Can a husband forbid his wife to wear a swimsuit?

[cynthia]

What should a wife say to her husband if he won’t let her or her children wear bathing suits to a pool? The wife has to cover her shoulders, wear a shirt and pants to her knees while swimming. The young daughters, 9 and 11, have to wear long shorts over their swimsuits and sew a back to the swimsuit if it goes below or to the middle of the back. Of course the husband and son can wear whatever they want. Also he won’t let their 3-year-old baby run around for even a minute nude after having a bath. He yells, “Get some clothes on her now!” Isn’t there something wrong here? The children cover their faces when they see something on T.V. the slightest immodest too.

 

[Michelle_Arnold]

Are you the wife and is this your husband and children we are talking about? If not, and if the wife is amenable to her husband’s behavior, there is nothing you can do about the situation. In fact, assuming there is no abuse going on, interfering in another couple’s marriage, however well-intentioned, could be very problematic.

If you are asking on behalf of the wife who has expressly asked you to find out for her if her husband’s behavior is appropriate and, if not, what she should do, then I recommend suggesting to her that she talk to her husband about marital counseling or go by herself if he refuses to go with her. His concern for modesty is not the problem – although his standards do seem to be a bit over-the-top – but, assuming your report is accurate, the controlling and hypocritical behavior might be problematic.

If she is interested in finding a Catholic counselor in her area, the wife can seek a referral from the Pastoral Solutions Institute or from CatholicTherapists.com.