Can they get married?

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barboza21

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My mom’s neighbors want to get married but I’m not sure if they can. They asked us since they are confused and dont know what to do. Now I dont know what to tell them. The thing is the girl is catholic but the guy is not. they have a child and want to baptise and then marry in the church. But the guy does not want to convert. The thing is he has a warrant on him for something he didnt do. He says they accused him and he got scared and ran and that he is now under an alias. They are afraid that if they get married using his real name the government will find him somehow and arrest him and all. So they were wondering if the government gets that information from the church to where they could find out if they get married. Also, he kinda has a past that he doesn’t want to tell the priest about… :dts: idk about that… i dont think its a good idea. i tell them that the priest wont judge and as long as they are ready for marriage it wont be a problem. but he wants to keep it from the priest and the deacon. basically, lie. would the marriage be valid? I really dont know what to tell them, its kind of a sticky situation.
Any advice on what I can tell them?
 
The best advice you can give the couple is to tell the priest the truth and go a step at a time. And, of course to encourage this person to resolve his legal issues. Of course, my advice would be for this woman to rethink marrying a non-religious person who is on the lam from the police for something he supposedly “didn’t do”. Pardon my skepticism but how likely is that? Not very.

To answer the specific elements of the question(s) asked:
  1. Yes, a Catholic can marry a non-Catholic. It requires premarital preparation in the Church and permission for a mixed marriage (if he’s baptized) or dispensation from disparity of cult (if he’s not).
  2. Having a child together outside marriage is not an impediment to getting married.
  3. He does not have to become a Catholic.
  4. To marry in the Church, the couple must have a valid civil marriage license. So, this whole “alias” thing is not very likely to work out. Unless of course he has forged a Social Security Number and identification papers, in which case he has gone from “didn’t do anything” to “numerous federal crimes”.
  5. The priest will not marry them without a valid civil marriage license. Attempting to marry under a false name is FRAUD and the Church will not participate in that and certainly it could impact the validity of the marriage.
These are invidivuals who have made some bad choices. Encourage them to start making better ones.
 
1ke said:
The best advice you can give the couple is to tell the priest the truth and go a step at a time. And, of course to encourage this person to resolve his legal issues. Of course, my advice would be for this woman to rethink marrying a non-religious person who is on the lam from the police for something he supposedly “didn’t do”. Pardon my skepticism but how likely is that? Not very.

To answer the specific elements of the question(s) asked:
  1. Yes, a Catholic can marry a non-Catholic. It requires premarital preparation in the Church and permission for a mixed marriage (if he’s baptized) or dispensation from disparity of cult (if he’s not).
  2. Having a child together outside marriage is not an impediment to getting married.
  3. He does not have to become a Catholic.
  4. To marry in the Church, the couple must have a valid civil marriage license. So, this whole “alias” thing is not very likely to work out. Unless of course he has forged a Social Security Number and identification papers, in which case he has gone from “didn’t do anything” to “numerous federal crimes”.
  5. The priest will not marry them without a valid civil marriage license. Attempting to marry under a false name is FRAUD and the Church will not participate in that and certainly it could impact the validity of the marriage.
These are invidivuals who have made some bad choices. Encourage them to start making better ones.
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hey thanks! its good to know that information. Now at least i have some advice for them. ") I really hope they figure something out…
 
barboza21 said:
Any advice on what I can tell them?
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the best advice is for them to visit the lady’s parish priest and explain their situation. It is impossible to give any helpful meaningful advice here without knowing them as there is too much missing information.
 
The only things in this man’s past that would disqualify him are a previous wife still living or having taken a permanent vow of celibacy.

The Church requires couples wanting to marry to comply with the rules of the Church and the laws of the State. In US States, and most of Europe, that involves obtaining a marriage licence or certificate from the State - with the risk of discovery. Marriage is not valid under an alias although there are legal ways of changing your name. And there’s always Mexico;)
 
jimrob said:
The only things in this man’s past that would disqualify him are a previous wife still living or having taken a permanent vow of celibacy.

The Church requires couples wanting to marry to comply with the rules of the Church and the laws of the State. In US States, and most of Europe, that involves obtaining a marriage licence or certificate from the State - with the risk of discovery. Marriage is not valid under an alias although there are legal ways of changing your name. And there’s always Mexico;)
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Hahaha mexico… that’s true. My mom’s neighbor just informed me her parish said she doesnt need a civil marriage license. All they need to do is speak with the priest or deacon and set a date once he decides they are ready for marriage…? If he changes his name, they can find him though right?

Its a sad situation for them… they wish they had money for a good attourney to clear this mess. I guess God willing and they will find a way to get married.
 
If it’s something he is truly innocent of, the full investigation should reveal that. The young man should allow himself to be subjected to investigation so that can be determined. An innocent person should not have to live in hiding and fear.
 
1ke said:
  1. The priest will not marry them without a valid civil marriage license.
Click to expand...
This is not an absolute rule. Marriages can be granted in secret, if the two are properly disposed for marriage, and persecution or an unjust law prevents them from marrying civilly. In this country, I suspect that comes up most often for illegal aliens in certain states. Even then, I think the couple is usually whisked across the nearest state line so that the priest may preside over their marriage legally.

Anyway, such cases are few and far between. Certainly the priest will know what to do when he is approached with the facts, if that is a factor at all.
 
Digitonomy said:
This is not an absolute rule. Marriages can be granted in secret, if the two are properly disposed for marriage, and persecution or an unjust law prevents them from marrying civilly.
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We are not talking about a civil marriage. We are talking about someone with a warrant out for his arrest.
Digitonomy said:
In this country, I suspect that comes up most often for illegal aliens in certain states. Even then, I think the couple is usually whisked across the nearest state line so that the priest may preside over their marriage legally.
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Secret marriages were permitted where there were laws against interracial marriage. But, this situation is not such a case. There is no law preventing a civil marriage in this case.

Can. 1071 §1. Except in a case of necessity, a person is not to assist without the permission of the local ordinary at:

2/ a marriage which cannot be recognized or celebrated according to the norm of civil law;
 
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