What is the difference between high self-esteem and arrogance?
A
healthy sense of self-worth is different from arrogance. Humility is the difference between the two. Arrogance, which is really pride, leads us to think we are better than others and even God. Humility is truth. The truth is we are sinful and imperfect. The truth is also that we are loved by God and worth so much that He became man, suffered, and died for us. We are sons and daughters of God. That means each of us deserve to be treated with respect and charity.
I think it is good to not always take things personally and take things people say with a grain of salt. It keeps you healthy. When does this attitude become unhealthy?
Sounds good to me. Just be willing to take an honest look at yourself if someone offers an opinion and not be overly suspicious of their intentions. This doesn’t mean they’re always right, but be open to the possibility they’re seeing something you don’t.
What is the the difference between low-self-esteem, vanity and self-pity?
None are good, and all 3 base the value of a human being on superficial or unrealistic things. Again, humility is the answer. Remember who you are and how God sees you. Regardless of how worthless we may judge ourselves to be, we are always valuable in God’s eyes. Literally worth dying for.
Again, it is good to be willing to listen to what others say and take their critiques to heart. It is good to see the reality that you are a sinner and your works are worthless in comparable to God. When does it does it become an issue of oversensitivity and touchiness?
It’s an issue if you wallow in self-pity and do nothing else. Be willing to hear what others say, and decide whether or not they have a point. If they do, think about how you can change for the better. It’s unhealthy to completely focus on how bad you are. It’s pointless when you think about it. Nothing good comes from constantly telling yourself how horrible you are if that’s all you do. Yes, most likely when it comes to sin, we will fall over and over again. God just asks us to keep trying our best.
It is good again to see this miserable for what it is. It is good to be aware of errors in yourself and the world around us. When does this become judgment and despair?
It’s only bad when we lose hope. One of the great things about our faith is that we have Hope in the Lord’s promise, regardless of how bad things seem during this life.
It is good to not judge others and not pay attention to sin, when does this become condoning sin or having a lax attitude?
We don’t judge the state of another’s soul or whether they are good or bad people, but we still see sin for what it is. However, prudence tells us that there are situations where we may be casting pearls before swine. My priest said that generally we should ask ourselves two questions. 1) Am I in a position to tell another what to do? 2) Is there a good chance of my action having a positive effect?
If the person is a relative or friend, perhaps say something once gently if you think they don’t know it’s a sin. But if they already know, it probably won’t do much good to say anymore. Just treat others with respect, and if asked for what you think, firmly and kindly tell them what the Church says regarding these issues.
If you feel not saying anything is being lax, pray for these people and the world. Sometimes our actions and words can’t change others, but believe that God hears our prayers and that they don’t go to waste [even if our prayers aren’t always answered in the way we’d like].
