Can a person receive Communion even though she is not married by the Church?

[mtlopez]

I just received this question during our last Parent Meeting for their children’s First Communion:
“If my husband is divorced, can I still receive communion even though we are not married by the Church? (It’s my first marriage)”

 

[1ke]

I just received this question during our last Parent Meeting for their children’s First Communion:
“If my husband is divorced, can I still receive communion even though we are not married by the Church? (It’s my first marriage)”

No.

This person would need to approach their priest regarding their situation and steps to convalidate their marriage (which will include the investigation of nullity for the husband’s first marriage).

The priest will guide them on what they can do/should do regarding Reconciliation, sexual relations, abstaining from Communion, etc.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

I just received this question during our last Parent Meeting for their children’s First Communion:
“If my husband is divorced, can I still receive communion even though we are not married by the Church? (It’s my first marriage)”

NO!

“Nevertheless, the Bishops say that “they are in a situation of
incomplete ecclesial communion, and therefore cannot be admitted to Communion, as this sacrament is the expression of complete and visible ecclesial communion.””

 

[benedictgal]

In a word, no. Now this scenario is slightly different from what the OP noted, but, I believe that the concept is the same.

My grandmother divorced my grandfather when my dad was a small child. She remarried, but, didn’t go through an annulment. Nonetheless, she never stopped going to Mass and reared my dad and his half-sister in the Church. I never understood, growing up, why she never went to receive Holy Communion. Nonetheless, she made sure that all of us went to Mass whenever we visited.

It was not until my 8th grade Catholic school graduation Mass that I finalliy saw her get in line to receive Our Lord. My stepgrandfather also got in line. It was later that I learned what an annulment meant and why she finally decided to obtain one.

The bottom line is that a practicing Catholic must be in good standing (ie: free of morral sin) in order to receive Our Lord. Living in an invalid marriage presents a barrier to the Catholic and prevents him or her from receiving Holy Communion. Unless the Catholic party can secure a convalidation to rectify the situation, he or she must refrain from receiving Our Lord. Now, that does not remove the obligation to assist at Mass on Sundays and all Holy Days of Obligation. My grandma could not receive Our Lord for nearly 40+ years, but, that did not excuse her from going to Mass. In fact, it was through her that I really learned to love the liturgy, epsecially the Pashcal Triduum.

Just because one cannot receive Our Lord, that doesn’t remove the obligation to attend Mass.

 

[Tantum_ergo]

Handle it gently, OP, but be sure to handle it.

Somewhat on the order of “Right now you need to do X before you can receive” might come across in a more positive way.

“Right now, your husband needs to pursue a decree of nullity from his first marriage. While he does so, neither of you may receive communion but you are fully welcome at Mass and may make a ‘spiritual communion’ at every Mass. Remember, as a Catholic you are obligated to be married ‘in Church’ and that having to refrain from communion until this can occur is not something that is meant to be all punitive and mean; it is a natural consequence of your being in error in your current marital situation. Your priest is not condemning you as evil and you are not being unfairly ‘kept’ from something you ‘deserve’; you have made a particular choice and that choice needs to be rectified so that you are in a state of grace. Hopefully your husband will receive a decree in the next 12-18 months and at that point, you and he will meet with the priest to convalidate your marriage, at which point you will then be able to go to confession and then to receive the Eucharist from that point whenever you are in a state of grace. And God bless you!”

 

[Ruthie]

See this thread on AAA.

If you are married invalidly, but live as brother and sister - i.e. celibately - until your marriage is convalidated, you may receive the sacraments.

God bless,

Ruthie

 

[gmarie21]

See this thread on AAA.

If you are married invalidly, but live as brother and sister - i.e. celibately - until your marriage is convalidated, you may receive the sacraments.

God bless,

Ruthie

The only thing I would add is, that as a couple they MUST be under the spiritual direction of their priest regarding this so as to be accountable to living as brother and sister. A couple should NOT attempt this alone without spiritual direction. Yes, they should attempt this, but to be successful, they should be under the leadership and direction of their priest.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

See this thread on AAA.

If you are married invalidly, but live as brother and sister - i.e. celibately - until your marriage is convalidated, you may receive the sacraments.

God bless,

Ruthie

This applies only on an indivivual case by case basis and only if there are serious reasons why they cannot separate and live apart.

 

[jmcrae]

This applies only on an indivivual case by case basis and only if there are serious reasons why they cannot separate and live apart.

Exactly, because there is also the issue of scandal - others observing the situation have no way of knowing what’s going on - if she can say, “We are receiving guidance from Father so and so,” it goes a long way towards giving a good impression of the Church to other people.

In my case, I would answer the original question by saying, “This is something you need to discuss with Father in the privacy of his office at your earliest opportunity - would you like me to give him your number so that he can call you and arrange a suitable time for you to come in?” And then let Father take it from there.