Can I be forgiven for having had an abortion?

[Scarlet2009]

Im new to this…Im Anglican but soon to become Catholic but Im haunted by something I did just months ago…I aborted my own baby at 7 weeks pregnant. If I could turn back the clock I would do anything to be carrying my beautiful baby that I truly believe was a little girl sent from god…I already have a little boy he is 8 months old. I had my little boy out of wedlock with my fiance but after having lost my faith for over 6 years, I did not see this as sinful. I do not agree with abortion and so I kept my baby and I love him with all my heart. when I found out I was pregnant again I didnt think I could cope with another child so soon after having a complicated pregnancy and post natal depression so I made the painful decision to have an abortion. I went to the clinic and I wil never forget sitting in the waiting room with 2 other women and listening to the radio when this quote was read out ‘anything living has a soul’. I ignored it, though now I believe it was God sending me a msg not to go ahead, that all life is sacred. Why didnt I listen??I went ahead with the traumatic experience of killing my own baby, of ending a life, of taking Gods power of which I had no rights to do. Int the months that have followed I am finding my faith again and I want to join the catholic church for many reasons along with my son and hope my partner who has no faith will support us in doing so. I have made the first step of contacting the preist and had a meeting with him and I will be attending my first mass on Sunday. I know that soon I will have to make a confession and Im terrifed. Im scared I cannot be forgiiven for what I did, that I will go to hell and more importantly Im scared where my baby girl is now?Is she in heaven wil I see her again?Please help me and pray for me. I pray every day but cannot find the words to ask for forgiveness, I am not worthy of it.
Please please help.
God bless

 

[Fr.Vincent_Serpa]

Dear friend,

If the Lord was willing to suffer and die for your sins, then He is quite capable of forgiving them. He created you from nothing. He can also make you whole. For some reason we tend to fear the wrong things. You didn’t fear having the abortion. Yet now you fear such a loving God. Love casts out all fear. Just reflect on what He was willing to endure because He loves you so much—and love Him back.

To become a Catholic, you cannot have sexual relations with someone with whom you are not married. That is a matter that will have to be resolved before entering the Catholic Church. Put yourself in the Lord’s hands and He will put you where He wants you. The fact that you want to become a Catholic is the result of His grace. He definitely has His hand on you.

I will send you a reflection on His Passion to help you pray each day. You are in my prayers. You can reach me on the “Ask an Apologist” forum privately be clicking on my name or email me at

vserpa@catholic.com or phone me at 619 387 7200.

Fr. Vincent Serpa, O.P.