Can I properly discern with depression?

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ineedofmercy

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Depression makes just want to die in a state of grace (hard because of addiction)
I just don’t want hell
I’m getting better at desiring God
But I just can’t make it it click
With this depression my mind is skewed

Everytime I love a girl I usually lose some of our friendship or just hurt from unrequited love
I could be a priest but I don’t feel I could do it especially with depression
I could be single or brother but if I’m just celibate how am I helping the priest shortages some have?

I think maybe I should just focus on fixing my problems but trying to give up my earthly desires when depression takes away my hope is hard

My question is can I properly trust my discerning?
Depression has negative effects on the brain
I’m currently heartbroken from a variety of things
I’m getting braver in my fight against porn but still fail

Do I just wait?
 
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No
I’m strongly against suicide and I don’t want my parents spending anymore on me (had some of the worst acne a man could have)

Besides I don’t wanna make it public because I can keep it under control

My friends do a good job but they have their own issues
 
Seeing a counselor has nothing to do with being suicidal. And if you’re depressed, you should see someone to help you manage it and to cope better. Posting these threads online like you’ve been is not really a healthy way to cope. It can just become a search for reassurance that will only make things worse.

Talk to your parents about it. Just that you’ve said you don’t want them to spend any more on you, as though a loving parental relationship is somehow based on the bottom line, shows that you could probably use a better perspective on things. Your other threads show this too.

You are in my prayers.

-Fr ACEGC
 
But I also just don’t really want their opinion of me to change
People were act careful around me when they don’t need to
I don’t want to have appointments with counseler especially if it isn’t that necessary

I just want to know if I can properly make any vocational choices in this state
Because I’m afraid of making the wrong choice
 
Wow. You sound exactly just like me. Except with the friends part. I am not decided on priesthood either, Im young and I kind of want to make a decision. Again Im stuck between the thought of having a wife, but who knows.

I get depressed on a daily basis, Im not perfect and Its kind of hard to be super commited to becoming a priest in these moments. I used to take medication and go to therapy, but I come to realize that the church is all I really need in terms of finding help, so I stopped going to therapy and stopped meds cold turkey. Prayer and trust in God keeps me going, God will take care of us. We shouldnt worry if we are happy or sad, we must give him thanks always.

I cant really offer any answers sorry about that, but you arent alone. Makes me kind of feel at ease when I read this thread, so relatable to me.
 
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ineedofmercy said:
I don’t want to have appointments with counseler especially if it isn’t that necessary

I just want to know if I can properly make any vocational choices in this state
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These statements contradict one another. You don’t want unnecessary appointments, but you recognize that you are in a “state” that could benefit from counseling.

You really need to seek this out. I promise you, it will help.
 
ineedofmercy said:
But I also just don’t really want their opinion of me to change
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I’ve been where you are and take medication to this day. Your statement above is really just the ego speaking. I know most intimately how you feel, but such thoughts are a tremendous roadblock. Seek professional help. Ask your doctor to refer you to someone.
 
You need to be healed before you can start any processes. If you don’t, there will be hiccups and roadblocks all along the way. Both you and the formators will end up losing patience with the situation.

Your first obedience is not only to God, but also to the body He gave you. Obviously, there is something amiss, and a simple pill may be all that’s necessary. Seek out a social worker or a psychologist. They will likely refer you to a psychiatrist because they can’t prescribe anti-depressants.

When did you start feeling this way, and was it a reaction to something?

Retain a local spiritual director. I know for a fact that once you tell him or her about this, they will tell you the same, as I’ve been there myself. My major depression was reactionary, and once I discovered the perp’s digits on my psyche, I was able to throw him off.

Blessings,
Mrs Cloisters OP
Lay Dominican
http://cloisters.tripod.com/
http://cloisters.tripod.com/charity/
http://cloisters.tripod.com/holyangels/id9.html/
 
ineedofmercy said:
Because I’m afraid of making the wrong choice
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I understand not wanting to seek help, because you feel you can handle it, until you can’t. I thought I could handle my depression, and never thought about suicide until I decided to do it. God intervened and saved me, and my priest guided me to see my doctor who prescribed an antidepressant and counseling for me. It turned around my life. We can’t fight it ourselves and we might not be okay without help. God provides us with people and medicines (under doctor supervision) to help us. Please get help. God Bless
 
If you truly have depression, you need medical and/or psychological help for this disease, the same as if you had cancer you would need medical treatment for it.

There should be low cost alternatives such as a counselor you can talk to initially to determine if you really have a problem. If you are in school, they may have resources to refer you to.
 
I fear hell too much to think about that right now
But would you treat a friend differently who normally acts all crazy and funny now that he’s very depressed and seeing therapist? It’s not their fault either but it just happens
They’re more careful about what they say around me
And telling everyone about this I’d likely break down and I don’t know how they would take it
The stress and embarrassment might make things worse before the help possibly makes it better

Also if I have depression attached to my mental health record
I will be restricted from doing things in future
I like shooting sports but I would never get to enjoy that hobby again
 
I’m homeschooled so I don’t really have that option
And my family while good Catholics don’t go to confession like at all
So when I got a Confession the priest said my situation is very difficult and complicated
 
I think it started when I realized I was addiction to porn after realizing it was a sin
I got paranoid and starting counting my years in purgatory as I failed to reach confession and kept falling into sin

Now when I go to confession most of the depression caused by sin is lightened
But other reasons now take its place
 
I think you need to get your priorities straightened out. Your health, mental and physical, is important. Embarrassment shouldn’t be an issue because medical records are kept private, and depression if treated shouldn’t keep you out of shooting sports. However, if untreated, I’d be more concerned.
 
ineedofmercy said:
But would you treat a friend differently who normally acts all crazy and funny now that he’s very depressed and seeing therapist? It’s not their fault either but it just happens
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I see a therapist and have been on medication. My friends were relieved that I was doing something about my mental state. They had known for longer than I had that I needed help processing my emotions.

The same is likely true for you. If your friends are your friend now with your untreated emotional challenges they will be your friend once you get the help you need.

You know you need help. Get help.
 
I could probably not rent or own a gun to use in that hobby in the future if I have a history of depression
It will also make the process harder at least

I know my mental health is important
But I’m comfortable not having my family know
Some of my friends know because at this age we sorta know what depression is and some even have it themselves

I don’t want things to change and
 
Heartbreak, bad acne (talking super rare case it’s a miracle I look presentable now), uncertainty about the future, not wanting to live a long life, wanting love,ect
 
ineedofmercy said:
Heartbreak, bad acne (talking super rare case it’s a miracle I look presentable now), uncertainty about the future, not wanting to live a long life, wanting love,ect
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In response to your original question (“Can I properly discern with depression?”), my answer is, yes, in principle you can. Some others here have recommended that you get some sort of treatment for your depression first, as a separate thing, and then considerer your vocation later. But discerning your vocation may well be the key to getting out of your depression. Besides, depressed or not, you’re mental state is simply where you are now, so that’s where you’ll have to start. Many recommend pills, but that’s not necessarily the answer. Same with counseling – and I understand your personal reasons for wanting to avoid that. If possible, it’s better to find your own way out of a depression. You’ve already written that you’re not suicidal, so as long as you’re not having any serious practical problems, spending some more time with your current feelings isn’t necessarily bad. You sound very young, so I’m assuming there is no practical need for you to get out of this in a hurry. Take your time, pray when you can. God bless.

P.S. The improvement of your acne is an important sign that you’re doing better mentally as well.
 
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