Building each other up

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The reading from Romans 14 this morning from the LOTH was a wonderful reminder to me of what we’re supposed to be all about.

17 For the kingdom of God is not a matter of food and drink, but of righteousness, peace, and joy in the holy Spirit;
18 whoever serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and approved by others.
19 Let us then pursue what leads to peace and to building up one another.

It gets so disheartening at times listening to all the legalism and focus on each other’s faults when the truth is that exactly the opposite should be happening. It makes me that much more grateful for those who do actually live in joy and who just don’t see the need to waste time judging where others are on their journey.

We have a tendency to be joyful and to do the right thing when those around us are doing so, just as we have a tendency to become defensive and judgmental when those around us are doing so.

We really do have a choice. As my beloved St. Francis said: “Preach the gospel always; use words if necessary.”

Peace,
 
John, I can’t tell you how much this thread lifted my heart! It brought tears to my eyes (happy tears!). Thank you so much… for sharing it.

God bless you.
MV :thankyou:
 
Our joy and peace and our righteousness is in Christ Jesus; therefore, we can be joyful and peaceful and righteous at all times, if we truly will to.

Since the Kingdom of joy, peace, and righteousness is in Christ, and Christ reigns in the just heart, we must build up the Kingdom of God in one another through spiritual and corporal works of charity and mercy.
 
John, I can’t tell you how much this thread lifted my heart! It brought tears to my eyes (happy tears!). Thank you so much… for sharing it.

God bless you.
MV :thankyou:
That’s pretty much the way it hit me too, MarieVeronica. I get so worn down at times by the level of acrimony around here. Even in the spirituality forum, where one should be able to come “on retreat”, it isn’t always safe from the bickering and contentiousness.

Peace be with you!
 
Our joy and peace and our righteousness is in Christ Jesus; therefore, we can be joyful and peaceful and righteous at all times, if we truly will to.

Since the Kingdom of joy, peace, and righteousness is in Christ, and Christ reigns in the just heart, we must build up the Kingdom of God in one another through spiritual and corporal works of charity and mercy.
You’re totally right of course, but at times it hard not to get caught up in what’s going on around you. It reminds me of the old saying that when you’re up to your behind in alligators it’s sometimes hard to remember that you’re there to drain the swamp.

It’s amazing the way you can come here to refresh your soul and instead end up with a near occasion of sin to contend with.
 
Building each other up is so important. Encourage, not discourage, praise, not criticize, be understanding, not suspicious, be patient, not petty, be forgiving, not condemning, be open minded, not narrow minded, give a pat on the back, not a pull on the leg ……

If we don’t always put “self” first, the situation will improve.

Thank you John, for this good thread.
 
Hi InLight, it’s good to run into you again. I couldn’t agree with you more that simply remembering to even consider the needs of others ahead of our own will improve the situation.

I ran into this verse from the letter of St. James this morning and it reminded me again of how important it is to stop judging where others are along the way, for we all fall so short ourselves and have similarly failed along our own journeys.

11 Do not speak evil of one another, brothers. Whoever speaks evil of a brother or judges his brother speaks evil of the law and judges the law. If you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.
12 There is one lawgiver and judge who is able to save or to destroy. Who then are you to judge your neighbor?

Yet we are so prone to set ourselves up as judges and then put stumbling blocks and burdens before our brothers and sisters. Rather than “making straight the way of the Lord” we set up toll booths and give them hoops to jump through rather than being Good Samaritans to bind up their wounds and lead them home.

I’m hoping for a more reflective Lent that will allow me to start concentrating on being productive in helping God’s wounded sheep find His pasture rather than pushing people out.

Peace,
 
The reading from Romans 14 this morning from the LOTH was a wonderful reminder to me of what we’re supposed to be all about.

17 For the kingdom of God is not a matter of food and drink, but of righteousness, peace, and joy in the holy Spirit;
18 whoever serves Christ in this way is pleasing to God and approved by others.
19 Let us then pursue what leads to peace and to building up one another.

It gets so disheartening at times listening to all the legalism and focus on each other’s faults when the truth is that exactly the opposite should be happening. It makes me that much more grateful for those who do actually live in joy and who just don’t see the need to waste time judging where others are on their journey.

We have a tendency to be joyful and to do the right thing when those around us are doing so, just as we have a tendency to become defensive and judgmental when those around us are doing so.

We really do have a choice. As my beloved St. Francis said: “Preach the gospel always; use words if necessary.”

Peace,
It’s very nice. I find so many people judge me very harshly when they don’t have a clue what my intention or even what the reality is and often it really annoys me. But at least I learned how other people will feel if I treat them this way. In heaven there will be none of this, no sin, no pain or suffering, just perfect bliss and peace where we rejoice in the Lord praising him with the angels eternally. We don’t have to put up with this world forever thank God.
 
11 Do not speak evil of one another, brothers. Whoever speaks evil of a brother or judges his brother speaks evil of the law and judges the law. If you judge the law, you are not a doer of the law but a judge.
12 There is one lawgiver and judge who is able to save or to destroy. Who then are you to judge your neighbor?

Yet we are so prone to set ourselves up as judges and then put stumbling blocks and burdens before our brothers and sisters. Rather than “making straight the way of the Lord” we set up toll booths and give them hoops to jump through rather than being Good Samaritans to bind up their wounds and lead them home.

I’m hoping for a more reflective Lent that will allow me to start concentrating on being productive in helping God’s wounded sheep find His pasture rather than pushing people out.

Peace,
Hi, John, well said! Good to see you online too.
Self-righteousness is in the fallen human nature for all of us. Therefore, on our road of working toward holiness,it is so important to remind ourselves not to judge. Not only not to express our judgments verbally, but also not to have judgmental thoughts in our hearts . This is not easy. For me, I don’t have problem for the former, but I need to make efforts for the latter. One way I find it helpful is as soon as I realize my thoughts tend to be judgmental, I quickly ask God to govern my heart. Along with confession, hopefully this virtue will be realized.
 
It’s very nice. I find so many people judge me very harshly when they don’t have a clue what my intention or even what the reality is and often it really annoys me.
I think our Internet Age makes this especially prevalent, where people take single thoughts or posts and make judgments about people without having a clue as to the rest of who they are.

I think it is also especially true because of this rat race, “sound bite” world we live in. We’re so rushed that we force ourselves to compartmentalize anything and everything. We take whatever sound bite we have to work with and categorize the subject matter on the spot. Everybody in their box, whether it fits or not.

It’s no wonder that so few have time for God. He seldom speaks loudly enough to even make a sound bite so I fear that most of us forget He’s even there.
 
Not only not to express our judgments verbally, but also not to have judgmental thoughts in our hearts . This is not easy. For me, I don’t have problem for the former, but I need to make efforts for the latter. One way I find it helpful is as soon as I realize my thoughts tend to be judgmental, I quickly ask God to govern my heart. Along with confession, hopefully this virtue will be realized.
I’ve gotten better about holding back expression of such things, though I can still be pulled in far too often when my itty bitty ego gets wounded.

If you really find a way though to keep that automatic response from even occurring, please let me know the secret. I find it to be so in my hardwiring from previous experiences that I can’t imagine a state where I didn’t have it happen. Somehow I’m sure though that if that temptation disappears that some new one will find me while my pride is basking in its accomplishment. :rolleyes:
 
I think a wonderful Lenten resolution would be to
  1. daily pray for the grace to see others through the eyes of God
  2. ask the Holy Spirit to use my mouth and fingers to build up another Christian
  3. refrain from any critical or negative conversation.
I, myself, urgently need to go to confession because last week I told a story at a party that got a lot of laughs at the expense of another. I’m so ashamed of myself.

I think I will adopt these resolutions for myself this Lent.
 
I think a wonderful Lenten resolution would be to
  1. daily pray for the grace to see others through the eyes of God
  2. ask the Holy Spirit to use my mouth and fingers to build up another Christian
  3. refrain from any critical or negative conversation.
I, myself, urgently need to go to confession because last week I told a story at a party that got a lot of laughs at the expense of another. I’m so ashamed of myself.

I think I will adopt these resolutions for myself this Lent.
Those are excellent suggestions leonie. That is fasting in a positive sense: the idea of fasting from a vice while pursuing a virtue. 👍
 
If you really find a way though to keep that automatic response from even occurring, please let me know the secret. I find it to be so in my hardwiring from previous experiences that I can’t imagine a state where I didn’t have it happen. Somehow I’m sure though that if that temptation disappears that some new one will find me while my pride is basking in its accomplishment. :rolleyes:
John, I totally agree this is not an easy thing. We all have our egos. It is a given.
But ever since I was resolved to work toward holiness, got myself a spiritual director, and engaged in regular frequent confessions, I have learned to better control myself. This does not mean I am not expressing my different opinions any more. It means I do my best to express my opinions in a gentle way. It also means I have learned to wait before responding.

I remember when I first joined CAF, I could quickly reply to some post I strongly disagree with without watching my tone. I also remember I had to bring such incident to confession. Then I learned to hold myself, to be careful, to know when to stop, and also to ignore.

Now it gets to the part I was talking about what happened in heart. Once I read a poster’s thread and what she repeatedly said made me so disgusted. I was actually feeling upset. I did not respond. But I mentioned to my husband and commented the person should be strangled by saying what she said. Of course, this again was brought to confession. My spiritual director said,“ You have given that person way too much power.” Ever since then I don’t be bothered by such things any more. I decided not to give people too much power to make me fall. I avoid reading certain people’s post, or as soon as I read and feel the nonsense, I don’t reopen that thread again.

How can I quickly overcome? I can only say it is by God’s grace. And like you mentioned, there are always new things to work on. Reaching holiness is a process. Saints are not made in one day. But as long as we are willing and trying, I believe we will get there, someday.
 
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