Can we be married in the Catholic church without it being legal?

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mern1623

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My fiance and I are both eligible to be married in the Catholic church, but I am not able to be married legally because I would lose my health insurance. I am a widow, and receive a pension and health insurance from my late husband’s company. Since I have a pre-existing condition, it would be extremely expensive to have to switch to another insurance, and I have no pension plan of my own. My fiance is not able to support me financially, and he will be retiring soon and can go on Medicare, so insurance through his company is not an option. Is there any way we can be married in the Catholic church, but without it being legal? The company that provides my health insurance doesn’t refuse coverage to couples living together, but won’t continue coverage if the person remarries. I love my fiance very much, but feel that it is wrong to live together without being married.
 
Not in the City of Chicago. In order to marry you need a marriage license issued by the County. I would look into alternative health insurance. If you decide to live together without the benefit of marriage, you would lose the ability to receive the Holy Eucharist. To me that is a graver error. To risk losing receiving Jesus vs. health insurance. No contest in my eyes.
 
I am curious to see what the answers are in this thread.

I will say go talk to your priest and get some counseling. If a young man was unable to financially support his future wife after marriage, I have a feeling that they would be counseled to hold off until the financial concerns can be taken care of. I don’t think the counseling would be any different even for a “seasoned” couple. 🙂

Please talk to your priest and let us all know what he says.
 
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mern1623:
My fiance and I are both eligible to be married in the Catholic church, but I am not able to be married legally because I would lose my health insurance. I am a widow, and receive a pension and health insurance from my late husband’s company. Since I have a pre-existing condition, it would be extremely expensive to have to switch to another insurance, and I have no pension plan of my own. My fiance is not able to support me financially, and he will be retiring soon and can go on Medicare, so insurance through his company is not an option. Is there any way we can be married in the Catholic church, but without it being legal? The company that provides my health insurance doesn’t refuse coverage to couples living together, but won’t continue coverage if the person remarries. I love my fiance very much, but feel that it is wrong to live together without being married.

Mrs. mern1623,

You are between a rock and a hard place. I also would be interested in the Churches answer to your situation. Some of us may well be in your shoes at some point in our lives. Maybe a canon lawyer will be able to help you.
 
It should be fully feasible for a Catholic priest to perform “surreptitious marriages”… fully sacramental – priest and two witnesses … and no paperwork… no records…

It would be no different than someone being baptized without paperwork.

These have all the “disadvantages” of no paperwork arrangements. No civil advantages with respect to tax returns, inheritance, etc. But no sin issues, apart from having to deal with the potential for scandal. But then if a “married couple” were to move into a new house/ apartment/ community, no one would know what their history was. They would need to concoct a plausible story, last names, etc, so they could receive the sacraments and not give scandal, etc.
 
Talk to your bishop. You can also try the Canon Law forum at EWTN; they are very knowledgable, and can probably refer you to somebody in your area to help personally.
 
Here’s the canon law regarding marriage Authority That Regulates MarriageCan. 1016. The marriage of baptized persons is regulated not only by divine but also by canonical law, the civil power remaining competent in regard to the purely civil effects of marriage.

1. Marriage of Baptized Persons. It is governed by the divine law, the canonical law, and, in regard to certain effects, the civil law.

(a) The Divine Law. All that is required by the law of nature for a contract and a marriage contract is necessary also for Christian marriage. To this must be added the prescriptions of the divine positive law, from which the Church does not and cannot dispense.

(b) The Ecclesiastical Law. The Church claims full, independent and exclusive power over the marriage of all baptized persons – Catholics, heretics, schismatics – because she has received from Christ supreme authority in religious matters, and marriage is a sacrament, and because by Baptism men become her subjects, whether willing or not. The power is exclusive: “To decree and ordain about the sacrament is, by the will of Christ, so much a part of the power and duty of the Church that it is plainly absurd to maintain that even the smallest particle of such power has been transferred to the civil ruler” (Leo XIII, Encyc. Arcanum). It includes the legislative, judicial, and coercive power; that is, the power of establishing impediments both diriment and impedient, of deciding all matrimonial causes, of constraining married persons to comply with obligations, etc. It has, however, to be exercised within the limits of the natural and divine positive law, does not extend to merely civil effects, and should not unnecessarily interfere with the liberty of marriage. To marry is a right which every man has received from nature. It has to be respected; still, it is not absolutely independent in its exercise — the common and private good may demand that it be restricted at times and perhaps taken away altogether in some extraordinary cases. Thus, the Church might forbid a person infected with a serious contagious disease ever to marry, even under pain of nullity. In reality, such a person has no right to marry. (c) Civil Power. The civil power has no authority over the bond itself or what is essential to it, and can establish no real impediment, diriment or impediment, to the marriage of Christians. It has authority over the civil effects. The merely civil effects are those which concern the temporal order, and are separable from the marriage contract, as what pertains to the dowry, the right of succession, etc. (Vidal, n. 74). **The State has legislative, judicial, and coercive power over these; it may require certain formalities, like registration, as a condition for granting legal value to a canonically valid marriage, and punish the omission of those requirements. But even the purely civil effects should not be withheld without legitimate cause from a valid contract. And those which, although of a civil or temporal order in themselves, are inseparable from a valid contract – e.g., the legitimacy of children or cohabitation — should not be denied by the civil courts to marriage contracted in accordance with the laws of the Church (Cappello, n. 73; Can 1961). **
 
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mern1623:
My fiance and I are both eligible to be married in the Catholic church, but I am not able to be married legally because I would lose my health insurance. I am a widow, and receive a pension and health insurance from my late husband’s company. Since I have a pre-existing condition, it would be extremely expensive to have to switch to another insurance, and I have no pension plan of my own. My fiance is not able to support me financially, and he will be retiring soon and can go on Medicare, so insurance through his company is not an option. Is there any way we can be married in the Catholic church, but without it being legal? The company that provides my health insurance doesn’t refuse coverage to couples living together, but won’t continue coverage if the person remarries. I love my fiance very much, but feel that it is wrong to live together without being married.
Mern,

I’m a licensed canon lawyer and will give you this counsel.

This is a delicate and complicated matter which would be best discussed privately rather than on a public forum. There are issues of law that have to be evaluated at a number of levels. Since this is not merely a hypothetical situation, I am unwilling to address it here.

Take the matter to your parish priest and have him consult the bishop of your diocese. Your priest can consult canonists in the diocese, and of course, your bishop can do that as he wishes as well.

Good luck and God bless you.
 
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stbruno:
Not in the City of Chicago. In order to marry you need a marriage license issued by the County. I would look into alternative health insurance. If you decide to live together without the benefit of marriage, you would lose the ability to receive the Holy Eucharist. To me that is a graver error. To risk losing receiving Jesus vs. health insurance. No contest in my eyes.
Sorry. I know this is off thread but you said you need a licence to get married. Why do you need a licence?
In the UK, for example, a public announcement of your upcoming marriage is read out three successive Sundays at the Church you will be married in and a notice is posted outside a registry office for three consecutive weeks saying who is getting married.
 
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mern1623:
My fiance and I are both eligible to be married in the Catholic church, but I am not able to be married legally because I would lose my health insurance. I am a widow, and receive a pension and health insurance from my late husband’s company. Since I have a pre-existing condition, it would be extremely expensive to have to switch to another insurance, and I have no pension plan of my own. My fiance is not able to support me financially, and he will be retiring soon and can go on Medicare, so insurance through his company is not an option. Is there any way we can be married in the Catholic church, but without it being legal? The company that provides my health insurance doesn’t refuse coverage to couples living together, but won’t continue coverage if the person remarries. I love my fiance very much, but feel that it is wrong to live together without being married.
Talk to your pastor about your situation, It’s not impossible. Personally I’m beginning to see that it may not be morally wrong in light of the fact that they offer coverage to non-married but living-to-gether couples.
 
In order to be married legally in Chicago, the civil authorities require a license. The question in the thread is whether a religious only marriage can be performed. Many Protestant ministers will do this, for this very reason (where it would be a financial hardship to marry). The Episcopal church is creating a rite of marriage for this too as it becomes more common as people live longer.

I’d echo the thread, see a canon lawyer or a priest who can recommend one.
 
Al Masetti:
no sin issues, apart from having to deal with the potential for scandal.
Committing insurance fraud by claiming not to be married when you in fact are is a sin as well - may well be a grave sin too.
 
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LilyM:
Committing insurance fraud by claiming not to be married when you in fact are is a sin as well - may well be a grave sin too.
I would disagree because the question are you married in a legal document is regarding legal marriage only.
 
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a_cermak:
I would disagree because the question are you married in a legal document is regarding legal marriage only.
Fair enough - some forms might define marriage to include a common law relationship (what we call de facto here in Australia - where a couple have been living together in an exclusive relationship for a certain amount of time, without being formally married).

Check the forms carefully before you sign!
 
I think that for the sake of prudence the councel of Deacon Lansing should be taken and we should not discuss this specific topic any further because of the legal issues involved.
 
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mosher:
I think that for the sake of prudence the councel of Deacon Lansing should be taken and we should not discuss this specific topic any further because of the legal issues involved.
I agree with you. But I would add, for the benefit of some of our non-American forum members, that in the United States, a priest or deacon is authorized by both the Church AND THE STATE to officiate at marriages. This is not the case in all nations.
 
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SMHW:
I agree with you. But I would add, for the benefit of some of our non-American forum members, that in the United States, a priest or deacon is authorized by both the Church AND THE STATE to officiate at marriages. This is not the case in all nations.
As it was done under the old CIC, I’ll offer this anecdotal evidence. In Austria (and Germany, for that matter) civil and ecclesiastical marriage occur in two separate ceremonies. A couple first goes to the courthouse to get married legally, and then (and typically only then) they get married in the Church. My Austrian host parents, however, could not afford a civil marriage when they were younger and obtained permission (I’m not sure whether this was from Church, state, or both, but inferred both) to marry in the Church without the civil marriage provided that they would get legally married asap.

I doubt the legal hurdle of possible insurance fraud exists in this case, as they would both have been covered anyway under national health care.
 
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