Can a Catholic baby have six godparents?

[bitterhope]

For the second time I have seen a baptism during Mass in which the baby had three married couples announced as godparents. These three couples all participated in the baptism and their children were all told that they were god siblings to the baby being baptized. Is it allowed for a baby to have six godparents? When I had my children baptized I was told they could have either one or two godparents, or one godparent and one witness. I was told that if you chose two, one must be male and the other female. I was also told that in the event the actual godparents could not attend the baptism, a proxy could stand in for them and that he/she or they would be noted as proxies on the certificate. In both the cases in which I witnessed the baptisms with six godparents, all six were present and active during the baptism. They all held the baptismal candle, all crossed the baby, all were called godparents by the priest. If this is not allowed, what, if anything, should be said about this? Who should be contacted?

 

[Gorgias]

For the second time I have seen a baptism during Mass in which the baby had three married couples announced as godparents.

Three couples may have stood up there… but only one pair of them are actually the godparents.

What ethnicity are we talking about, here? I know that there are some local traditions – which do not affect the Church’s rules on baptism – in which multiple couples ‘stand’ for the child.

These three couples all participated in the baptism and their children were all told that they were god siblings to the baby being baptized.

There’s no such thing as a ‘god sibling’. Somebody, thinking they were being pastoral, was making up stuff out of whole cloth…

When I had my children baptized I was told they could have either one or two godparents, or one godparent and one witness. I was told that if you chose two, one must be male and the other female. I was also told that in the event the actual godparents could not attend the baptism, a proxy could stand in for them and that he/she or they would be noted as proxies on the certificate.

You were informed correctly.

In both the cases in which I witnessed the baptisms with six godparents, all six were present and active during the baptism. They all held the baptismal candle, all crossed the baby, all were called godparents by the priest. If this is not allowed, what, if anything, should be said about this? Who should be contacted?

You could mention it to the priest, but he’ll likely shrug it off. You could report him, but that’s likely not to go anywhere, either. Nothing really ‘happened’, even if they said things that weren’t accurate. You might consider just saying a prayer for them, and just letting it go.

 

[bitterhope]

Thank you for your quick response. Our pastor would not be receptive of anything someone might say unless it is flattering to him. Thankfully I’m moving soon. The parish has really become an odd environment over the last 18 months or so. We have so many weird things happening that actually the baptisms are the least of my concerns at the moment. The difficult part for me is trying to teach my children that these things are not really allowed without making our priest seem bad to them. I want them to respect him, but when he begins Mass by saying that this baby is so lucky to have two parents, six godparents, two siblings and several god siblings, I don’t see how I can explain that it is not really possible without saying that Father is wrong about that. Like I said, I’m glad I’m moving soon. Hopefully our next duty station has a better parish, or at least a few parishes from which to choose. We are no where near another Catholic Church right now. The next closest is 45 mins away

 

[bitterhope]

And to answer your question about ethnicity–they are white Americans. It is not a local custom here at all. The parents are one convert, one non catholic. All the godparents are married catholic couples. Two couples are cradle Catholics, one couple went through RCIA the year before the parent that also converted.

The other baptism–all the godparents are cradle Catholics, parents are converts. Again, white Americans. Not a local custom. The only connection is that they all know each other well and some of the godparents are the same from both baptisms. Not sure I worded that clearly, but basically all the godparents and both sets of parents are well known at the parish and seem to pull a lot of weight around there.

Between the two baptisms, two sets of godparents are the same. One set of godparents is different, and the parents of one baby are two of the godparents of the other baby.

 

[Phemie]

As someone said above, it can be cultural. Our previous pastor told us that in his country it wasn’t unusual to have as many as a dozen “godparents” involved in the ceremony and in the life of the child. That doesn’t mean they were all recognized as such by the Church. But if they were all praying for the child…

Sometimes it’s very difficult to get parents to understand. Have you ever seen the glazed looks you get when you try to explain the difference between a godparent and a Christian witness to parents preparing for Baptism? You know that baby will always be told he/she has a godfather and a godmother regardless of the fact that the Church says he/she has only a godmother or only a godfather.

 

[bitterhope]

No, this isn’t cultural here. They are all white Americans born and bred. None have lived anywhere else, just here in the local area their entire lives.

 

[LaughingBoy1503]

As someone said above, it can be cultural. Our previous pastor told us that in his country it wasn’t unusual to have as many as a dozen “godparents” involved in the ceremony and in the life of the child. That doesn’t mean they were all recognized as such by the Church. But if they were all praying for the child…

Sometimes it’s very difficult to get parents to understand. Have you ever seen the glazed looks you get when you try to explain the difference between a godparent and a Christian witness to parents preparing for Baptism? You know that baby will always be told he/she has a godfather and a godmother regardless of the fact that the Church says he/she has only a godmother or only a godfather.

Indeed. I have one “godson” but… he was baptized before I was

I was a “Christian witness” to his baptism. I held him as he was Baptized. I was not Catholic at the time. I was not even technically a Christian at the time. I was simply a unbaptized protestant. But my friends asked me to be a “godparent” I told them to ask if it was okay since I was not Catholic and they told me that it was, so I went through with it. I think The Parish just assumed that I was Baptized, but I was not. I am assuming his godmother is a baptized Catholic. So, technically, I am not really his “godfather” in a way, I can be considered his godfather. I was there, I have since became Catholic and I am almost 100% certain that it is going to be me reminding his mother that she promised God she would raise him Catholic in about a year when he knows how to read and can be enrolled in his classes for first communion.

I wanted to say that when I heard 6 godparents, I kind of pictured a Hispanic family (That is not racist! I am Hispanic) I was surprised when I heard they were all white. I do not know why (still not racist!) but I was

 

[jmcrae]

For the second time I have seen a baptism during Mass in which the baby had three married couples announced as godparents. These three couples all participated in the baptism and their children were all told that they were god siblings to the baby being baptized. Is it allowed for a baby to have six godparents?

Technically, at least four of them, if not five, are witnesses. In our parish, in order to accommodate a variety of cultures, we allow as many people as want to, to stand up with the parents at the Baptism, but only the actual god parents are listed on the certificate.

When I had my children baptized I was told they could have either one or two godparents, or one godparent and one witness. I was told that if you chose two, one must be male and the other female.

This is correct.

I was also told that in the event the actual godparents could not attend the baptism, a proxy could stand in for them and that he/she or they would be noted as proxies on the certificate.

I’m not sure they would necessarily be listed on the certificate, but they would certainly be noted in the parish record.

In both the cases in which I witnessed the baptisms with six godparents, all six were present and active during the baptism. They all held the baptismal candle, all crossed the baby, all were called godparents by the priest. If this is not allowed, what, if anything, should be said about this? Who should be contacted?

I would let it go. There is no harm in people thinking they are god parents to a baby, even if technically they aren’t, really - especially if they have a zeal for the faith, and desire to share that zeal, together with the faith, with their “god child.”

it’s certainly preferable to the other common situation, of Catholic parents who are so far removed from their faith that they have no Catholic friends at all to call upon to stand up for their children at the time of Baptism.

 

[bitterhope]

Indeed. I have one “godson” but… he was baptized before I was

I was a “Christian witness” to his baptism. I held him as he was Baptized. I was not Catholic at the time. I was not even technically a Christian at the time. I was simply a unbaptized protestant. But my friends asked me to be a “godparent” I told them to ask if it was okay since I was not Catholic and they told me that it was, so I went through with it. I think The Parish just assumed that I was Baptized, but I was not. I am assuming his godmother is a baptized Catholic. So, technically, I am not really his “godfather” in a way, I can be considered his godfather. I was there, I have since became Catholic and I am almost 100% certain that it is going to be me reminding his mother that she promised God she would raise him Catholic in about a year when he knows how to read and can be enrolled in his classes for first communion.

I wanted to say that when I heard 6 godparents, I kind of pictured a Hispanic family (That is not racist! I am Hispanic) I was surprised when I heard they were all white. I do not know why (still not racist!) but I was

My husband is Mexican (born and raised in Veracruz) and he has never seen such a thing. I’m half white (American Indian and Irish) and was raised relatively close to where we currently live. It just doesn’t happen here, especially with white people. Witnesses are one thing, godparents are something else. My biggest concern is the way father stated at the beginning of Mass that these are all Godparents. My kids have had many questions about things father says, including these recent baptisms. If these things are not allowed and I tell my kids what the church actually teaches, that’s the same to the younger ones as saying father is bad because he lied (my kids are 2-16–the youngest 3 are the ones that take it as he’s bad). It’s very difficult to explain things like this so I tend not to unless they ask questions. Of course they ask about baptisms because they are so curious about their own. I have seen witnesses and they are not announced as godparents and the kids are announced as god siblings.

 

[Gorgias]

I’m not sure they would necessarily be listed on the certificate, but they would certainly be noted in the parish record.

Hmm… ya’ll would list all six in the little box for ‘godparents’ in the baptismal register?

 

[jmcrae]

Hmm… ya’ll would list all six in the little box for ‘godparents’ in the baptismal register?

No, we would not list six god parents in the parish register. There is room for two - one male, and one female.

I was referring to the proxies - we record the proxies in the parish register (if there are any) along with the names of the one or two god parents.

 

[Phemie]

Hmm… ya’ll would list all six in the little box for ‘godparents’ in the baptismal register?

I think she was referring to the “proxies.” We certainly list them in the register. I’m sure I could have fit 3 names in each box if I’d had to.

 

[pianistclare]

I would let it go. There is no harm in people thinking they are god parents to a baby, even if technically they aren’t, really - especially if they have a zeal for the faith, and desire to share that zeal, together with the faith, with their “god child.”

it’s certainly preferable to the other common situation, of Catholic parents who are so far removed from their faith that they have no Catholic friends at all to call upon to stand up for their children at the time of Baptism.

THIS^^^.
God bless all these people who loved this child that they ALL want to pray for him/her.
Let it go.

 

[Gorgias]

I was referring to the proxies - we record the proxies in the parish register (if there are any) along with the names of the one or two god parents.

LOL! That’ll teach me to post late at night! I looked back at your post and there it was – ‘proxies’!

 

[bitterhope]

Well, according to the CAF apologists this isn’t supposed to happen. That is exactly what I will pass on to my kids. No, a child cannot have six godparents or two godmothers or two godfathers. They only need one but if there are two there must be one male one female. There is no such thing as a god sibling. Yes, I’m glad they have people that love the babies but most other babies do as well without putting on a huge show about it during a sacrament. Everyone that is at the baptism is a Christian witness to it but should not bestowed with a false title of honor by the priest.

 

[SMHW]

I would let it go. There is no harm in people thinking they are god parents to a baby, even if technically they aren’t, really - especially if they have a zeal for the faith, and desire to share that zeal, together with the faith, with their “god child.”

I also agree with this.

Nobody is saying these people are *sponsors, *which is the official designation in English. Godparent is something of a fanciful word so let the people who care about this child enough to stand as witness to the baptism have their fanciful title.

If the parish provides a pretty commemorative baptismal “certificate” (some do; some don’t) with enough spaces for all the witnesses then they can all be included on that.

 

[bitterhope]

This is the same priest that refused a funeral for my twins when they were stillborn because they were “never alive to begin with,” so we had to have their funeral elsewhere. Thankfully my mom’s priest buried them for us. Like I said, things have been off about this parish for awhile now. I’m so glad we didn’t bury our babies here so I don’t mind moving again. My babies are buried where I will be someday anyway.

Sacraments and the Mass are important and it’s wrong to make such a big show of something that isn’t supposed to be happening. There’s too many things that keep happening that make it impossible for me to just let it go. I’m glad you all would be able to. That shows you all are better people than I am.

 

[pianistclare]

This is the same priest that refused a funeral for my twins when they were stillborn because they were “never alive to begin with,” so we had to have their funeral elsewhere. Thankfully my mom’s priest buried them for us. Like I said, things have been off about this parish for awhile now. I’m so glad we didn’t bury our babies here so I don’t mind moving again. My babies are buried where I will be someday anyway.

Sacraments and the Mass are important and it’s wrong to make such a big show of something that isn’t supposed to be happening. There’s too many things that keep happening that make it impossible for me to just let it go. I’m glad you all would be able to. That shows you all are better people than I am.

**I’m very sorry for your loss. **
Punishing others by attaching ill will on them because of past hurts won’t help you deal with it however.
Liturgy police are seldom heeded. That’s what people mean by “let it go”.
It’s not a matter of anyone being better.
I will pray for your continued healing and your search for a parish that meets your spiritual needs.
God bless.

 

[Gia_B]

There’s no such thing as a ‘god sibling’. Somebody, thinking they were being pastoral, was making up stuff out of whole cloth…

This is a bit off topic but . . . there was once totally such a thing as a god sibling. In the olden days, people were so close with their god siblings that they would share secrets with each other. They would gossip with their god sibs. That’s the origin of the word gossip.

 

[jmcrae]

This is a bit off topic but . . . there was once totally such a thing as a god sibling. In the olden days, people were so close with their god siblings that they would share secrets with each other. They would gossip with their god sibs. That’s the origin of the word gossip.

It’s only people under 25 who even use that word in conversation- at what point in history is this supposed to have taken place?