mother was alone, after I entered the monastary, she had two plates on her table, one for her and one for Jesus… In spirit He appreciated that she knew that it was His birthday and she celebrated His birthday… she would go accross the street to St. Peter’s and spend the entire afternoon in adoration… I wonder if she wasn’t one of the few who understood who’s birthday it was and spent the afternoon with Him."

I certainly don’t think that lonely people are necessarly missing the reason for the holiday!

Merry CHRISTmas everybody!