Can I get an annulment if after 3 yrs my husband tells me he has been gay for 10 yrs?

[Worthy_Of_Love]

Can i get an annulment if after 3 yrs my husband tells me he has been gay for 10 yrs
I married someone i thought was really cool. We are both protestants. So im not sure protestants can even get ennuled through the catholic faith.
BUT after 3 1/2 years of marriage and two kids, my husband tells me that he doesnt want any more secrets and discloses to me that he has been gay since he was 15. He doesnt do it anymore, but still to me the fact stands…he IS gay.
I have left him, in 10 days the divorce will be final. But that isnt enough for me. I want to be rid of him and the best way i can see that happening is to say that i was never married “validly” to him at all. That is something that i feel is an abomination to God and i wont live with it.
So, is it possible for me to get an anullment? He lied to me from the beginning.
Desperate in Colorado,
Worthy Of Love

 

[Fr.Vincent_Serpa]

Dear Worthy,

Since neither of you is a Catholic, there isn’t much point in getting an annulment through the Catholic Church. You may be able to get a civil annulment. I don’t know. I don’t doubt that you are upset with your husband over his past sexual life. I can understand your feelings of betrayal and disgust. So you are determined to erase him from your life completely. But I advise you to let the dust settle and give your emotions some time to quiet down.

The reality is that he is still the father of your children and they have a need and a right to have their father in their lives. This matter is not all about you and how you feel. The fact that your husband is no longer active in the gay life-style should mean something. If he has repented and asked God for forgiveness, who are we to condemn him? We are all sinners. I know this is not what you want to read. But it is the truth.

The only solution to this problem will be found on your knees, reflecting on our crucified Savior. It is His love for you and your family that gives meaning to life. This goes for your husband as well. Spend time each day reflecting on His passion and all that He endured to make us all whole. No one—no one is beyond the healing power of His love. You all are in my prayers.

After entering this, I learned that it is indeed possible for non-Catholics to have their marriage annuled by the Catholic Church. Check with your local diocese.

Fr. Vincent Serpa, O.P.