Bringing your children up Catholic when you are not 100% about believing

[NaomiNoretta]

I am the Mother to two small boys who are 3 and 4. As a family we go to church regularly and pray together,I also read them Bible stories from their first bible My oldest child who is school age goes to a catholic primary school, and my youngest to a catholic nursery.

Me and my husband were both brought up catholic from devout families, however we both turned into lapsed Catholics in our teens. We married in a civil ceremony. We baptised our children when they were babies with the mentality of’ “just in case it is true” and for our families.

My husband does believe in the teachings of the bible and we are taking steps to come back to the church competlety. Such as going to talk to our parish priest about our marriage and confession.

However I just don’t believe as I should. I really try to believe but some of the stories in the bible I just cannot except a loving God would do. I do believe in God and try to live a good life, and this is one of the reasons I teach my children about God so that they know why it is wrong to do certain things. Am I doing right? Almost all of my family believes, and I see in my friends that were not brought up religious that they do not seem to have the same morals as me for example about having children outside of a marriage and abortion.

Any thoughts?

 

[rstegeman]

It sounds as though you just need to talk to a priest or deacon about this. You are a believer but have confusion over some of the stories. I was at one point teetering between belief and non-belief. I honestly believe that God led my girlfriend and I too meet. She was able to dispell a great number of my concerns and then got me going back to Church and got me very much re-energized about it all. With her being a devout Catholic, she sought out a parish and priest that were very spiritually oriented and close knit. I met with the parish priest and offered some of my questions and he was able to lay it out for me in a way that made sense.

I would highly suggest seeking out other devout Catholics and ask them about parishes and priests to see if they have any suggestions for you. Make an appointment with one of them and pose your questions to him. Keep doing it until you find one that provides and explanation that mends that break.

 

[noclevername]

I know you are already a Catholic but I would suggest going through RCIA classes. Seriously. I have learned so much!!! And I bet you would relearn a lot of things that I am sure you learned when you were younger but forgot.

Also, in my RCIA classes they spoke at great length about God and his actions that you are questioning. Hopefully they will talk about that in your classes too.

 

[jpm1977]

You seem most concerned about believing “stories” in the Bible. In this regard, I would point out that while Catholics believe the Bible is the inerrant word of God, that does not mean that Catholics believe the Bible is literally true in all respects. Many of the books of the Bible are written in different styles, including allegory, parables, prophecies, poems, songs, etc. Further, in ancient times, people used symbolism in a much more literal-sounding way than writers today would. For example, you need not believe Jonah literally lived in the belly of a whale or that God literally pulled a rib out of Adam to create Eve, or even in a literal Adam and Eve for that matter.

The Catholic church does not have a list of what is and is not literally true in the Bible, rather there is much leeway to take things literally or as symbolic passages. Some things are articles of faith though, like, for example, Jesus’ miracles and so on. But if what is holding you back is believing that God really created the universe in 6 literal, 24-hour days, you should not let that be an obstacle. As the Pope says, there can be no incompatibility between science–properly prerformed–and the faith, since God created the universe.

I would second the recommendation that you go through an RCIA program in its entirety and talk to a good priest or deacon. All of what I’ve told you came from my experience in RCIA, including readings works written by priests and monks of the Dominican, Jesuit and Franciscan orders that are approved by the Vatican as well as a teacher with a licensure to teach Catholic theology from the Vatican, so its not just my opinion.

In my opinion, however, the Catholic understanding of the Bible, together with the Church’s teachings, make the faith much more intellectually appealing that many fundamentalist denominations that use the literal, ‘sola scriptura’ approach. Given that many things in the Bible are flatly contradictory, you can’t take it all literally. Proper interpretation is what the role of the Church is in providing its teachings. A unified church teaching and interpretation of the Bible is one of the things that makes the Catholic church a unique and powerful faith, and the true faith, in my opinion. I hope this helps!

 

[OutinChgoburbs]

Naomi, nobody believes 100%. If it were a 100% deal, then it wouldn’t be belief, it would be Without A Doubt.We all have our moments of doubt, of confusion. The thing to do is make the choice.

Cut yourself some slack. See if you can go through RCIA, or get some basic Catholic books, either here at CAF or other places.

In the meantime, remember that in many mixed marriages, children are still raised Catholic. Your boys are fortunate, as they have 2 Catholic parents who are getting serious about their Faith.

 

[MamaZona]

I am the Mother to two small boys who are 3 and 4. As a family we go to church regularly and pray together,I also read them Bible stories from their first bible My oldest child who is school age goes to a catholic primary school, and my youngest to a catholic nursery.

Me and my husband were both brought up catholic from devout families, however we both turned into lapsed Catholics in our teens. We married in a civil ceremony. We baptised our children when they were babies with the mentality of’ “just in case it is true” and for our families.

My husband does believe in the teachings of the bible and we are taking steps to come back to the church competlety. Such as going to talk to our parish priest about our marriage and confession.

However I just don’t believe as I should. I really try to believe but some of the stories in the bible I just cannot except a loving God would do. I do believe in God and try to live a good life, and this is one of the reasons I teach my children about God so that they know why it is wrong to do certain things. Am I doing right? Almost all of my family believes, and I see in my friends that were not brought up religious that they do not seem to have the same morals as me for example about having children outside of a marriage and abortion.

Any thoughts?

Talk to a priest or pastoral minister you trust. I doubt there are many people that are 100% about believing 100% of the time. Even Mother Theresa was said to have had some moments.

Being Catholic/Christian for me is the continued effort to maintain a faithful search for that relationship with God, even when I’m not as certain of His presence as I ought to be.

You might want to familiarize yourself with some contemporary theologians who have worked on apologetics. Your priest should be able to direct you to some readings to help you along in your understanding of the Bible.

 

[jpm1977]

I would second those thoughts on doubt, too. We don’t all walk around like Stepford Wives in blissful fulfillment 100% of the time. Part of faith is contending with doubt. The great part about the Catholic faith is the huge amount of supportive people and information to help you through tough times of doubt. And on the other side, there are moments of sublime certainty that are hugely rewarding!