Burial outfit for the deceased

[Horton]

I don’t care what I wear as I plan to be cremated. Wearing nothing would be fine. I don’t plan on having a viewing. Just a rosary the evening before and a funeral Mass at my parish. I will then be interred at a local monastery.

 

[meltzerboy2]

A simple white shroud is the dress norm in Judaism. Men also may wear a yarmulke and/or tallit. Of course not all Jews abide by these customs; some are even cremated.

 

[Phemie]

I never saw anyone’s feet when in their coffin. The half of the lid was always down on the part that covers the feet. Who would know if the corpse was wearing shoes or not?

The only ones I’ve seen with the casket fully open were priests, and that only at their funeral or if they were waked within the church.

 

[Phemie]

When I started working at my present parish, shortly after arriving in town, I was made aware that Molly, the woman who had served as sacristan and general housekeeper for years, had bought her casket and it was stored in the furnace room, and later on in the attic. A few years later Molly was laid to rest in that blue casket.

 

[dochawk]

I told my wife to bury me in my regalia (tux, cape, baldric and chapeau)…my son can keep my sword.

Those are my instructions, as well . . .

When I asked a priest who worked with Catholic charities about donating semi-worn suits and shirts (at my size, I put elbow holes or serious wear long before most of the suit is gone, and I thought they might be useful for interviews, even though I can’t wear them as a lawyer while demanding my rates . . ), he mentioned that they could also be useful to give a man a dignified burial!

I hadn’t even thought of that possibility . . .

 

[Tis_Bearself]

We don’t have a lot of “chain” funeral directors in USA. The vast majority of funeral homes are small family businesses. Some of them have a local “chain” as in, they started with one funeral home and grew their business to own three or four homes in one particular city or area. They tend to buy their supplies like caskets and such from a handful of major suppliers so you are getting offered much the same thing wherever you go. You can of course buy some of the same items cheaper at an outlet store or wholesale if you know where to look.

The funeral director usually knows everything about the laws and how to request death certificates, coordinate things with the cemetery, coordinate things with the church, make sure all cemetery rules and fees are met, etc. It’s a very helpful service. I can’t imagine going to a chain for that kind of personal family service.

 

[jrgmercado]

Around here, the funeral homes seem to have areas/churches they work. I know that I’ve been surprised when I run into “Bob” at a parish where “Bill” normally is.

 

[DIERM]

This can’t possibly be true, can it?

If it is, kinda throws cremation as a Catholic option out the window…unless there is an appropriate inner lining for the urn before internment.

 

[mrsdizzyd]

My family is Protestant. We have always been asked to provide undergarments to the funeral home. If there is a religious let alone Catholic connection, I am unaware of it.

 

[mrsdizzyd]

My grandmother passed away this past January. She had a garment bag in the closet with the dress she wanted, all her undergarments and shoes. She coordinated her outfit with the one she buried my grandfather in when he died in 2006.

My grandmother was just as prepared. She told me what casket she wanted and she told my sister about the clothes. She hated drab funerals so she had a rose pink casket and wore her favorite lavender dress.

 

[PetraG]

If there is going to be an open casket, of course underwear are necessary, both for dignity and to make the clothing lay as it ought to. That doesn’t have to be a bra for a woman, but some underclothing that will make the cloth lie as it should.

I don’t think anyone in the funeral profession anywhere would agree to burying someone with no covering at all, even if state law allows it. Having said that, “green” and “natural” burials are becoming more and more of a thing. If a certain manner of burial is something someone really wants–such as being buried in a shroud only–I would suggest contacting funeral homes in advance and getting an agreement in writing concerning whether they will do what is wanted. This is not the kind of research you want your loved ones to be stuck doing between your death and your burial.

 

[on_the_hill]

I think there used to be laws that prohibited an entity from owning more than one or two. At least, that’s what my grandfather said long ago. His brother owned a funeral home for a while.

 

[Canvas]

I will tell you what: I do not want a viewing, especially open casket. I actually want to have an official document for my family that would dictate no open casket under any circumstances. I have yet to see someone in an open casket that doesn’t look creepy and waxy. My father didn’t look right at all.

 

[PetraG]

I think there used to be laws that prohibited an entity from owning more than one or two. At least, that’s what my grandfather said long ago. His brother owned a funeral home for a while.

Excepting consumer protections, I have been told that burial law in the US is almost entirely covered by state law, so it varies from state to state. I would imagine the same applies to professional customs. If you want to know what is going to be required, ask the funeral homes. If it is important to you that they don’t say one thing and insist on doing another later, get it in writing.

 

[PetraG]

will tell you what: I do not want a viewing, especially open casket. I actually want to have an official document for my family that would dictate no open casket under any circumstances. I have yet to see someone in an open casket that doesn’t look creepy and waxy. My father didn’t look right at all.

I don’t want to be buried in make-up, so a viewing could be a bit grisly.
I’m interested in getting a casket from one of the monasteries that makes them, but I haven’t researched it yet.

 

[TheLittleLady]

Now, in the US, corporate entities are coming in to buy up family owned funeral homes. They keep the name that is locally owned, but, you will see the corporate name on their information. This does not mean that they are not staffed by caring professionals.

There are many resources to help you become an educated consumer when it comes to funerals and the laws. Order of the Good Death is a professional org/non profit that has a wealth of information.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

JanetF, I just wanted to offer my condolences on the recent loss of your mom. I meant to say that last night but was sleepy and forgot to post it.

 

[vern_humphrey]

Now, in the US, corporate entities are coming in to buy up family owned funeral homes. They keep the name that is locally owned, but, you will see the corporate name on their information. This does not mean that they are not staffed by caring professionals.

There are many resources to help you become an educated consumer when it comes to funerals and the laws. Order of the Good Death is a professional org/non profit that has a wealth of information.

In Arkansas, it’s the Roller Company – they add that to the original name when they take over a funeral home. So you have Roller-Kaufman, Roller-Crouch, and so on. The joke is somewhere there’s a funeral home named Roller-Skates and another one named Roller-Boller-Ball.

 

[Tis_Bearself]

That just made me laugh remembering the old Weird Al Yankovic movie “UHF” which contained a TV commercial for a local funeral home touting its “free salad bar”. I would def be leery of burying a loved one out of such a chain as you describe. To be honest I can’t imagine a funeral without using a nice local undertaker personally known in the community and probably also personally known to the pastor of the Catholic church. I would imagine that in UK there are many people who do not attend a church or deal with a church at all and that would open the door to a host of abuses from purely commercial providers.

 

[Loud-living-dogma]

I think those big chains are taking over a lot of local companies. Here they are “dignity”. So you get them renamed as Smith-Dignity, etc.
We also have a new Catholic funeral home. I feel like their prices ought to be lower but I don’t know if they are.