Cannot Connect to Christ or Mary

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DominicSA

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I was raised Seventh Day Adventist. At 20 I converted to the RCC. I then wandered into Deism and came back to the RCC two years ago.

I love God. I love the church. I know and believe in Christ, what he sacrificed for us etc. I acknowlege Mary as the Mother of God etc.

I participate in the church, pray the Rosary etc etc. All with the intention of being the best son of God that I can be. I am NOT doing this to gain “points” in heaven or here on earth.

PROBLEM: I cannot “FEEL” this intense personal relationship with Jesus or Mary that many people talk about. I really try but even when I talk to people about religion, they notice that I mainly speak about GOD and not Christ and especially the word JESUS.

I also say the Rosary but the Hail Mary does not seem to do anything for me except that it becomes boring after 53 times.

I do not intend to be a good RC or Christian if I am only going through the motions.

HELP
 
When you say “God”, are you referring to the Father, or the Holy Spirit and not Jesus or the Trinity?
There’s nothing wrong with having an affinity to any person of the Holy Trinity, or the Trinity as a whole.

As to the Most Holy Mother of God or Christ, one need not pray the Rosary - try praying/reading/meditating on something like these:

According to your mercy, pour out upon me, who am miserable, at least one small drop of grace to make me understand and be converted, that I might make at least some small effort to correct myself. For if your grace does not illumine my soul, I will not be able to see the carelessness and negligence that the passions have produced in me through my apathy and recklessness.
  • St. Ephraim the Syrian, “69: The Wiles of the Enemy and the Resources of Sin,” A Spiritual Psalter or Reflections on God
St. Ephraim, on the Mother of God:

“Sadducees of old gave Mary, the daughter of David, the Holy virgin, beautiful and glorious names. Ezekiel, the son of exile, called her a shut gate and Solomon called her a locked paradise and a sealed spring. David called her a city in which Jesus grew to be the grass without sowing and to be the meat for all the people. On his birthday Jesus freed us from curse”.

“The bush that Moses beheld on Mount Sinai, symbolizes you, oh, Holy Virgin. It represents your holy body, its leaves, which did not burn stand for your virginity Hallelujah, Hallelujah; and the fire in the bush is a symbol of God who dwelled in you”

“The chariot, the chosen Prophet Ezekiel beheld, is way behind your beauty, for the animals, tied to it, while the cherubs are blessing, and the images of the four figures, that is the lion, the ox, the eagle and man, are different from one another. Whereas your knees, oh blessed Mother, have become a chariot for him, and your arms a wheel and your mouth, in glorification, hymns”

“Moses’ bush, your father David’s Ark of the Covenant, Gideon’s fleece, the ladder of Jacob, the Sadducee, by means of which the human race ascended to heaven were all symbols of you Mary”.

A litany by Mor Jacob in the prayer said on Wednesday morning reads:

“May you be blessed oh, Mary; for the Ark of the Covenant, made by Moses as a pattern, is an implicit symbol of you, for it included the two tables written by God and you were the dwelling of the real bread of life”.

“The rock out of which the rivers in the wilderness sprang is a symbol of you oh, Holy Virgin Mary. From you the Son of God, who is the rock of righteousness, according to St. Paul, shone forth. It’s you, Oh Virgin, who are full of beauty that king David predicted saying: the daughter of the king stood (to the right of the king) in glory and holiness and the king was so enchanted by her beauty that he descended and dwelled in her womb”.
 
I would suggest that you start to read some of the incredible spiritual works that are available … there are many good ones … the latest one I read that was very inspiring is …

This Tremendous Lover: The Beloved Spiritual Classic on God’s Pursuit of the Soul

by Dom Eugene Boylan O.C.R.

amazon.com/gp/product/096759782X/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o06_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

I also would recommend your seeking the spiritual counselling of your parish priest … there are various retreats that people go to that help them spiritually … he may be able to recommend one in your area.
 
DominicSA said:
PROBLEM: I cannot “FEEL” this intense personal relationship with Jesus or Mary that many people talk about. I really try but even when I talk to people about religion, they notice that I mainly speak about GOD and not Christ and especially the word JESUS.

HELP
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Well, I can’t help you out with Mary (I have a respect for her, but not a passion), but certainly with Jesus. I can only say that you should remember how much He understands us, being both God and man (Hebrews 4:5) and that we are His friends (John 15:14-15). Jesus is even better than your closest acquaintance because you can pour out your soul to Him (and He’s God).

Bless your journey.
 
DominicSA said:
I was raised Seventh Day Adventist. At 20 I converted to the RCC. I then wandered into Deism and came back to the RCC two years ago.

I love God. I love the church. I know and believe in Christ, what he sacrificed for us etc. I acknowlege Mary as the Mother of God etc.

I participate in the church, pray the Rosary etc etc. All with the intention of being the best son of God that I can be. I am NOT doing this to gain “points” in heaven or here on earth.
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This is all good. You are a member of Christ’s body. You desire to love God in his Church. All good. 🙂
PROBLEM: I cannot “FEEL” this intense personal relationship with Jesus or Mary that many people talk about. I really try but even when I talk to people about religion, they notice that I mainly speak about GOD and not Christ and especially the word JESUS.
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You don’t need to nor are you expected to “feel” anything. Feelings come and go. We don’t live by feelings but by faith in Christ and his redemptive work for us.
I also say the Rosary but the Hail Mary does not seem to do anything for me except that it becomes boring after 53 times.
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Well, the rosary is a disciplinary devotion to which not everyone warms. Since it’s a private devotion, if it doesn’t help your spirituality you don’t have to pray it.
I do not intend to be a good RC or Christian if I am only going through the motions.
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HELP
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It’s not merely going through the motions to be faithful even if we feel nothing. St. Teresa of Calcutta felt nothing at all for many years, and yet she’s been declared a saint just recently. Don’t depend on feelings–depend on God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, and you will be just fine. 🙂
 
DominicSA said:
I was raised Seventh Day Adventist. At 20 I converted to the RCC. I then wandered into Deism and came back to the RCC two years ago.

I love God. I love the church. I know and believe in Christ, what he sacrificed for us etc. I acknowlege Mary as the Mother of God etc.

I participate in the church, pray the Rosary etc etc. All with the intention of being the best son of God that I can be. I am NOT doing this to gain “points” in heaven or here on earth.

PROBLEM: I cannot “FEEL” this intense personal relationship with Jesus or Mary that many people talk about. I really try but even when I talk to people about religion, they notice that I mainly speak about GOD and not Christ and especially the word JESUS.

I also say the Rosary but the Hail Mary does not seem to do anything for me except that it becomes boring after 53 times.

I do not intend to be a good RC or Christian if I am only going through the motions.

HELP
Click to expand...
Hmmm, though I hesitate to use the word, I feel your pain. I’ve been back to the Church for eleven years and though my faith is deep my feelings don’t follow. My personal relationship with Jesus is more an act of the will than an act of the heart for me. I struggle to develop more of a devotion to Mary. As a Lay Carmelite I’m asked to pray the Rosary daily and it is often a chore but I find solace in knowing I am obedient and I try hard to concentrate on meditating on the mysteries.

I, too, am more likely to speak of the Lord than to invoke the name of Jesus in conversation.

I spend at least two hours in adoration before the Blessed Sacrament each week and still feel almost nothing. I do it anyway.

I can find and feel passion in the words of religious songs I’m asked to sing. I can also feel some passing passion in studying and discussing the Scriptures and other theological/religious writings. Feelings fade, however.

James 1:2-4, 12 “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing. Blessed is the man who remains steadfast (or perseveres) under trial, for when he has stood the test he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him.”

Your lack of feeling is a trial, one that you (and I) must withstand with perseverance. That’s one of the reason’s one of my personal mottoes is “faith is not a feeling.” Faith is an act of the will. You can do this.

Be at peace.
 
The above posters are correct. Many of our Saints did not always feel close to Gid. Obeying God’s commandments, doing His will and serving your neighbor is what counts.
Out of the entire Trinity, I happen to feel closest to God, the Father, so I often pray to Him.

Remember, feelings are unreliable, they come and go.
God bless you.
 
That must be hard when not raised in the Catholic Church, not feeling connected. We need to do reparations for those who have failed to instill in their children a love for their heavenly Mother and Jesus.

We pray these prayers, because we know that these prayers are very pleasing to God. Our Lady has requested the rosary, specifically, in various apparitions, (Lourdes, Fatima, Kiebeho, Akita, etc.).

Here are the 15 promises associated with the rosary, for those who pray it daily.

Now, we know that the angels often pray “repetitious” prayers, (such as “Holy, Holy, Holy” throughout all eternity!). So apparently, there is a place for repetition. Also recall that Christ repeated the same prayer in the Agony in the Garden, three times.

In the Bible, there is a LOT of repetition. One example, “For his mercy endures forever” is repeated 26 times! (Psalms, Chap. 136).

There is also this, catholicbible101.com/therosary.htm which helps explain other questions one might have about the rosary.

Anyway, I wish you luck with your prayer life!

The rosary is a very beautiful prayer. To me, it is also a minicatechism lesson…
 
I think feelings are overrated. They come and go. It’s similar to love. What we often think of love, like romantic love for example, will fade with time. True love, however, will last. True love is that which persists even when one doesn’t “feel” it. It’s a mother getting up in the middle of the night with her screaming child even though she’s exhausted.
 
ClearWater said:
I think feelings are overrated. They come and go. It’s similar to love. What we often think of love, like romantic love for example, will fade with time. True love, however, will last. True love is that which persists even when one doesn’t “feel” it. It’s a mother getting up in the middle of the night with her screaming child even though she’s exhausted.
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I think it was GK Chesterton who wrote that if faith depended on feelings, a headache or stomach upset would render you faithless…

With my chronic illness if I relied on feelings? We are HUMAN. And this is what faith is about FAITH… Paul writes about this; an if we felt all the time that would not BE faith.

Try working for the needs of others. Works wonders… Because then you are living your faith.
 
You may want to attend a Charismatic Mass.

Talk to God like He is your best friend.
 
Thank you all so very much.

I really appreciate your feedback. It is morning here in South Africa and what a Morning. I came to my PC and as usual prayed for the day and then opened my Emails. I was shocked when I saw all the notifications for this Forum.

On coming to the forum, I got tears in my eyes. Thank you all so much**. You have no idea how much all of you have done for my journey in one night.**

I did not know there are others that also struggle with this lack of “feeling”. Maybe not struggle but who understood it much better than i did.

I could never understand how people could talk about Jesus as if he was a personal friend that lived down the road. I know very educated and devout Priests, who LOVES to ask Mother May for help, intercession etc.

They all make/made me feel so Inadequate. I was petrified that I was not Good enough in my praise and worship. I know the “feeling” when I hear or sing songs like Abide With Me, Amazing Grace, Ave Verum etc. I get tears in my eyes and fall to my knees and confess and thank God and Jesus for what they have done for me. Yet music got me deeply emotional but Jesus never did.

I am rambling. I found treasure in each reply. Thank You

Dominic
 
UPDATE:

Our God is so wonderfull.

Minutes after answering to the forum I put on my DAILY RADIO STATION that I listen to during the day.

It is EWTN over the Internet. The speaker was Fr Larry Richards. The fist call he got was a gentleman that asked the very same question I asked when starting this thread.

Fr Larry gave a summary of your replies. He added:

To WANT this feeling is what I want and not necessarily what God wants to GIVE me.

Was this a coincidence? I do not think so.

Albert Einstein said: Coincidence is God working anonymously.
 
9 And I tell you, Ask, and it will be given you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. 10 For every one who asks receives, and he who seeks finds, and to him who knocks it will be opened. 11 What father among you, if his son asks for a fish, will instead of a fish give him a serpent; 12 or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? 13 If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” (Luke 11:9-13)

Ironically in this kind of thing, nothing much that a human an do, only God Himself can help us. Our part is to desire God, like you do, and then ask.

Jesus promised us the Holy Spirit, who will be our Counselor, our Advocate and our Comforter. And the only thing that is guaranteed to be given if we ask, is the Holy Spirit.

Ask for the Holy Spirit, allow Him to move and empower you, to give you the grace to know Jesus in a personal way.

Since Jesus Himself promised that, it is worth a try to just do it. What do you have to lose anyway.

God bless.
 
DominicSA said:
UPDATE:

Our God is so wonderfull.

Minutes after answering to the forum I put on my DAILY RADIO STATION that I listen to during the day.

It is EWTN over the Internet. The speaker was Fr Larry Richards. The fist call he got was a gentleman that asked the very same question I asked when starting this thread.

Fr Larry gave a summary of your replies. He added:

To WANT this feeling is what I want and not necessarily what God wants to GIVE me.

Was this a coincidence? I do not think so.

Albert Einstein said: Coincidence is God working anonymously.
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Yes, indeed. Many people are in love with being in love instead of being in love with a person, in this case, Christ. It’s why we live by faith and not by “sight”/feelings.

It’s evident that you have very deep feelings for Christ and for Mary, my dear. No one who drops to their knees and cries when hearing hymns and spiritual songs is devoid of feelings. 😉 Each of us has our own relationship with Christ, Mary, the Saints and Angels. It could be that being brought up Seventh Day Adventist, you have some emotional blocks against the names of Jesus and Mary. I spent many years in a Pentecostal sect which was very anti-Mary. There was a point in my life when I couldn’t stand to hear her name. Now I love her name, but it took time and prayer and adjusting my thinking to line up with the truth. Give yourself time to immerse yourself in your new beliefs. Feelings may come later–when your mind has caught up with your heart. 🙂
 
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