Can You Avoid Giving Your Virginity to the Wrong Person?

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Ahappyman

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Virgin singles sooner or later will have to face the big decision of “losing” or “sharing” their virginity with the appropriate or maybe the inappropriate person unless they have the intent of remaining virgins the rest of their lives. Please allow me to differentiate the terms “losing” and “sharing”. My understanding of “losing” is when the act is purely physical and is not connected to love or a long term commitment. In the end, the act culminates in not being pleasing to the person losing his/her virginity. The experience has negative, worthless, and regretful effects. The person, who “shares” his /her virginity on the other hand, may or may not find the experience pleasing right away, but knows that it is a positive worthwhile experience. The focus from the beginning is on the totality of the persons involved rather than on the act alone. If the intimate pleasing does not happen at the time of the first act, then there will be plenty of love, commitment and time ahead to perfect the intimacy aspect. Needles to say, the person who “shares” his/her virginity would gladly go through the experience again with the same person he/she loves if time repeated again.

For those of you who are virgin singles out there who are about to face the moment of either “losing” or “sharing” your virginities, my guess is that you want rather to “share” it than “lose” it (hopefully that will be the case). The dilemma here is, how are you going to “share” it? This is not an easy task. One thing for sure is you can improve your chances of getting the best out of the actual experience before you live it by informing yourself. There are people who can help you in your dilemma such as those who participate in these blogs, for instance. There are websites that are becoming available who are addressing the issue of “sharing” vs. “losing” it. Google under virgin2virgin for instance and you can find information that is oriented for virgin people. You have to be cautious about some websites, nonetheless. There are also people you can trust who can assist you by telling you the real and true description of the “special” person you are about to “lose” or “share” your virginity, from the fake “special” one. Most importantly involve our Lord in your prayers so that you may encounter the perfect moment and person if you intend to share your virginity.

Any other thoughts on this issue?
 
Your post makes absolutely no sense. And by the way, did it escape your attention that this is a Catholic forum? You wait until you are married to have sex.
 
Let me add that if your “intended” cannot wait until marriage, he/she is definitely leading you down the wrong road and is the wrong person.

Silly question in a Catholic Forum
 
Ahappyman said:
Virgin singles sooner or later will have to face the big decision of “losing” or “sharing” their virginity with the appropriate or maybe the inappropriate person unless they have the intent of remaining virgins the rest of their lives. Please allow me to differentiate the terms “losing” and “sharing”. My understanding of “losing” is when the act is purely physical and is not connected to love or a long term commitment. In the end, the act culminates in not being pleasing to the person losing his/her virginity. The experience has negative, worthless, and regretful effects. The person, who “shares” his /her virginity on the other hand, may or may not find the experience pleasing right away, but knows that it is a positive worthwhile experience. The focus from the beginning is on the totality of the persons involved rather than on the act alone. If the intimate pleasing does not happen at the time of the first act, then there will be plenty of love, commitment and time ahead to perfect the intimacy aspect. Needles to say, the person who “shares” his/her virginity would gladly go through the experience again with the same person he/she loves if time repeated again.

For those of you who are virgin singles out there who are about to face the moment of either “losing” or “sharing” your virginities, my guess is that you want rather to “share” it than “lose” it (hopefully that will be the case). The dilemma here is, how are you going to “share” it? This is not an easy task. One thing for sure is you can improve your chances of getting the best out of the actual experience before you live it by informing yourself. There are people who can help you in your dilemma such as those who participate in these blogs, for instance. There are websites that are becoming available who are addressing the issue of “sharing” vs. “losing” it. Google under virgin2virgin for instance and you can find information that is oriented for virgin people. You have to be cautious about some websites, nonetheless. There are also people you can trust who can assist you by telling you the real and true description of the “special” person you are about to “lose” or “share” your virginity, from the fake “special” one. Most importantly involve our Lord in your prayers so that you may encounter the perfect moment and person if you intend to share your virginity.

Any other thoughts on this issue?
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You say you are Catholic, then…you should KNOW that we wait until marriage to have sex. Anything else, is settling, anyways. Why tell someone that he/she needs to share his/her virginity unless he/she is married? No, he/she should wait until marriage…anything short of marriage WILL be regretful. Even if the two loved one another, or had a ‘great time,’ premartial sex is often regretable…just read some of the threads on here of people who did that, even though they married the person they had premarital sex with, the tone of their posts is regret.

Please don’t give people this misleading advice, especially seeing that you are Catholic.
 
Sometimes even when you marry you find out too late you gave your virginity to the wrong person. Just sayin’… 🤷
 
😦 Yes, that’s true too Liberano.

I think the OP is insinuating that if someone ‘wants to share’ his/her virginity with someone before marriage, it’s perfectly fine, because…it would be sharing, and not losing. That is such misleading ‘advice.’ 😦
 
I don’t understand your premise for making the distinction between loosing and sharing???

When you have sex for the first time you’re no longer a virgin. This '‘loosing’ and ‘sharing’ is word play I think.

How do you avoid loosing your virginity to the wrong person? Don’t have sex until you’re married and choose a spouse wisely.
 
I am the person who posted the thread. First of all, I apologize for not having posted the last sentence following “Most importantly involve our Lord in your prayers so that you may encounter the perfect moment and person if you intend to share your virginity.” in the second paragraph. I meant to end the post with the sentence:

“Hopefully, the “perfect moment” will be at the time of marriage or else you will end up very regretful.”

I hope this will clarify my belief on the issue. I agree with your responses to my thread that virginity should be “shared” at the time of marriage and not before.
 
Ahappyman said:
I am the person who posted the thread. First of all, I apologize for not having posted the last sentence following “Most importantly involve our Lord in your prayers so that you may encounter the perfect moment and person if you intend to share your virginity.” in the second paragraph. I meant to end the post with the sentence:

“Hopefully, the “perfect moment” will be at the time of marriage or else you will end up very regretful.”

I hope this will clarify my belief on the issue. I agree with your responses to my thread that virginity should be “shared” at the time of marriage and not before.
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You certainly did spend a lot of time sounding like you were condoning premarital sex. Especially since you can only “share” or “loose” your virginity once. So in this conversation share = loose and this should be saved for the marital act and not on some belief that you will be together forever anyway.

The mere belief that kids will be kids and there all doing it anyway, so lets give in mantra really sickens me. Just as Palin’s daughter states that to expect abstinence in children in this day and age is unrealistic. We have brought ourselves down to our base senses and think that this is fine. Why is it we do not expect more from our children then we do from our dogs? I could go on and on about not telling our children our expectations, then expose them to sexual acts on TV and in Movies (and on the street) then getting upset because they turn up with STDs and pregnant.

And Yeah, marriage does not always promise the desired outcome.
 
I just came back from work and I was giving more careful thought to my thread. I do appreciate for your responses. Now, that I am rereading it, you are right, I was sounding like I was approving premarital sex of a virgin person from the beginning of my post. I needed to shed light of my understanding of the terms “losing” and “sharing” of virginity some more. So, here I am. By “sharing” the virginity I should have stated that the act happens at the time of marriage, while “losing” it happens prior to marriage. In both cases, virginity is given, but the “sharing” of it is not giving it in vain since “sharing” it involves love, a life term commitment and the Lord.

With regards to one of the responses to my thread (“Um…kind of a “duh” answer, you wait until your married.”) conceptually the response makes my question seem like a rhetorical question. But the sad reality is that large numbers of our virgin singles are “losing” their virginity instead of “sharing” it. Many of our kids who are “losing” it conceptually know that they are supposed to save themselves for marriage, but the reality is proving otherwise. Another thread response mentioned some of the reasons as to why this is happening. Our kids are exposed to sexual acts on TV, movies and there is a lack of parent involvement in this area. I will add another element that is having a major impact in the lives of our kids, namely the internet.

What can we do to help the many kids who are facing the dilemma right know of “loosing” their virginity, instead of them waiting to “share” it at the time of their marriage. Talking to the parents who are not getting involved would be a good way to start dealing with the problem. But, how are we going to carry that out? Talking to the kids themselves about the real value of virginity, would be another way. But again, most parents don’t talk about this topic with their kids.

How do we reconcile the concept of “waiting until getting married” on one side of the spectrum and the sad reality of our youth in large numbers “losing” their precious virginities given by God to them on the opposite side. The most comfortable position is to remain complacent to the problem.
 
You must be a parent. Maybe you are a virgin yourself? Courting a virgin? Man? Woman? Why has this issue burdened you all of the sudden? Since you are new, you may want to visit the anthologies of this subject in this forums history. I feel like I am repeating myself over and over again.

I guess I will be a guinea pig since I am what you asked for and it looks like no other single virgins are responding. I have had these talks with parents who beg me to tell their kids, mostly girls, to teach them my way of life. This is a bit difficult because so much is based on self-determination (and I am naturally quite stubborn), and leading with your head moreover than your heart, especially during a courtship.

If I may go back in time, as I am in my early thirties, and remember well the temptation and pressure of being young, however not choosing to join the crowd. Having experience on the fronts of urban private all girls catholic, urban public, and rural public high schools, the fears and mistrusts were more than one could take, I am sure you can imagine. The careless behaviors of most of the girls who “lost it, “ (that being defined as you say in an unmarried, meaningless, and careless manner with no focus on God or repercussion), was happening for a few reasons, the obvious to state at the time, I mean from what I could visually attain from the behaviors of vulnerable girls at that age was either they thought they were in love and ready or they felt pressure because all of their friends were losing it and did not want to be left behind for fear of not having the experience and losing their click. Later these girls used excuses of having mean/pressuring parents or teachers as outlets for finding love and acceptance elsewhere, where I saw them as just clear cut excuses for being rebellious or promiscuous, because they in fact “wanted to,” there was never a report of rape in all of high school, all the gossip that headed around had consensual connotations to it.

Sharing has a different connotation, I immediately think of marriage, however that would be more detailed, as sharing your bodies, because I know of teenagers where the boy and girl are both innocent and sharing their virginities, but not in marriage, and in the Catholic sense, my Pastor describes marriage as the full giving of one another’s body, of course with the assumption of virginity, but like you said, that is not the case in today’s bastardized world.

For the boys, it is interesting how it was, at those times strictly for experience and pleasure, with absolutely no strings attached. I go mad every time I hear the mantra, “Why buy the cow, when the milk is free?” And how girls still think they have to do disgusting things when many men are testing their self control or just using them as tonight’s catch, and they just keep doing it to see how long he will stick around. I just can’t understand it. I can understand the demands in standard American dating (however a man like this is easy to figure out on the first date and completely look over), but if I date a practicing Catholic, at least I have a chance at common ground until I date these men actively, and the heartache to see that they are just like every other guy, I even went as far as going on strictly Catholics dating sites to read profiles clearer. WHY? I care about their personal beliefs and intentions with me. Since everyone and their mother are marrying off sites like this nowadays, I went to my faith directly and the sadness in some of those forums there relate much to the sadness I read in some of these forums. Namely, Catholic hypocrisies, saying they are this or about that, and doing the other. One of these sites and a specific thread saying that all the dates they went on that specifically said on their profiles said they were not for premarital sex, were all false, all the girls he was dating were getting to frisky on even first dates. No one knows how true that is, they are opinions on a forum, someone’s suggested experience.

Yes, even at this stage in my life, I would want it in marriage only, even if you lost or shared yourself at the virgin age of 60 or like the news had a 98 (or 103?, cant remember which) year old woman who is a still a waiting virgin, you want it the right way, but for a woman it is highly emotional, and I am leaning to a vocation as a hermit at this point, because your concern is of a great one to me, namely getting through to youth, who seem nowadays, not so much so in my youth, but what I gather from stories of younger generations that happen to coincide with something I saw on Oprah several years back. This was disturbing, but youth and teen, going about and flaunting their virginity, especially young girls, and saving themselves for marriage, when they were doing disgusting things elsewhere, but justifying their behavior by saying they never did penetration, are these girls kidding themselves? And the boys who egg it on for their own benefit and just as irresponsible in their actions, who do they think they are kidding? How in the world do they think they all have it figured out?

I do not find being a virgin to be a dilemma; it is a huge trust issue for me, as I cannot seem to read the intentions of men well at all. Especially when I catch them in lies or hypocrisies. I just wish they understood themselves well at that point in life where they were courting for marriage and stop playing baby games, I mean, just spill it, what are you about, tell it like it is, and hold true to that. The last thing I want is to run into people of your past and find out things that are surprising to me especially if we had been married for fifteen years at that point.
 
It is true what someone said here, if I choose the vocation of marriage, not everything is assumed to be hunky dory just because I did it the correct and right way by my standards and by my faiths standards. I am a virgin, he may not be, he could have a disease and not disclose that to me (or not know himself), an illegitimate child could pop up, I can have ill children, I cannot have children at all, he cannot bear me a child, he had a sordid past, I get AIDS, STD, HPVetc etc. I have to be extremely forgiving in much of this if those things happen afterward. Realizing it ahead of time makes it easier, but you are no better off than a non-virgin.

No doubt in my mind that the Internet makes the pressures and views on children’s psyche negatively influence, NO DOUBT! In my time of the early 90’s in high school it was regular rated R movies or smut that was passed along from bad influences that marked an amazing fear in me…was I going to have to do all that to be loved or keep a man? I was not a dumb kid, I knew that wasn’t love however the boys were infatuated with this, and had I had better male examples around that would at least disagree or defy it, it would have not been a question I was struggling with in my youth, but unfortunately it was like all they wanted to do was impress the coach/or their friends by following the crowd, not challenging or asking too many questions.

Maybe at these tender ages if I understood that the act was marital and nice and not at all what it seems to be in movies (bad ones), I would have been a bit more hopeful, focused, and intent on finding someone for marriage, but these fears I feel back then are still fresh in me as a teenager and I fear that gaining trust or good intentions from any man at this point, are in fact, impossible. Anytime I meet someone new, it is a bigger trial learning all over again, since any man from my past still have those negative connotations, and I remember them being like the crowd and nothing sweetly diverse in character. Since I see a lot of schoolmates around the parish, and with this Facebook in our grasp, I am forced to face a past of disdain and irritations, what is amazing are these men who took such innocence because it was a requirement of that time in their youth are coming forth now initiating conversations but flat out saying they are sorry for pressuring or being a jerk. I say that because it just happened yesterday to someone I know, and I recall Bonnie Hunt saying the same thing on her talk show a few months ago.

Because trust is a problem for me, and so also, as you can understand, is forgiveness. In some way I feel righted that I did everything according to the book, I was tired of sinners so much so that I MUST forgive them, and it angers me I guess much like the prodigal son story, because if it is so easy to forgive ones sins and past and I am this sucker being good all the time, then why shouldn’t I have just joined the crowd? I am a child of God, and I love innocence, and I love God and thought that there is this greater being out there better than myself and this being looks over me even in my spiritual low days, as much as I would like to be optimistic, I am human, and cannot always readily wear a smile on my face, but I try, and I trudge along.

OP, I can’t really understand why you are calling on virgins for this question. Your mystery to your own identity which is becoming somehow a vast popularity in these forums of new members with very little disclosure to who they are, is very peculiar, because your question was not phrased correctly or understood well initially, and even though you recanted and went into better detail, I think you should be asking this question to non virgins. Here’s why! Emotional recall! You never forget your first time, right (Please no drunken comments, I’m too old to hear that excuse anymore, and far too fed up with the tolerance of it)? Why? Why did you do it (if you did), and why does anyone else? Your memory will give you the answers and so will the memory of others here. It is the parts that make up the whole. You are correct in saying there is an overwhelming guilt after the fact and resentment kicks in for many people. I don’t know why that is. If guilt is naturally felt mainly out of a marriage, then I think it is simple enough to say that is the only evidence you need to understand that it is not in your favor or God’s to continue something like that.

I will answer this though, I had always an infatuation with boys since grade school, but if it was not met the same way, I could do little or nothing about it. In high school, I thought very strongly if the boys I liked, liked me back, I may have a big problem succumbing to temptation. Then became very proud of myself as in college someone I liked very much like me back in the same way, and time really told me so much, because he was, in fact, a jerk, and it took me a while, but I never got to involved or excited about who would have been a slam dunk disappointment in my life. No matter anyone’s put downs, I was never desperate, I valued myself, my faith, my education, and my mother. Never could I want to disappoint all of that. Why work backwards?
 
If you have more reading time I have similar responses under my profile if you want to search in your free time. There is so much to read on here already concerning this. In short, it is becoming more difficult to convince youth to postpone dating or intimacy until they are clearly and directly focused on courting and marriage, especially with the more education attainment in our goals, most of us are able to manage all of this stuff well. It is not as easy for these hormone driven youth, so I feel for these parents now a days. Some of these sounds like a parental concern, but the answers lie deep in you sometimes. Personally, my milk is never free, you must buy this cow, and she is darn expensive!! I hope this helps! Sorry for yet again another long-winded response, I seem to think too much and give you all an earful!
 
Ahappyman said:
Virgin singles sooner or later will have to face the big decision of “losing” or “sharing” their virginity with the appropriate or maybe the inappropriate person unless they have the intent of remaining virgins the rest of their lives. Please allow me to differentiate the terms “losing” and “sharing”. My understanding of “losing” is when the act is purely physical and is not connected to love or a long term commitment. In the end, the act culminates in not being pleasing to the person losing his/her virginity. The experience has negative, worthless, and regretful effects. The person, who “shares” his /her virginity on the other hand, may or may not find the experience pleasing right away, but knows that it is a positive worthwhile experience. The focus from the beginning is on the totality of the persons involved rather than on the act alone. If the intimate pleasing does not happen at the time of the first act, then there will be plenty of love, commitment and time ahead to perfect the intimacy aspect. Needles to say, the person who “shares” his/her virginity would gladly go through the experience again with the same person he/she loves if time repeated again.

For those of you who are virgin singles out there who are about to face the moment of either “losing” or “sharing” your virginities, my guess is that you want rather to “share” it than “lose” it (hopefully that will be the case). The dilemma here is, how are you going to “share” it? This is not an easy task. One thing for sure is you can improve your chances of getting the best out of the actual experience before you live it by informing yourself. There are people who can help you in your dilemma such as those who participate in these blogs, for instance. There are websites that are becoming available who are addressing the issue of “sharing” vs. “losing” it. Google under virgin2virgin for instance and you can find information that is oriented for virgin people. You have to be cautious about some websites, nonetheless. There are also people you can trust who can assist you by telling you the real and true description of the “special” person you are about to “lose” or “share” your virginity, from the fake “special” one. Most importantly involve our Lord in your prayers so that you may encounter the perfect moment and person if you intend to share your virginity.

Any other thoughts on this issue?
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Sex is sex, no matter HOW you spin it.

Wait til marriage. Durrrrrrr.
 
OLHope said:
You must be a parent. Maybe you are a virgin yourself? Courting a virgin? Man? Woman? Why has this issue burdened you all of the sudden?
I am a parent and happily married. I have two children (a boy and a girl) who are teenagers. I was thirty-four when I got married. Both my wife and I were virgins when we got married. And Yes I was asked many a time the physical oriented question: Are you a virgin? by several of my female acquaintances, prior to my marriage. You can find more about me and my wife on the internet. Just google under virgin2virgin and you will be able to find our site which is a meeting place for virgins.

I can write a long story on the aspect of virginity, yet time is a winning adversary today. The bottom line is that we can identify the issues that our virgins are facing now days and about how many of our kids are succumbing to the snares of the winning adversaries called temptations (TV, movies, acquaintances, lack of parent involvement, the internet, etc) and “losing” their virginities in vain as a result of them. This trend is affecting the lives of those kids. The sad part, nonetheless, is that when they lose their virginity, those kids also lose part of their lives because virginity is part of them. My wife and I were reflecting on the issue and came up with the conclusion that despite we are confronting an apparent hopeless situation, there is a lot we can concretely do to redirect our virgin youth on the right track. We may not be able to reach out to all of them, but we are resolved in reaching out to as many as we can even if the outcome is an insignificant number. A hopeless situation for us would be not reaching out to anyone. So our intent is not to make it easy on “the winning adversaries called temptations” to always win and to give hope to the virgin youth. Sure it is hard for our virgin kids not to succumb to the status quo. But we are letting them know that there are choices as to how they are going to use their precious virginity. How do we intend to do that? Here are some things we are already putting into practice.

1 We can use the same channels that are tempting the kids to succumb. The channels will have to be friendly to them in order to achieve positive outcomes. Using one of the channels (the internet), my wife and I took on the task of creating our website exclusively for virgins (regardless of age). It is not a perfect site, but we can already anticipate positive results through the virgin members’ interaction. We have encountered a couple hurdles (our site is dwindled in popularity compared with other “tempting” sites and it costs money to sustain it) but are resolved not to give up.
2 We are participating in forums and blogs to invite people (virgin and non virgin people) to share their opinions in the area of virginity and especially to appeal to all virgin people that they have choices as to how they are going to use their virginity and that is fine for them to talk to a caring and mature someone about it. Our forum and blog involvement so far has been positive.
3 We are dialoguing with our own kids at home to discuss the value of their virginity. We are aware that if we create a prohibiting environment to them as to how they are going to use their virginity, and the more we are going to increase the chances of achieving undesirable results. Instead, we are resorting to have an open communication with them on the issue. We are adding one more ingredient: we pray for them. After all, our kids are going to be exposed to the “temptations” like any other kids when we are not around them. But, they will be also “armed” with a stronger self-determination as to how they are going to use the goodness of their virginity properly. They will also hopefully put this notion on top of the temptations they confront. They know virginity is a gift of God and that they have the power to “share” it or not. There is nothing wrong if they decide to stay virgin the rest of their lives and serve the Lord and His people. If they choose to “share” it, they also know that they will have the opportunity to “share” it with the right person. Things may not work as expected, but we are giving our kids higher probabilities to build more inner power to say no to temptations.

We do not know how much impact we are going to have with our involvement, but we feel that is better to at least try to start creating some kind of consensus in the area of virginity for the sake of our virgin people. Staying a virgin for the sake of the Lord and “sharing” someone’s virginity at the time of marriage are awesome options for them. With our help (whether they are virgin or not) they can succeed.
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Can you avoid giving your virginity to the wrong person? The answer isn’t as easy as everyone makes it out ot be.

I read a lot of “wait until marriage”. Ideally a person marries for the right reasons and the act of sex is a mutually rewarding/satisfactory experience. But occasionally two people get married for all the wrong reasons and therefore sex was with the “wrong person”.

Therefore there is no correct answer that will suffice for everyone. The person losing/sharing their virginity can ascertain the answer only after the act was completed.

As for the theory: “Wait until Marriage”. I’m a realist. Not every Catholic subscribes to that teaching of the Church. Have you been to mass lately? Have you seen any pregnant teens that you know aren’t married? Have you seen the couple that has been living commited/faithfull together for years and years?

It happens. Does it make them wrong in the eyes of the Church? You betcha.
Does it mean that they are condemned to hell? I want to believe that the God I love and know wouldn’t penalize them for being in love.
 
Ahappyman said:
We are dialoguing with our own kids at home to discuss the value of their virginity. We are aware that if we create a prohibiting environment to them as to how they are going to use their virginity, and the more we are going to increase the chances of achieving undesirable results. Instead, we are resorting to have an open communication with them on the issue. We are adding one more ingredient: we pray for them. After all, our kids are going to be exposed to the “temptations” like any other kids when we are not around them. But, they will be also “armed” with a stronger self-determination as to how they are going to use the goodness of their virginity properly. They will also hopefully put this notion on top of the temptations they confront.

We do not know how much impact we are going to have with our involvement, but we feel that is better to at least try to start creating some kind of consensus in the area of virginity for the sake of our virgin people.
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I agree with what you have written above. I think most kids don’t respond well to a very strict/prohibiting environment. Or if they do, once they go off to college they ‘let loose’ and do all the things their parents wouldn’t let them do. I sadly saw this occur with many devout Catholics that attended my high school growing up and went off to college and basically did a lot of immoral things because it was the first time they were away from their parents and never had that sort of freedom.

I feel their are many forms of temptations out there and the media, in all its outlets, portrays a very ‘over sexed’ culture, making it seem proper to have relations with anyone, at any time. However, I these mediums are a distant second to the affects parenting can have on the child.

For example, a young girl needs a loving father figure in her life. She needs to see her father treat her mother with respect, care, and love. She also needs to be loved and appreciated by her father. If the father is absent or withdrawn or for whatever reason, not loving towards the daughter, once she becomes a certain age, she will seek out the affection of boys at school to fill the emotional gap left by her father - and she will be vulnerable to having sex at an early age to express or feel love.

I also feel the same goes for boys, but they need to be close to their mothers. However, it is their father that they will ultimately learn how to treat women from. It is good and proactive parenting that will ultimately help guide children along the correct path in life.

Speaking from personal experience - I am in my late twenties and still a virgin waiting until marriage. I only had one ‘talk’ about sex and such with my parents when I was pretty young. It was awkward, but they emphasized it was for grownups that were married, but that key point stuck with me. I made their job as parents rather easy by being a generally good and trustworthy kid. In turn they never set any restrictions on me and gave me independence/freedom. I managed to make the right choices and not get in trouble and avoid situations that could bring about immoral behavior (regardless of how difficult the choice was to make).

I was generally very close with both my mother and father (and still am)…which I think played a big part in me making ‘good’ decisions in my childhood. It also helped me be a good role model for my younger brother (which once again made things easier for them). If the oldest child can set a good example,then the younger ones will almost always follow suit. Unfortunately, this is often true if the older one gets in trouble a lot.

My point is, kids will be tempted by society numerous times, but with supportive and loving parents, they will almost always make good choices. Parenting plays the biggest role, in my opinion.
 
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