Can a permanent deacon become a priest if his wife dies?

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Our one permanent deacon that became a priest had been a deacon for over 20 years and was assigned to a priest for one-on-one training before he was ordained a priest. He was sent as pastor to a remote parish that he had served in for 20 years.He was up in years and unfortunately had health problems a little while after ordination. However, he continues to serve as an assistant in another parish, closer to medical facilities and his ministry is just what he can handle.
 
Allowing permamnent deacons (married or widowed) to become priests may, in the future, be an answer to the priest shortage. By the way, does anyone know if the Orthodox churches have the same problem that the Catholic Church has with the shortage of priests?
 
eichenb2 said:
Allowing permamnent deacons (married or widowed) to become priests may, in the future, be an answer to the priest shortage. By the way, does anyone know if the Orthodox churches have the same problem that the Catholic Church has with the shortage of priests?
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I believe that all Christian denominations are having such issues.

The call to the permanent diaconate is different than a call to the priesthood. To ignore this is to diminish the permanent diaconate to nothing more than the same as the transitional diaconate.
 
anlej said:
Wasn’t the Apostle Peter a married man? 🙂
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Yes he was, and there are married men ordained to the priesthood today. The Latin Church has a discipline against it but this is dispensed from on occasion for converting ministers.

The Byzantine Catholic Churches have the discipline of ordaining married men and they does so today.

All I was saying is that the call to be a deacon is not the same as the call to be a priest.
 
One cannot use different states as steps to another state. To do so diminishes the value of that particular state in life.

You do not become a permanent deacon, because you have a chance to become a priest if your wife dies before you do. In the case of a single man who becomes a deacon, because you can change your mind later and ask the bishop to ordain you a priest. The diaconate is an order within the Sacrament of Holy Orders. It is not a stepping stone.

Those who are called to the priesthood have to become deacons first, because the orders are sequential. This is a transitional deacon. He is just as much a deacon as the permanent deacon. But there is always the understanding that the diaconate is not his vocation.

This is like those people who believe that religious life is a step to the priesthood. They go around believing that a man who is a brother is one who did not qualify to be a priest or did not want to go all the way. Nothing can be further from the truth or offensive to the religious life.

Deacons, priests and religious are different callings that Christ makes to men. Some men receive more than one call and they respond to both.

That is why the Church says that you cannot lightly ordain deacons to the priesthood.

You cannot use the deacon as a quick fix to the shortage of priests, by ordaining them priests. Most deacons do not have a vocation to the priesthood. They’ll be the first to tell you that their vocation is the role of the deacon.

Also, canon law demands that a man who will be a priest do so freely. He cannot be persuaded by the bishop, his religious superior or the laity, just to fill in the blanks where there is a shortage of priests. That would make the ordination invalid.

The fact is that we don’t have a “real” shortage of priests. There are two new realities that we often fail to consider.
  1. There was a golden era in the priesthood from 1900 to 1960. The number of men who entered the seminary was the highest in the history of the Church. The number of men who enter today is more consistent with those numbers of the past.
  2. The world is bigger today than it was prior to the 1500s. The numbers required are greater. It’s not just a matter of less men entering. It’s also a matter of a larger world with a larger population. The number of men answering the call to become priests cannot seem to keep up with population growth and population distribution.
Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
 
JReducation said:
One cannot use different states as steps to another state. To do so diminishes the value of that particular state in life.

You do not become a permanent deacon, because you have a chance to become a priest if your wife dies before you do. In the case of a single man who becomes a deacon, because you can change your mind later and ask the bishop to ordain you a priest. The diaconate is an order within the Sacrament of Holy Orders. It is not a stepping stone.

Those who are called to the priesthood have to become deacons first, because the orders are sequential. This is a transitional deacon. He is just as much a deacon as the permanent deacon. But there is always the understanding that the diaconate is not his vocation.

This is like those people who believe that religious life is a step to the priesthood. They go around believing that a man who is a brother is one who did not qualify to be a priest or did not want to go all the way. Nothing can be further from the truth or offensive to the religious life.

Deacons, priests and religious are different callings that Christ makes to men. Some men receive more than one call and they respond to both.

That is why the Church says that you cannot lightly ordain deacons to the priesthood.

You cannot use the deacon as a quick fix to the shortage of priests, by ordaining them priests. Most deacons do not have a vocation to the priesthood. They’ll be the first to tell you that their vocation is the role of the deacon.

Also, canon law demands that a man who will be a priest do so freely. He cannot be persuaded by the bishop, his religious superior or the laity, just to fill in the blanks where there is a shortage of priests. That would make the ordination invalid.

The fact is that we don’t have a “real” shortage of priests. There are two new realities that we often fail to consider.
  1. There was a golden era in the priesthood from 1900 to 1960. The number of men who entered the seminary was the highest in the history of the Church. The number of men who enter today is more consistent with those numbers of the past.
  2. The world is bigger today than it was prior to the 1500s. The numbers required are greater. It’s not just a matter of less men entering. It’s also a matter of a larger world with a larger population. The number of men answering the call to become priests cannot seem to keep up with population growth and population distribution.
Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF 🙂
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*Dear Brother JR,
Code: 
    As usual you have managed to address the thread and bring it back on track. Your knowledge is vast and I pray for you daily for your health and your vocation. I do so hope that you might continue to share your knowledge and insights here with your many friends here...
                              Blessings of Peace and All  Good!*
 
There are many different considerations. I see from the positngs that there are rare exceptions made that permits a permanent deacon, widowed, to be ordained a priest.

The lose of a spouse is dramatic, and also unique to each person who goes through this. A married permanent deacon saw his vocation as a married deacon and fulfilled it as a husband and probably as a father. The drama and grief and the emptiness might for a while have a widowed deacon consider preisthood in part as a noble fulfillment of the emptiness he faces in the early stages of grief. Men nurture through the work they do and what they can produce to support others. A man in this situation with grown children out on their own might think that if he took on a “busier” life as a priest-pastor it could compensate for the hole in his life at the moment. He needs support from others in his parish circle, or other deacons, Bishop or from where ever to see how his role as deacon takes on a different aspect than when his wife was there supporting his role in what ever capasity she had during their years when he was deacon and husband.

So, although the change of vocation could be made from deacon to priest, it needs to be carefully thought out. I’m guessing that in most cases the original calling to be a permanet deacon is still there, but as with everything else connected with the lose of a spouse, lots of changes are taking place in his role as father (if he has children), as a person in general, as well as as a deacon.
 
Bro_Joshua said:
There are many different considerations. I see from the positngs that there are rare exceptions made that permits a permanent deacon, widowed, to be ordained a priest.

The lose of a spouse is dramatic, and also unique to each person who goes through this. A married permanent deacon saw his vocation as a married deacon and fulfilled it as a husband and probably as a father. The drama and grief and the emptiness might for a while have a widowed deacon consider preisthood in part as a noble fulfillment of the emptiness he faces in the early stages of grief. Men nurture through the work they do and what they can produce to support others. A man in this situation with grown children out on their own might think that if he took on a “busier” life as a priest-pastor it could compensate for the hole in his life at the moment. He needs support from others in his parish circle, or other deacons, Bishop or from where ever to see how his role as deacon takes on a different aspect than when his wife was there supporting his role in what ever capasity she had during their years when he was deacon and husband.

So, although the change of vocation could be made from deacon to priest, it needs to be carefully thought out. I’m guessing that in most cases the original calling to be a permanet deacon is still there, but as with everything else connected with the lose of a spouse, lots of changes are taking place in his role as father (if he has children), as a person in general, as well as as a deacon.
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Brother,

I believe that you have touched on a very relevant point. I am a widower. My wife, son and father were killed in an auto accident 16-years ago. I was left a widower with my two surviving children, a daughter who at the time was nine and a son who was four. Today my daughter is 25 and my son is 20.

It was years later that I embarked on a discernment process. After my children reached adulthood and become independent I entered the Franciscan Brothers of Penance, a young Franciscan congregation.

I believe that had I attempted to do so soon after the death of my family, it would not have had the same validity and the same meaning for me as it does today. Today I can celebrate my religious vocation with my adult children. In fact, my son and daughter were present at my solemn profession of perpetual vows and my son served as one of the witnesses to sign my profession document. The other was a professed brother. I made perpetual profession this March 2009.

My point is that any man who is mourning the loss of a spouse, the departure of children or struggling with empty nest, is not ready to make a commitment to the priesthood or to religious life. One must allow himself to go through the process. When one becomes actively engaged with life again, then one is ready for another commitment, be it the priesthood, religious life or a second marriage.

The psychological reasons that you present are valid reasons for discouraging a widowed deacon who may want to make a change in his life too quickly. I believe there is nothing wrong with a widowed deacon becoming a priest after he has gone through the mourning period and then the discernment period.

We have a brother in our community who is a permanent deacon. After his wife died he thought that he should become a priest. After careful discernment, his spiritual director suggested that he not become a priest, but that he become a religious. He has been a religious for several years and today he says that it is the best advice that anyone could give him. His desire to be a priest was exactly as you say, a desire to escape into the world of parish work, not a response to a call from Christ.

Fraternally,

Br. JR, OSF
 
Br JR
Eh, that is a powerful witness you gave. Thank you. What you said speaks to many aspects of vocation discernment. I think there are plenty of vocations out there who would greatly benefit from what you just wrote.
 
A deacon who’s wife dies might feel that after much prayer and soul searching he is really called to the priesthood. However, unless his bishop shares this feeling-he will remain a deacon.

Dcn tony
 
I’ve known several permanent deacons who have been widowed. One of them became a religious brother, two were ordained priests and the others have remained deacons.

Even if you want to become a religious, it’s the same as a diocesan priest. It’s up to the major superior whether you can make vows and also up to the major superior whether you have a vocation to the priesthood.

One sign of a vocation is the approval of the Church.

Fraternally,

Br, JR, OSF 🙂
 
sancte_joseph said:
ha…a widowed deacon who goes into the priesthood just seem to me like someone having there cake and eating it too:rolleyes:

If the deacon wants to be a priest then a question should be asked…

What was his REAL VOCATION!
To be married to someone or to the church as a priest:shrug:
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You seem to believe that there can be only one legitimate vocation per person per lifetime. I don’t believe that is true. I think both vocations can be legitimate. A man can be called early in life to a vocation of married life, which may or may not result in having children - he may also feel a call to the permanent deaconate, especially as children get older. If after being ordained as a permanent deacon, he becomes widowed. He may or may not receive yet another call to become ordained a priest. And that calling may not come immediately after being widowed, and frankly it should not come while his wife is alive, because if that is the case, I don’t think he’s truly living his marital vocation. The call to a vocation doesn’t come by text message at a certain age; they come when the time is right and it comes from God. And it generally requires a period of discernment. It seems rather unkind and dismissive to state it as you did.
 
Does a Deacon have to be widowed? What if his children are grown and moved out (financially independent). If he received permission from his wife and children would he be allowed to pursue priesthood?
 
sancte_joseph said:
byzcath

what i don’t get is what are you arguing about…that i set my own rules or something…tell me then…and like i said does it matter i would support a widowed deacon become a priest…but its a different matter when a “priest” (protestant minister) from another church such as episcopalian has a wife and wants to become a priest…that i think is loosening up the rules a bit to much…and furthermore i havn’t discussed the eastern church because…that part of the catholic church has different rules which are irreleventd if your talking about married priest…because its nothing new in the eastern church
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This aggravates me as well. I was discerning the Priesthood for a long time and was supposed to leave this month for seminary but got cold feet last minutes as I realized I can’t give up having my own family. It has changed my discernment. Maybe I’m not called to be a Priest. Maybe I’m called to be a Deacon? My spiritual director as well as two different Priests who know me, all seem to think I have a calling to the Priesthood. But I feel just as strongly called to marriage. It is possible that God is calling me to both vocations. It just pains me that I would have to leave my beloved Latin Rite to pursue both vocations (if God is calling me to both). He calls married men to be Priests in every other rite of the Church. I support Priestly celibacy and understand why it is in place. I understand it’s also a tradition (small t) and not dogmatic, meaning it can change. The only thing I strongly disagree with is why in the world we refuse our own Catholic laity who pursue Priesthood, we will not ordain married Catholic men. But we’ll let protestants who are married go on to be Priests? A protestant minister who is married should be limited to the laity or the Diaconate as well then. Otherwise it just seems we’re bending that tradition to the benefit of protestants and not our very own Catholics. Odds are if I keep feeling called to the Priesthood I’ll be leaving the Roman Rite and looking East 😦
 
sancte_joseph said:
NOTE i didn’t say a widowed deacon should not become a priest…i was just saying as i still do…what is his vocation a married deacon or a priest…would a such a widowed deacon have thought to become a priest if his wife was still alive…

basicly would he want to become a priest because his wife died or because it was his vocation all along or other???
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Who’s to say you can’t have two vocations? I know someone in formation to become a priest…currently a transistional deacon who was married, had kids…and later in life his wife died. As he was walking through the woods deciding what to do at one point…he said…Lord I will do whatever you want…even be a priest. And as soon as he said those words, he wanted to pull them back…probably because that’s when he knew.

Who are we to limit the Holy Spirit on the number of our vocations? I think people can get several calls. I myself had no desire to get married…but it was so strong. Been married about 25 years now…but still have a strong pull to the religious life. My vocation right now is what it is…but if my husband dies before me…my vocation would not be to get married again.
 
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