Can a single man and a non related women live together?

[WilT]

I thought I had this figured out but I’m throwing this out anyways. Can a women have a man as a roommate or housemate and not be sexually attracted to them or fall into any temptations? Should a Catholic get involved in a home situation as this?:tsktsk:

 

[Kamaduck]

I thought I had this figured out but I’m throwing this out anyways. Can a women have a man as a roommate or housemate and not be sexually attracted to them or fall into any temptations? Should a Catholic get involved in a home situation as this?:tsktsk:

If you’re asking whether a male person and a female person could theoretically live together, alone, without being attracted to each other, then technically yes. Especially if one or both of them don’t experience OSA at all.

If you’re asking whether it’s ever a good idea in modern, developed nations… Probably not, if only because people might assume that they are involved with each other.

I would say it’s different if an unrelated male or female is living with a whole other family, though. Especially if their living space is mostly separate from the others in the family (like if they make monthly payments to live in someone else’s basement). That’s a different situation that I don’t think anyone would mistake for cohabitation, and something that some young people with few resources might have to do at some point. I know my parents lived in somebody else’s basement when they were first married, before they could get their own apartment. And I’ve got some college-age friends who live with their best friend’s family for months at a time. Everybody has boundaries and there are pretty much no problems (other than annoyance at so many people being in the house ).

Basically I’d say that in most situations it’s a bad idea (especially if people feel the need to ask about it), but there are circumstances where you can legitimately end up with an unrelated male and female living under the same roof. If it’s just the two of them, though, then they ought to find another place to stay if at all possible.

 

[Brendan_64]

Yes you can. House-sharing is common in places like London where rents are sky-high and unless you are earning a high wage you simply cannot afford to rent a place on your own.

I once shared a house with a single man and a single woman. He then moved out so it was just me sharing with the single woman.

It would be very clear to anybody observing us that we were not involved. We simply shared a living room and a kitchen. That was almost 3 decades ago, before I was married. Things like that are even more common nowadays as rents are even more unaffordable for single people.

 

[WilT]

very thorough Kamaduck and well thought out. Lifestyles and events are strong factors at times. Thanks Branden 64:thumbsup:

 

[BeingSaved]

I thought I had this figured out but I’m throwing this out anyways. Can a women have a man as a roommate or housemate and not be sexually attracted to them or fall into any temptations? Should a Catholic get involved in a home situation as this?:tsktsk:

no
there can be no attraction at the start, then attraction can begin for one or the other
then it is unequal and anger may begin if feelings are not reciprocated, and who knows one party may punish the other party,…

also from the appearance of it, it looks like a male and female are cohabiting without
marriage, however, if it is 4 or 5 adults sharing a house together, that is different, but still not without problems.

 

[Beryllos]

I thought I had this figured out but I’m throwing this out anyways. Can a women have a man as a roommate or housemate and not be sexually attracted to them or fall into any temptations? Should a Catholic get involved in a home situation as this?:tsktsk:

It is possible to live like that without sin. I have done it, way back when I was a poor graduate student and single. As other posters have pointed out, there are various ways it can go wrong, one of which is other people’s assumptions and gossip.

 

[Linusthe2nd]

I thought I had this figured out but I’m throwing this out anyways. Can a women have a man as a roommate or housemate and not be sexually attracted to them or fall into any temptations? Should a Catholic get involved in a home situation as this?:tsktsk:

No. At the very least it would be a source of grave scandal.

Linus2nd.

 

[Pat_Albertson]

Roommates, probably not a good idea. Housemates, particularly if they each have their own floor, probably not that much of a problem.

 

[Cackles]

I thought I had this figured out but I’m throwing this out anyways. Can a women have a man as a roommate or housemate and not be sexually attracted to them or fall into any temptations? Should a Catholic get involved in a home situation as this?:tsktsk:

Absolutely not.

 

[Brendan_64]

No. At the very least it would be a source of grave scandal.

Not necessarily, and in many places not very likely. In a city, people wouldn’t give your living arrangements a second thought, let alone be scandalised. It is quite commonplace for people to live in such an arrangement and people will not necessarily assume they are a couple. It is easy to spot a couple who are involved by how they interact with each other. Two people who are just sharing a property out of economic convenience or necessity is very commonplace. I would disagree that people would automatically assume the couple are romantically involved.

Although sharing the same bedroom as a room-mate would not be a wise idea at all.

 

[BlueEyedLady]

Yes you can. House-sharing is common in places like London where rents are sky-high and unless you are earning a high wage you simply cannot afford to rent a place on your own.

I once shared a house with a single man and a single woman. He then moved out so it was just me sharing with the single woman.

It would be very clear to anybody observing us that we were not involved. We simply shared a living room and a kitchen. That was almost 3 decades ago, before I was married. Things like that are even more common nowadays as rents are even more unaffordable for single people.

I did it too. Actually, the college I went to had co-ed student apartments for people who wanted opposite-sex roommates. I lived with my best (male) friend on campus for a year, and then we got a place off campus for another. It was a GREAT roommate situation, there was no attraction on either side, and no one ever got the wrong idea, at least not for long.

The only time it was an issue is when I started dating my now husband. I was upfront about the situation from the start and he was completely ok with it. However, most of his friends and acquaintances couldn’t believe that he would “let his girlfriend live with another man”. He shrugged it off because he got to know my roommate and be friends with him too.

 

[Bookcat]

Should a Catholic get involved in a home situation as this?

Such would be open to temptations, near occasions perhaps, scandal, confusion, not giving good example, a hendering Christian witness…etc…

So if someone came to me and asked if they ought to choose such a living situation I would say: no.

 

[Bookcat]

Should a Catholic get involved in a home situation as this?

Such would be open to temptations, near occasions perhaps, scandal, confusion, not giving good example, a hendering Christian witness…etc…

So if someone came to me and asked if they ought to choose such a living situation I would say: no.

 

[gh4]

Good friend of mine who is unmarried d/t divorce bought a home about 10 years ago. Found a gentleman to rent a bedroom and bath to help make the mortgage payments and electric etc. They were housemates for almost 10 years. He recently moved out to get married. They were friends, but there was no attraction there at any point during all those years.

So yes, it’s possible.

 

[Luvz2travel]

I would think without attraction would be the only way you could do it.