Brother against Brother

[On_my_way]

leschornmom:

Thanks for the tip I have heard that martial art can be good for discipline. (I’ve never had a problem with a child not having any self control before now, so I don’t know through expiriene) I do have two issues with this solution though. The first is finances. We have tight buget and I have a strict rule that if they can’t all do something none of them can. Unfortunately, I just can’t sqeeze classes for all of them right now.
My other problem would be that I would be afraid of what my 4yr-old could do with just enough knowledge about martial arts to REALLY hurt some one. Do they teach the self control part first?

Martial Arts is all about self control and respect. Your child will learn that when you learn a discipline, lets take Tae Kwon Do for instance. You will learn the tenants of TKD which are and self-control is one of the tenants of TKD. If you are worried that a 4 year old will use any type of martial art for an offense, then something may be seriously wrong with the child. None of the students we have are unruley. They have never had any problems with parents and/or authority. Respect for authority is something that needs to be taught at a young age.

As for finance, try to find a school that has a family package. Our school lets parents train for free. Some schools are about, in Hawaii now, i’m not sure of other states, 50 to 70 dollars a month. You could probably make arrangments with the instructor. I have never turned any student away just because of a money issue. The children that we teach are more important than any money. The more students we turn away the more are on the streets learning the wrong way. Call around someone will be able to help you out.

 

[Convert68]

If they fight, no matter who started it for whatever reason, they BOTH get a privelege or favorite toy taken away. They need to learn how to resolve conflict without violence.

With all due respect that’s terrible advice. My sons (ages 23, 20, 19) are still mad at the all women-teacher Catholic elementary school they attended for a policy that in effect followed your advice. It offends their sense of justice to get punished for defending yourself and also to get the same punishment as the aggressor. Women expect the men in their lives (and also the government through the military and police) to physically stand between them and agressors. Boys need to be taught two things: that it’s their responsibility (actually everybody’s) to protect those weaker than themselves and to never use physical force except as a last resort. We all recognize that physical force is sometimes necessary - otherwise we should dispense with all our laws. A valuable lesson can be taught here as to when force is justified and when not (most of the time). Find out what the issues are and who is the aggressor and punish him. Teaching pacifism is profoundly immoral because it means standing by and letting the most violent and aggressive among us get their way.

 

[Convert68]

If they fight, no matter who started it for whatever reason, they BOTH get a privelege or favorite toy taken away. They need to learn how to resolve conflict without violence.

With all due respect that’s terrible advice. My sons (ages 23, 20, 19) are still mad at the all women-teacher Catholic elementary school they attended for a policy that in effect followed your advice. It offends their sense of justice to get punished for defending yourself and also to get the same punishment as the aggressor. Women expect the men in their lives (and also the government through the military and police) to physically stand between them and agressors. Boys need to be taught two things: that it’s their responsibility (actually everybody’s) to protect those weaker than themselves and to never use physical force except as a last resort. We all recognize that physical force is sometimes necessary - otherwise we should dispense with all our laws. A valuable lesson can be taught here as to when force is justified and when not (most of the time). Find out what the issues are and who is the aggressor and punish him. Teaching pacifism is profoundly immoral because it means standing by and letting the most violent and aggressive among us get their way.