Catholic burial

[jmplus2]

Hello, I hope I am doing this right. I am not big on forums but I have heard that this was a good one. We lost a child last month and we want to bury her in our yard. What are the regulations for having her buried here? Do we need to have our land blessed? Thanks for any info you might have.

 

[Karin]

Hello, I hope I am doing this right. I am not big on forums but I have heard that this was a good one. We lost a child last month and we want to bury her in our yard. What are the regulations for having her buried here? Do we need to have our land blessed? Thanks for any info you might have.

first check with your town (health, building dept etc.) see what the ordinances/codes are on this…not all towns allow people to be buried in their yard…

Also I am sorry for your loss.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

Hello, I hope I am doing this right. I am not big on forums but I have heard that this was a good one. We lost a child last month and we want to bury her in our yard. What are the regulations for having her buried here? Do we need to have our land blessed? Thanks for any info you might have.

As far as I know as long as you meet all the local regulations, The grave can be blessed by your pastor, however a Catholic cemetary would be best.

 

[boppysbud]

I can’t think of any location that actually allows for burial on private property, but requires burial in legally registered cemetaries.

What if you change your mind later, and decide to sell your house and move?

In some states it may be legal to scatter cremated ashes on private property, but you still have to check into the local laws.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

I can’t think of any location that actually allows for burial on private property, but requires burial in legally registered cemetaries.

What if you change your mind later, and decide to sell your house and move?

In some states it may be legal to scatter cremated ashes on private property, but you still have to check into the local laws.

But the Catholic Church does not allow the scattering of ashes anywhere.

 

[Karin]

In some states it may be legal to scatter cremated ashes on private property, but you still have to check into the local laws.

The Church does not allow the scattering of ashes

 

[Joe_Kelley]

My brother’s daughter’s baby died at birth. They are going to bury her ashes under the stone on their cemetary plot. I think this is becoming a common custom.

 

[boppysbud]

Hello, I hope I am doing this right. I am not big on forums but I have heard that this was a good one. We lost a child last month and we want to bury her in our yard. What are the regulations for having her buried here? Do we need to have our land blessed? Thanks for any info you might have.

I just now noticed this, she died LAST MONTH and still has not been buried? Are you for real or is this some kind of wierd halloween joke that is in terrible taste? The best kind of embalming only allows a corpse to be unburried a week or so at the best.

 

[Br.Rich_SFO]

I just now noticed this, she died LAST MONTH and still has not been buried? Are you for real or is this some kind of wierd halloween joke that is in terrible taste? The best kind of embalming only allows a corpse to be unburried a week or so at the best.

Last month was only a week ago.

 

[Karin]

Last month was only a week ago.

It seems like it (Novemeber) is further along than what it is

 

[boppysbud]

Just one week or much less is all that it takes for a dead body to go “bad”.

Embalming is not intended to make a corpse last forever,
just long enough to get it in the ground, and make it look pretty in order to sell more expensive coffins, which in most cases is way less than a full week.

An honest undertaker will tell you that the more natural and pretty a corpse looks, the shorter the time it will “keep”.

Does anyone remember how the late Holy Father John Paul II was looking toward the end, I can just imagine how he was smelling by then.

 

[John_Lilburne]

Hello, I hope I am doing this right. I am not big on forums but I have heard that this was a good one. We lost a child last month and we want to bury her in our yard. What are the regulations for having her buried here? Do we need to have our land blessed? Thanks for any info you might have.

Yes, a blessing would be needed. A priest will have the book with all the prayers for the funeral.

According to the Code of Canon Law, canon 1240:
Ҥ1. The Church is to have its own cemeteries wherever this can be done, or at least spaces in civil cemeteries destined for the faithful departed and properly blessed.
§2. If however, this cannot be achieved, individual graves are to be properly blessed as often as needed.”
(Code of Canon Law: Latin-English Edition, Canon Law Society of America, 1995, ISBN 0943616204.)

The prayer said is in the Order of Christian Funerals, n. 218, 321 and 405.

There is a choice of prayers “if the place of committal is to be blessed”.
A. “O God, by whose mercy the faithful departed find rest, bless this grave, and send your holy angel to watch over it.
As we bury here the body of N., welcome him/her into your presence, that he/she may rejoice in you with your saints for ever.
We ask this through Christ our Lord.
R. Amen”

B. “Lord Jesus Christ, by your own three days in the tomb, you hallowed the graves of all who believe in you and so made the grave a sign of hope that promises resurrection even as it claims our mortal bodies.
Grant that our brother/sister may sleep here in peace until you awaken him/her to glory, for you are the resurrection and the life.
Then he/she will see you face to face and in your light will see light and know the spendor of God, for you live and reign for ever and ever.
R. Amen.”

C. “Almighty God, you created the earth and shaped the vault of heaven; you fixed the stars in their places. When you were caught in the snares of death you set us free through baptism; in obedience to your will our Lord Jesus Christ broke the fetters of hell and rose to life, bringing deliverance and resurrection to those who are his by faith. In your mercy look upon this grave, so that your servant may sleep here in peace; and on the day of judgment raise him/her up to dwell with your saints in paradise.
We ask this through Christ our Lord.
R. Amen.”

or D. “God of endless ages, through disobedience to your law we fell from grace and death entered the world; but through the obedience and resurrection of your Son you revealed to us a new life. You granted Abraham, our father in faith, a burial place in the promised land; you prompted Joseph of Arimathea to offer his own tomb for the burial of the Lord. In a spirit of repentance we earnestly ask you to look upon this grave and bless it, so that, while we commit to the earth the body of your servant N. his/her sould may be taken into paradise.
We ask this through Christ our Lord.
R. Amen”
(The Rites Volume One, Liturgical Press, 1990, ISBN: 0-8146-6015-0, page 1101).

 

[Karin]

John your assuming that his town/city will allow him to bury a person in his yard.

Yes, a blessing would be needed. A priest will have the book with all the prayers for the funeral.

According to the Code of Canon Law, canon 1240:
Ҥ1. The Church is to have its own cemeteries wherever this can be done, or at least spaces in civil cemeteries destined for the faithful departed and properly blessed.
§2. If however, this cannot be achieved, individual graves are to be properly blessed as often as needed.”
(Code of Canon Law: Latin-English Edition, Canon Law Society of America, 1995, ISBN 0943616204.)

The prayer said is in the Order of Christian Funerals, n. 218, 321 and 405.

There is a choice of prayers “if the place of committal is to be blessed”.
A. “O God, by whose mercy the faithful departed find rest, bless this grave, and send your holy angel to watch over it.
As we bury here the body of N., welcome him/her into your presence, that he/she may rejoice in you with your saints for ever.
We ask this through Christ our Lord.
R. Amen”

B. “Lord Jesus Christ, by your own three days in the tomb, you hallowed the graves of all who believe in you and so made the grave a sign of hope that promises resurrection even as it claims our mortal bodies.
Grant that our brother/sister may sleep here in peace until you awaken him/her to glory, for you are the resurrection and the life.
Then he/she will see you face to face and in your light will see light and know the spendor of God, for you live and reign for ever and ever.
R. Amen.”

C. “Almighty God, you created the earth and shaped the vault of heaven; you fixed the stars in their places. When you were caught in the snares of death you set us free through baptism; in obedience to your will our Lord Jesus Christ broke the fetters of hell and rose to life, bringing deliverance and resurrection to those who are his by faith. In your mercy look upon this grave, so that your servant may sleep here in peace; and on the day of judgment raise him/her up to dwell with your saints in paradise.
We ask this through Christ our Lord.
R. Amen.”

or D. “God of endless ages, through disobedience to your law we fell from grace and death entered the world; but through the obedience and resurrection of your Son you revealed to us a new life. You granted Abraham, our father in faith, a burial place in the promised land; you prompted Joseph of Arimathea to offer his own tomb for the burial of the Lord. In a spirit of repentance we earnestly ask you to look upon this grave and bless it, so that, while we commit to the earth the body of your servant N. his/her sould may be taken into paradise.
We ask this through Christ our Lord.
R. Amen”
(The Rites Volume One, Liturgical Press, 1990, ISBN: 0-8146-6015-0, page 1101).

 

[boppaid]

Was it a stillbirth or miscarriage?

 

[CRW]

Hello, I hope I am doing this right. I am not big on forums but I have heard that this was a good one. We lost a child last month and we want to bury her in our yard. What are the regulations for having her buried here? Do we need to have our land blessed? Thanks for any info you might have.

My concern would be what happens when we decide to move, always a probability. Or when we depart this earth, what happens to the property? Will the new owners appreciate their yard is also a graveyard?

Sorry for your loss and may our Lord be with you and your child.

 

[mercygate]

Hello, I hope I am doing this right. I am not big on forums but I have heard that this was a good one. We lost a child last month and we want to bury her in our yard. What are the regulations for having her buried here? Do we need to have our land blessed? Thanks for any info you might have.

I sympathize with your loss.

Was this loss a miscarriage at home? If not, where has the body been all this time? If it was a stillbirth in hospital, the hospital could have helped you. Following that, and a mortuary would know the answers.

This is not a pet hamster. If you sell your house, will you tell the new owners or will you dig her up and take her with you? Pardon my glibness here but there is more to this than you may be accounting for in the freshness of your grief.

 

[dkoinzan]

I am so sorry for your loss. I have lost two preborn children this year. The first child we had graveside rites with a priest and she was buried in a cemetary. She is buried between my husbands grandparents. This cost us a couple of thousand dollars.

My second child I had last week at 16 weeks. My husband is not Catholic. He at one point thought about joining, until the he witnessed some awful behavior from the priest and members of my parish. This happened during the death of our daughter.

We have no money for the burial. I desparately want him with his sister. My husband is not pleased with the priest and doesn’t want him near the child’s body.

When my son was born I called for the priest to come. He couldn’t be reached. He knew I would be miscarring again. In the end I took Holy Water and blessed my son and gave him a kiss good-bye. I sprinkled Holy water on the ground of my garden a placed my son under my statue of St. Theresa.

I HATE THIS SITUATION!!! I am hoping to be able to slip his little box under his sister’s headstone once it is finished.

Please don’t judge people in their grief. You can not immagine the pain! It is so hard to walk off the OB floor with your memory box. Letting go of that child is like tearing out a piece of yourself.
I unite my sorrows to those of Jesus and Mary. I have offered up all my pain for the parish and the Priest. I ask my children in heaven to pray nonstop for their family. I have three children to raise and am doing the best I can to just get through the day.

I know how jmplus2 feels and I hope you find some answers and a solution you can live with.

God Bless.