Can a Priest show physical affection to comfort a parishioner?

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Tis_Bearself said:
However, if you yourself feel uncomfortable with a priest holding your hand, I would recommend that you go to confession behind the screen from now on.
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This is the best advice. It is best for both you and the priest
 
I was just concerned, I know Priests are just like you and me that’s why I wanted to check it was ok. However I have had another Priest tell three of my friends that he was attracted to them and interested in pursuing something with them.

Sometimes I think people fail to be empathetic to both parties, I was just wanting to clarify that this was ok.
I definitely won’t be posting a question here again.
For a catholic forum there is a lot let empathy than I expected.
 
It’d be really helpful to have another Priest give you objective advice on the matter. I strongly suspect that as with counsellors and therapists, physical comforting would be a no no in that environment. It is an environment of vulnerability for both parties and the strict rules reflect the risk of such a dynamic.
 
I’m sorry for what you’ve been through. Perhaps you can inform the priest of your aversion to physical touch? I doubt he’s likely to touch you again if you do.
 
Welcome to CAf @psalm_130 🙂 it’s lovely to have you here . I think your priest was just trying to show that he cares. I’ve had two priests in the last year hug me - one at confirmation and one when my mother passed away. They are just fellow Christians with a special mission. You were upset so there was all sorts going on for you emotionally. I am not sure if you are a new convert like me or a cradle catholic - if new convert be ready for the fact that catholics tend to me quite tactile in my experience ! I’m still getting used to it but it’s all good
 
psalm_130 said:
However I have had another Priest tell three of my friends that he was attracted to them and interested in pursuing something with them.
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This priest needs to be reported, if you haven’t already.

I am sorry that some priests act badly and cause people to be suspicious of all priests including the ones who are acting properly.
 
Hey bear 🙂 just wanna say I appreciate your wisdom and kindness on here
 
Always, but just know you are appreciated, you are our friend here and it’s ok to accept a compliment 😉
 
That’s why I’m asking to ensure it doesn’t become more than it is.
 
Exactly, and that’s what I’m used to, im just used to getting into these emotionally vulnerable situations with my therapist and assumed that it’s a similar deal with the confessional
 
You are meeting with God in the confessional. He’s working through the priest in ways you can’t see. The priest isn’t judging you or meeting you for therapy he’s ministering to you. Every time you go to confession God is there xx
 
why doubt his motive? seems to me he was just trying to comfort you, nothing wrong.
 
Please don´t be afraid of posting here later on.
Some people here are more straight forward than others.

Feel free to reach me at PM if you need to talk to someone.
 
If something is making you feel uncomfortable, that’s absolutely ok. This young priest will need to learn boundaries in this day and age. You also can stop the physical contact immediately.
You can choose to engage in confession face to face , or behind a screen, your rights and ability to stop the physical contact remain the same.

Take your hands away and continue with the confession. It’s fine to say to the Priest that this physical contact is stepping over your boundaries.
 
psalm_130 said:
Yeah because we do give each other a hug when we see each other because we’re friends. But I think I was just being cautious
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Okay, great! I don’t think you have anything to worry about. But I can totally understand why you might feel uncomfortable in this situation given what you said about your past experiences.
 
I believe that you felt uncomfortable because of the media frenzy about priests that is out there. I have several priests that I call my friends. I am a female. I have never felt uncomfortable and I have had lots of hugs by all of them. And, I have gone to confession with them as well.
That said, we live in a world filled with criticism about the Catholic Church and always taken completely out of context and sometimes exaggerated. If it made you uncomfortable, could it be because of all the negative media attention? That’s okay and please don’t feel an disrespect because I do not mean any disrespect. I have recently realized that God is LOVE-God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit. It does not mean the blow your mind kind of crazy love that we all feel in our lives at one point or another, but spiritual Love is beautiful and pure and holy, and oh so loving! I think in this time, in this world, with all the attacks on our Catholic Faith, because yes, there are attacks right now, and a war on Catholicism, we are all a little or a lot scared about what is appropriate. All is well! Believe me when I say that. It doesn’t sound romantic in any way. It sounds like he was comforting you and that is a beautiful thing! God bless you, Psalm_130!
 
You know your own boundaries better and that is perfectly respectable.
I, personally , do not like it when anybody holds my hands like that for a long time so I kind of make the gesture to move my hair from the eyes or something ( so as to free my hands…)because in general I know it is well meant. Yet, I feel trapped 🙂 when sb won t release my hands.
Welcome btw!!🍓 Here is a welcome snack!
 
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