Called to Evangelize or Call it Quits?

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PussyCatJosie

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Hi Everyone!
I’m new to the forums; looking forward to hearing from others trying to make Christ the center of their lives. I’m also looking forward to your advice and prayers (if you will!)…

Now, most of this sounds like it should go under some sort of “relationship” forum rather than “evangelization” but it really isn’t about that…let me explain the deal…

Last semester, I met a guy friend in one of my college classes. We sort of clicked but neither of us really thought seriously about the other. One night, I had an absurd dream about him in which he was at my church and there was a guy following him around (I like to imagine it was his guardian angel) trying to convince him to go to confession. I laughed it off, told my family, and that was that. The guy wasn’t even Catholic, and I knew that.

After the semester was over, however, we found out our birthdays were a week apart, and he asked to take me out. We did go out a couple of times, and there was some chemistry there, but I was trying hard not to fall head over heals because I knew we were from very different backgrounds. I was praying profusely about the situation, and I especially did feel Mother Mary’s presence while praying for/about this guy. (Though I was never really sure what she wanted me to do!) I did know how much I wanted to evangelize him, how much I cared about him, and how much I wanted him to know Jesus!

After a little while, however, the guy and I ended up in something like an argument and we stopped talking to each other (I’ll spare the details). I won’t pretend that I handled the situation perfectly, but he definitely got pretty rude by the last time we talked. I prayed about it, and decided just to send him a note. Basically, I said nothing reproachful or accusing; just that I had enjoyed hanging out with him, I’ll be praying for him, and I’ll be wishing him well with his future.

Even though I “closed the book”, however,I guess I proved myself a sap for not being able to put him on the shelf and out of my mind. I kept feeling like I was suppose to have led him to Christ and I failed miserably.

I decided that even though I wasn’t going to talk to him, I should pray for him, so I started 40 days of fasting and prayer. I’m approaching the end of this now, and I had a funny idea. Problem is, I don’t know if it’s God wanting to work through me, or just me wishing that I could get back with this guy.

I’m going on a retreat at the end of the year. It’s 5 days with young adult Catholics. I’ve been the past 2 years and these retreats are really bringing me closer to God in an amazing way! It’s a group of about 75-80 people or so, some of the most amazing people I’ve ever met, and I have 10-15 friends from my area that I travel with.

I want so much to invite this guy to come with us, but I’m not sure if that would be really weird or not. First of all, I know he’s not Catholic; he probably won’t be into the idea…Secondly, would he just think that I’m trying to “spark up something” between us? Thirdly…am I just trying to “spark up something” between us? I’m not sure if this is God’s idea or mine.

So, should I try to evangelize or just let this guy go and trust that God will take care of him?

Thank you guys so much! 👍

In Christ,
-Josie
 
Good of you to be thinking of him.

Pardon me for suggesting a more indirect approach.
  • Is the relationship understood in the same way by both you? Friends, more than friends?
-I can’t remember too many relationships between females and males, that led to evangelization before something else either happened or got in the way and created obstacles.
  • Maybe just keep praying for him…that some his own gender befriends him and sets a good example, and leads him to know God through his virtuous life and friendship.
  • Sometimes our evangelization works through others.
Just some thoughts.
 
Thank you for your reply, Edward! 🙂

We were on the same level in that we were friends, open to a relationship.

To follow up on what you were saying regarding another evangelist of his own gender, this is one of my ongoing prayers! In fact, one of his best friends he introduced me to was Catholic. (I was most delighted when we went to his house to see the images of the Sacred and Immaculate hearts on the wall. I did not get a very long chance to talk to him, the Catholic friend, but when I did, he was the one that brought up religion, so I was very excited about this guy being one of my friend’s best friends :D)

Do you think I should invite him on the retreat, though? Honestly, my thought on this was that he will most likely say no, and consequently, I really don’t have anything to loose but my pride. What do you think?
 
I think it is in the hands of God. I would naturally keep on praying for him. Let God do his work. Please keep in mind, that as much as you may desire this friendship to go further, this may not be what God has planned for you. I would keep praying for the right person to come along and continue having faith in our Lord.:.
 
I think that instead of asking him to go to a long retreat you should ask him out to mass and then lunch one day. If he expresses any kind of interest in mass, feel free to invite him again. If he doesn’t feel like going, don’t push it. If he goes and doesn’t want to go again, don’t push it. You have to be gentle with these kind of things. You can’t just throw a person towards religion and hope that it sticks. You have to quietly guide them.

Don’t invite him to the retreat. It would be overwhelming for a non-Catholic to be “trapped” for five days with a faith that he doesn’t follow. I highly recommend a mass/lunch date. It is the only easy way to get him to your church and then get conversation about it afterwards.
 
Thanks so much, everyone!

I am in agreement. I absolutely hate the idea of throwing religion into someone’s face; my “style” of evangelization has always been a very gentle approach.

I am very encouraged with your responses. Yes, I know that I must do God’s will and not mine. I certainly don’t want to get in this guy’s face about religion nor would I want to get myself into any relationship against God’s plan.

This helps a lot…I will continue to pray for him. I feel strongly that his conversion is possible.
 
Introduce him to some of your male Chrisitan friends, and let them evangelize him while you pray.
 
PussyCatJosie said:
Thanks so much, everyone!

I am in agreement. I absolutely hate the idea of throwing religion into someone’s face; my “style” of evangelization has always been a very gentle approach.

I am very encouraged with your responses. Yes, I know that I must do God’s will and not mine. I certainly don’t want to get in this guy’s face about religion nor would I want to get myself into any relationship against God’s plan.

This helps a lot…I will continue to pray for him. I feel strongly that his conversion is possible.
Click to expand...
keep in mind that we as evangelist for Christ need to aim for a repenting heart in lieu of a decision for Christ.

take a look at this: evidencebible.com/witnessingtool/aimforrepentance.shtml

i pray for you josie and wish you well. God Bless and take care.
 
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