Can one adopt being single?

[vsedriver]

the church has no official position on this. Catholic adoption agencies prefer to find mom/dad homes first before turning to single parent homes but secular adoption agencies are not that strict.

However, I would recommend you apply to be a foster parent first. The experience will help you decide if permanent parenting is for you. Also, many people find their adoptive children through fostering.

 

[KBS]

However, I would recommend you apply to be a foster parent first. The experience will help you decide if permanent parenting is for you. Also, many people find their adoptive children through fostering

This is an incredibly useful and valid post - one that doesn’t always occur to folks who are laser focused on adopting.

Here is a link to a now closed discussion about our experience with adoption through foster care. (Not completely applicable for the OP as a single adopter but relevant to the way this thread is evolving.)

God does indeed move in mysterious ways!

 

[Theo520]

However, there are far more children available to adopt if one goes beyond the status of white infant; there are children of other races and children in the foster care system, and the number of parents willing to adopt a child of another race or in the foster care system is far, far short of the number of children needing adoption.

I don’t think this is true, plenty of parents are willing and able to adopt children of various color. The problem is most children in the foster system aren’t available for adoption, their bio parents haven’t released them for adoption or the state hasn’t made the decision for them.

 

[do_justly_love_mercy]

Kids deserve two parents, a mother and a father. Don’t adopt if you can’t provide that.

Easier said than done. What children need more than anything is a stable, loving home. If that cannot be provided by two people, better that it is provided by one than that the child ends up in institutional care or being moved around between different temporary homes for years. Also, single people can be great parents. It’s very hard work, and there are a lot of hoops to jump through. That in itself shows commitment.

 

[otjm]

I don’t think this is true, plenty of parents are willing and able to adopt children of various color. The problem is most children in the foster system aren’t available for adoption, their bio parents haven’t released them for adoption or the state hasn’t made the decision for them.

The facts say otherwise.

 

[Theo520]

The facts say otherwise.

source please, you said you have facts.

My quick google indicates we have >430k kids in foster care and about only 25% are permanently seperated from their families and thus available for adoption. Ergo, most kids in the system are not available.

 

[otjm]

My quick google indicates we have >430k kids in foster care and about only 25% are permanently separated from their families and thus available for adoption. Ergo, most kids in the system are not available.

You missed the point.

I will repeat myself:

However, there are far more children available to adopt if one goes beyond the status of white infant; there are children of other races and children in the foster care system, and the number of parents willing to adopt a child of another race or in the foster care system is far, far short of the number of children needing adoption.

Yes, there is a plethora of children to adopt - @100k kids is a plethora in my book.

And adoptive parents by and large are not willing to take on a baby with FAS, or one who is addicted to whatever the mother was addicted to.

Nor are there waiting lines of parents who want to adopt a child who have been emotionally and/or physically abused.

There are plenty of kids.

There are plenty of adoptive parents.

The latter as a whole is not interested in the former.

And people may stand in judgement of the latter, but raising a child who has been abused, or who is of a different race adds more issues to raising a child - which most parents would concede is difficult at its best.

 

[Nepperhan]

After a priest adopted two children (with the cardinal’s knowledge) I don’t think we can say that the Church is against single parent adoption. At base, even a sole parent is better than state foster care.

 

[Swiftdove]

buhhht neither is sitting in an orphanage ran as a school, never having a parent-child relationship and aging out of that same orphanage… I think if one single person is being called to adoption, it is good. I think it is what our Lord would do.

 

[Lea101]

When i worked in the foster care system for a while I learnt that they only allow married couples.

It’s usually because they want a child to grow up in a strong family unit, without having to constantly meet “Daddy’s/Mommy’s special friend”. Also if they allowed single people, they will naturally favour single women than men and that opens up a difficult conversation.

I get that reasoning, but i have seen so many lovely single women who are willing to foster/adopt but can’t. And we are left asking existing couples if they are willing to take up one or two more children. It’s a tough issue for sure.