Can you get rid of your Godparents?

[paul11b]

I have sister in law that is 30 years old and her Godfather is 50. To make a long story short my sister in law and her Godfather have some really bad irreconcilable differences and she recently asked my if the Church would let her get rid of her Godfather. I wanted to find out if this was possible and if so how she would go about doing it.

 

[adrift]

No you cannot change your Godparents.

 

[Love_Divine]

It’s true. You’re stuck with them. This happened with my God parents and their first-born. They chose a long-time business associate as the god father. He and my uncle had a falling out business wise, but they’re still stuck with him as their son’s god father. This is why choosing god parents should be thoroughly thought out.

 

[st_felicity]

Perhaps there is a reason for him to be her Godfather. Perhaps they are to teach each other forgiveness or something else?

 

[PJM]

=paul11b;7849152]I have sister in law that is 30 years old and her Godfather is 50. To make a long story short my sister in law and her Godfather have some really bad irreconcilable differences and she recently asked my if the Church would let her get rid of her Godfather. I wanted to find out if this was possible and if so how she would go about doing it.

NO! The relationship is a Covenant based one and cannot be changed. That is why the selection of God-Parents is so critically important.

PRAY!

 

[puzzleannie]

you cannot change the historical fact that this person stood up as your godparent so many years ago, and so no that baptismal record will not change. If that person is no longer suitable as a godparent you do not have to maintain a relationship with him and you are free to cultivate other friends and mentors who are better examples of the Christian life. But that does not require or involve any action on the part of the Church. An adult, unless they are being newly baptized, or being confirmed and seeking a sponsor is a bit past the need for godparents in any case.

 

[Catholic90]

She is 30. What does she need to gave a godfather for at this stage ?

 

[Claire_from_DE]

My first reaction on reading the question was that no method of murder is allowed by the church regardless of the differences. Live and let live, she doesn’t need a godfather at this point in her life.

 

[PJM]

=Catholic90;7849467]She is 30. What does she need to gave a godfather for at this stage ?

Every one can make GOOD USe of a SOLID CATHOLIC MENTOR. Age is not a factor of need.

Satan is REAL and Really Dangerous!

Find a Good Solid catholic that you can talk to and confide in.

God Bless,
Pat

 

[Catholic90]

Every one can make GOOD USe of a SOLID CATHOLIC MENTOR. Age is not a factor of need.

Satan is REAL and Really Dangerous!

Find a Good Solid catholic that you can talk to and confide in.

God Bless,
Pat

But this person does NOT need to be a Godfather!

 

[SwizzleStick]

I have sister in law that is 30 years old and her Godfather is 50. To make a long story short my sister in law and her Godfather have some really bad irreconcilable differences and she recently asked my if the Church would let her get rid of her Godfather. I wanted to find out if this was possible and if so how she would go about doing it.

“Can you get rid of your Godparents?” I’m sorry, but my immediate reaction to that question as phrased was that one cannot get rid of one’s Godparents no matter what, even if one has mob connections or if one can make the claim “I’m going to make him an offer he can’t refuse” (from “The Godfather.”) That line just popped into my head after reading the thread title.



As far as a serious answer, a 30-year old does not need a Godparent anymore. One may need a good Catholic mentor and also a confessor, but a Godparent is not really needed at that stage of life. I think that is why folks going through RCIA need sponsors rather than Godparents.

 

[st_felicity]

I think that is why folks going through RCIA need sponsors rather than Godparents.

If the person is unbaptized, that person’s “sponsor” is his/her Godparent.

 

[SwizzleStick]

If the person is unbaptized, that person’s “sponsor” is his/her Godparent.

You are correct. After I posted, I did some further reading because I am not really familiar with anyone who became Catholic as an adult (most of my family members and friends are cradle Catholics), so I wanted to read about RCIA sponsors. Here is the quote I found that supports that a “Godparent” is a “sponsor” as you said. Actually, I’m sure I knew that, but I have used the term “Godparent” for so long, I’d forgotten the term “sponsor” for an infant.

“…Traditionally, we identify the sponsor of a child for baptism as the godparent — godmother or godfather, but the technical term remains “sponsor.” …”

Blue excerpted from:

The Role of Godparents
catholiceducation.org/articles/religion/re0233.html

 

[SwizzleStick]

Here’s another pertinent quote from the link:

“…In all, godparents serve a special role in the life of the baptized person. Therefore, each parent should choose a godparent not just because of a blood relationship or friendship; rather, a godparent should be a trustworthy witness of the faith who will help the godchild attain salvation.”

The Role of Godparents
catholiceducation.org/articles/religion/re0233.html

 

[rick43235]

I have sister in law that is 30 years old and her Godfather is 50. To make a long story short my sister in law and her Godfather have some really bad irreconcilable differences and she recently asked my if the Church would let her get rid of her Godfather. I wanted to find out if this was possible and if so how she would go about doing it.

Make him a offer he can’t refuse.

 

[Phemie]

If the person is unbaptized, that person’s “sponsor” is his/her Godparent.

Not necessarily. You are often assigned a sponsor during RCIA but you choose your own godparent who need not be that sponsor.

 

[st_felicity]

Not necessarily. You are often assigned a sponsor during RCIA but you choose your own godparent who need not be that sponsor.

No–the sponsor is the technical godparent on the church paperwork–any other would be a “Christian Witness.”

 

[Phemie]

No–the sponsor is the technical godparent on the church paperwork–any other would be a “Christian Witness.”

The godparent on paper is the Catholic who stands with the person at baptism.

In RCIA, one may have a sponsor from the period of inquiry, through the catecumenate. That person need not be the godparent. The godparent, if it is a different person, accompanies the person on the day of election, at the sacraments of initiation and for the period of mystagogy. (article 10 & 11 of the Canadian Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults)

 

[st_felicity]

The godparent on paper is the Catholic who stands with the person at baptism.

In RCIA, one may have a sponsor from the period of inquiry, through the catecumenate. That person need not be the godparent. The godparent, if it is a different person, accompanies the person on the day of election, at the sacraments of initiation and for the period of mystagogy. (article 10 & 11 of the Canadian Rite of Christian Initiation of Adults)

Oh, I see what you’re describing. That is unusual–the person who accompanies the Catechumen in the RCIA process is generally preferred to be the person who stands with them at the reception of the Sacraments and rites. I understand, though, that that can’t always happen.

 

[mellowcalico]

Nope, you are stuck with whatever Godparents you have. In the case of a 30-year-old, it doesn’t matter so much any more.

My daughter (who is 6-years-old) has a poor choice of Godparents. I remember my husband and I arguing over it. His sister wanted to be Godmother more than anything (but she didn’t go to church at all). And he agreed with his sister.

Well, after some arguing and finding out that she wouldn’t be able to be a Godparent unless she got a letter from “her Church” I decided to let events play out (thinking no Church would write a letter that she was a practicing member–since she wasn’t). somehow she got a letter from a priest and became my daughter’s Godmother (and my brother-in-law became her Godfather).

It’s just sad, her Godmother doesn’t even speak to me, hates the Church, is a very active pro-abortion supporter and her godfather doesn’t even believe in God. Their own children aren’t Baptized. I still have no idea why they were so keen to be godparents when they don’t care about the faith. I remember her walking out on the Mass prior to the baptism because she didn’t agree with the homily the priest gave. My only guess as to why she was so eager to be Godmother was was to have the “cool title.”

In any case, since they are pretty much out of my life now, I plan on asking my cousin to do things like First Communion sponsor and such when that comes along instead of her Godparents (my cousin is single, but she is a practicing Catholic, goes to Mass every week, etc).