Can't forgive myself...not sure where to post this

[Delphinus85]

So here is my situation. I was welcomed into the church just a short week ago. Since then I have found my life change drastically for the better. I feel closer to Christ (especially through the eucharist) that I ever have before. I have started attending daily masses, and I am so in love with God!

I have a problem still though.

I can’t forgive myself for what I did as a protestant. I used to give out Jack Chick tracts to catholics. I have tried to find every one of them I could and apologize to them. They have so graciously forgiven me, and I have gone to confession for this. I have found though that some catholics that I interacted with have left the church. I don’t know if I was the cause, but I know I didn’t help.

I went to chick’s website one last time to see if it’s true that he has started hammering catholics more now than ever, and it was true. My heart is breaking. What can I do to get over this horrible thing I did to the members of God’s true church? Now that I am in this church, and I see the immense beauty of it, my heart is breaking. I feel like a traitor! TOTALLY unworthy.

 

[puzzleannie]

I can’t forgive myself for what I did as a protestant. I .

If you have been to confession, as you were required to do before confirmation and first communion, all the sins of your past life have been both forgiven and absolved by God, through the action of the priest. If you deny this truth, because of your own personal feelings of remorse, you are denying the faith you have just professed, and you are making your feelings more important than God’s forgiveness. Remorse and contrition is a quite proper feeling, but if you allow it to make your refusal to “forgive” yourself trump God’s mercy, you are in error. In any case, none of us has the power to forgive ourselves, so it is useless to repine because we can’t.

 

[Contarini]

So here is my situation. I was welcomed into the church just a short week ago. Since then I have found my life change drastically for the better. I feel closer to Christ (especially through the eucharist) that I ever have before. I have started attending daily masses, and I am so in love with God!

I have a problem still though.

I can’t forgive myself for what I did as a protestant. I used to give out Jack Chick tracts to catholics. .

I never gave out Chick tracts (I thought they were crude and vulgar, even when I thought they might be partly accurate), but I did once spray a statue of the Virgin Mary with a water hose!

I was seven (or maybe eight) at the time, if that’s any excuse. Still above the age of accountability, though, if just barely!

Edwin

 

[beckers]

So here is my situation. I was welcomed into the church just a short week ago. Since then I have found my life change drastically for the better. I feel closer to Christ (especially through the eucharist) that I ever have before. I have started attending daily masses, and I am so in love with God!

I have a problem still though.

I can’t forgive myself for what I did as a protestant. I used to give out Jack Chick tracts to catholics. I have tried to find every one of them I could and apologize to them. They have so graciously forgiven me, and I have gone to confession for this. I have found though that some catholics that I interacted with have left the church. I don’t know if I was the cause, but I know I didn’t help.

I went to chick’s website one last time to see if it’s true that he has started hammering catholics more now than ever, and it was true. My heart is breaking. What can I do to get over this horrible thing I did to the members of God’s true church? Now that I am in this church, and I see the immense beauty of it, my heart is breaking. I feel like a traitor! TOTALLY unworthy.

Read Home Sweet home by scott Hann.He actaully talks about how he has the same regrets.

You must let it go. Your experience is an example of just how much you have grown. You have come into the fullness of the truth so now you are called to help those who might fall into the same trap and stand up for the church when you see it being attacked. Your a defender now instead of an attacker!

 

[Catholig]

So here is my situation. I was welcomed into the church just a short week ago. Since then I have found my life change drastically for the better. I feel closer to Christ (especially through the eucharist) that I ever have before. I have started attending daily masses, and I am so in love with God!

I have a problem still though.

I can’t forgive myself for what I did as a protestant. I used to give out Jack Chick tracts to catholics. I have tried to find every one of them I could and apologize to them. They have so graciously forgiven me, and I have gone to confession for this. I have found though that some catholics that I interacted with have left the church. I don’t know if I was the cause, but I know I didn’t help.

I went to chick’s website one last time to see if it’s true that he has started hammering catholics more now than ever, and it was true. My heart is breaking. What can I do to get over this horrible thing I did to the members of God’s true church? Now that I am in this church, and I see the immense beauty of it, my heart is breaking. I feel like a traitor! TOTALLY unworthy.

Non sum(us) dignus…

In any case, I wouldn’t worry too much about it. I really wouldn’t.

Catholig

 

[mercygate]

I can’t forgive myself for what I did as a protestant.** I used to give out Jack Chick tracts to catholics.** . . .

Hey! I’ll bet there are thousands of people who have converted TO Catholicism after reading Jack Chick tracts. They’re so unspeakably ridiculous that an inquiring mind might decide to see for himself what all the fuss is about and then, first thing you know: RCIA!

Lighten up on yourself. You’re home now. Have a laugh at yourself. Big cyber-hug to ya, my brother. :hug3:

I went to chick’s website one last time to see if it’s true that he has started hammering catholics more now than ever, and it was true.

Goody. The more people like that hammer at us, the more we know we must be doing something right.

My heart is breaking. What can I do to get over this horrible thing I did to the members of God’s true church? Now that I am in this church, and I see the immense beauty of it, my heart is breaking. I feel like a traitor! TOTALLY unworthy.

What can you do? Go make a cup of tea and be glad you’re away from that stuff.

 

[irishmac]

I never gave out Chick tracts (I thought they were crude and vulgar, even when I thought they might be partly accurate), but I did once spray a statue of the Virgin Mary with a water hose!

I was seven (or maybe eight) at the time, if that’s any excuse. Still above the age of accountability, though, if just barely!

Edwin

I’ve sprayed my statue of the Virgin Mary with a water hose before, too. But that was to clean the mud and pesky snails from her.

Dominus vobsicum

 

[PapaSquash]

I have a problem still though.

. My heart is breaking. What can I do to get over this horrible thing I did to the members of God’s true church? Now that I am in this church, and I see the immense beauty of it, my heart is breaking. I feel like a traitor! TOTALLY unworthy.

Look at what Saul did before conversion, and we’re all OK with him now.

 

[irishmac]

So here is my situation. I was welcomed into the church just a short week ago. Since then I have found my life change drastically for the better. I feel closer to Christ (especially through the eucharist) that I ever have before. I have started attending daily masses, and I am so in love with God!

Take comfort in the fact that God has forgiven your sins through the sacrament of Confession.

I have a problem still though.

I can’t forgive myself for what I did as a protestant. I used to give out Jack Chick tracts to catholics. I have tried to find every one of them I could and apologize to them. They have so graciously forgiven me, and I have gone to confession for this. I have found though that some catholics that I interacted with have left the church. I don’t know if I was the cause, but I know I didn’t help.

Do your penance and let it go. Or, to help alleviate your fears, you could pass out some of CA’s “Pillar of Fire, Pillar of Truth” tracts. I think that would be good. But, I would not feel guilty that you might have persuaded people to leave the Church when you were Protestant.

I went to chick’s website one last time to see if it’s true that he has started hammering catholics more now than ever, and it was true. My heart is breaking. What can I do to get over this horrible thing I did to the members of God’s true church? Now that I am in this church, and I see the immense beauty of it, my heart is breaking. I feel like a traitor! TOTALLY unworthy.

Each of us are called to discern and follow the Way, the Truth, and the Life. Each person is responsible for their journey.

So, now, trust in the power of Christ’s Divine mercy.

Welcome home!

 

[mahoneyt]

He came to my desk with quivering lip–
The lesson was done.
“Dear Teacher I want a new leaf,” he said,
“I have spoiled this one.”
I took the old leaf, stained and blotted,
And gave him a new one all unspotted,
And into his sad eyes smiled,
“Do better now, my child.”
I went to the throne with a quivering soul–
The old year was done.
“Dear Father, hast Thou a new leaf for me?
I have spoiled this one.”
He took the old leaf, stained and blotted,
And gave me a new one all unspotted,
And into my sad heart smiled,
“Do better now, My child.”
– Kathleen Wheeler

 

[Mijoy2]

I have a problem still though.

I can’t forgive myself for what I did as a protestant. I used to give out Jack Chick tracts to catholics. .

Many of us reverts and converts have been guilty of degrading the Church we now love. Please do not sweat this. You have been fully forgiven and absolved. Trust God will somehow make your past work in His favor.

I used to use every opportunity I could to tell others how “foolish” faith was. I can’t now believe the things I used to do and say. One way I try to look at it now is that these very same people have now witnessed my change of heart and possibly ask themselves what might have brought on such a dramatic change. In other words, hopefully it causes some of them to pause and think. I know that in some cases this is true. Possibly your conversion has helped some people more then your Jack Chick literature hurt them.

 

[Delphinus85]

thank you guys for your encouraging words. You are all great. I am trying to work thought this “with fear and trembling” as seems to be common for christian faith. It’s just so hard!!

 

[mercygate]

thank you guys for your encouraging words. You are all great. I am trying to work thought this “with fear and trembling” as seems to be common for christian faith. It’s just so hard!!

Hey! Day after tomorrow is Divine Mercy Sunday. Take advantage of it and let this stuff LEAVE THE BUILDING!!!

 

[Della]

Welcome home to the Church, dear D! :extrahappy:

I went through the same feelings you are having now when I converted and thought back on all the Catholics I had tried to “bring out” of the Church. I too couldn’t get past it even though I’d confessed it and been forgiven.

So, I prayed about it and it came to me that St. Peter also denied Christ, been forgiven, and went on to fulfill God’s will for his life. Jesus told him that after he’d gone through his terrible trial that he would strengthen his brothers.

I took that verse and applied it to my own situation–God has called me to help others understand the Church and so help them let go of their fears and the misinformation they’ve held onto for so long, and be reconciled to his one true Church.

Perhaps that is what God will call you to do, as well, but whatever he calls you to do in his Church, you will make up for your past mistakes by following Christ in his Church for the remainder of your life. Remember, all is God, and there is nothing but God. Even our sins are nothing compared to God, so give your past to God and go on in faith, hope, and love.

 

[1ke]

Pray to St. Paul… stoner of Christians.

God lifted him up to a special purpose upon his conversion and he’ll do the same for you. Do not wallow in the past, you are forgiven-- move forward.

 

[Tom]

Delphinus, welcome home. Listen we have all done things we will regret for the rest of our lives, trust me you’re not alone. After returning from an excursion to sunny southeast Asia, I lived for years with the thought that God surly couldn’t forgive all that I had done. I never left the Church, but I could never forgive myself. At a retreat I realized that the nagging feeling I had, was not because God hadn’t forgiven me, it was Satan attempting to put me into despair. I meditated on exactly what our Lord, Jesus the Christ, went thru to atone for our sins. How horrible His death, and I realized, in not forgiving myself, I was in essence saying it wasn’t enough. After a lot of soul searching I understood there was absolutely nothing I could have done that His sacrifice wasn’t sufficient to expunge. It’s quite a relief when you finally let go.

 

[wanner47]

You’ve gotten some great advice already. I just wanted to say,
[SIGN]
WELCOME HOME! [/SIGN]

(BTW, I’m a convert from Protestantism too.)

 

[Godfollower]

So here is my situation. I was welcomed into the church just a short week ago. Since then I have found my life change drastically for the better. I feel closer to Christ (especially through the eucharist) that I ever have before. I have started attending daily masses, and I am so in love with God!

I have a problem still though.

I can’t forgive myself for what I did as a protestant. I used to give out Jack Chick tracts to catholics. I have tried to find every one of them I could and apologize to them. They have so graciously forgiven me, and I have gone to confession for this. I have found though that some catholics that I interacted with have left the church. I don’t know if I was the cause, but I know I didn’t help.

I went to chick’s website one last time to see if it’s true that he has started hammering catholics more now than ever, and it was true. My heart is breaking. What can I do to get over this horrible thing I did to the members of God’s true church? Now that I am in this church, and I see the immense beauty of it, my heart is breaking. I feel like a traitor! TOTALLY unworthy.

I used to get so mad at those tracts being shoved under my door, as well as at the people who espoused that nonsense. I couldn’t understand why anyone would believe they were accurate (or even fair, for that matter) – or why people who called themselves Christians could espouse such hatred.

But I forgive you. And, since you’ve been absolved at confession, I know that Jesus forgives you, too. Remember, the first Pope denied Christ three times while He was being betrayed by Judas – and Jesus forgave him, just as He forgave all the other disciples (every one of whom abandoned Him at His betrayal). What you did was nothing compared to that unfaithfulness. You have been forgiven by God; you are now called on to believe in that gift.

Remember, we’re all sinners. We’re all unworthy of His love. But Jesus loves us – and you – anyway. He also asks us to repent, reform our lives, and move forward. You can’t stay on the straight and narrow path if you’re always looking backward. Keep your eyes forward, and resolve as a penance to try to be nice in the future to people with whom you disagree (even – hah! – people who hand you Chick tracts). That’s the best way I know to get over the feelings of guilt you’re still dealing with.

 

[Randy_Carson]

So here is my situation. I was welcomed into the church just a short week ago. Since then I have found my life change drastically for the better. I feel closer to Christ (especially through the eucharist) that I ever have before. I have started attending daily masses, and I am so in love with God!

I have a problem still though.

I can’t forgive myself for what I did as a protestant. I used to give out Jack Chick tracts to catholics. I have tried to find every one of them I could and apologize to them. They have so graciously forgiven me, and I have gone to confession for this. I have found though that some catholics that I interacted with have left the church. I don’t know if I was the cause, but I know I didn’t help.

I went to chick’s website one last time to see if it’s true that he has started hammering catholics more now than ever, and it was true. My heart is breaking. What can I do to get over this horrible thing I did to the members of God’s true church? Now that I am in this church, and I see the immense beauty of it, my heart is breaking. I feel like a traitor!

You’re in good company…St. Paul himself put many in the Church to death.

" ‘Lord,’ I replied, ‘these men know that I went from one synagogue to another to imprison and beat those who believe in you. 20And when the blood of your martyra] Stephen was shed, I stood there giving my approval and guarding the clothes of those who were killing him.’ " (Acts 22:19-20)

But he recognized that God had forgiven him because later he wrote:

“For I am the least of the apostles and do not even deserve to be called an apostle, because I persecuted the church of God. 10But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace to me was not without effect. No, I worked harder than all of them—yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me.” (1 Corinthians 15:9-10)

Focus on God’s grace, and welcome home.

Hope this helps. :tiphat:

 

[kell0618]

You can keep beating yourself up (and by doing so, you are telling God that you know better than He did when He forgave you), or you can be more like St. Paul.

By the way, WELCOME HOME!