Is it possible to be Catholic and not be in accordance with all of the churchs teachings?
Say for example, believing that embrionic stem cell research is ok/good.
My girlfriend believes this and she is catholic, however I find it hard understanding how this is possible. I find it hard knowing what to say to her, or saying what i think in a way which will not hurt her. I care for her very much and do not want to break up with her, but it seems that that may be the direction it is heading.
Is it possible to be Catholic and not be in accordance with all of the churchs teachings?
Say for example, believing that embrionic stem cell research is ok/good.
My girlfriend believes this and she is catholic, however I find it hard understanding how this is possible. I find it hard knowing what to say to her, or saying what i think in a way which will not hurt her. I care for her very much and do not want to break up with her, but it seems that that may be the direction it is heading.
You can find some good information on-line at Catholic sites to explain to her the correct teaching. Perhaps she is not completely informed of why it is not acceptable. (about the embryonic stem-cell research).
There are acceptable ways to get stem cells from adults that can be used in research. In fact, recently there was a success story with regard to adult stem cells, although I cannot recall the details from memory.
A practicing Catholic needs to continually inform his/herself about what the Church teaches and why. That is how we correctly inform our conscience.
if she does understand why the church believes it is wrong and still believes it is ok, do you think it is possible to be in a relationship with someone like this.
Is it possible to be Catholic and not be in accordance with all of the churchs teachings?
Say for example, believing that embrionic stem cell research is ok/good.
My girlfriend believes this and she is catholic, however I find it hard understanding how this is possible. I find it hard knowing what to say to her, or saying what i think in a way which will not hurt her. I care for her very much and do not want to break up with her, but it seems that that may be the direction it is heading.
I would say she could identify as “Catholic” but she certainly isn’t in line with Church teaching. Not knowing her personality, I couldn’t recommend any one way to approach this with her, flat out telling her that may be in mortal error could push her away completely from the Church. We must adminsh the sinner, but I wouldn’t necessarily suggest using a large stick unless you think that would work.
I myself was a “cafeteria” or “cultural” Catholic. God thankfully opened my eyes and heart to the Truth. That is the only way anyone is converted, through God’s grace.
I also had a special person in my life that carefully and patiently helped me see the errors of my thinking by listening, not preaching, and making me think of other ways to see the issues in which I was in error.
Maybe you too could be that person, carefully and patiently explaining Church teaching in a logical and prayerful way, so that she can make up her mind that she’s wrong on at least one issue. It will take time and effort, but only you know whether that is time and effort you are willing to put into this particular relationship.
Good luck and prayers to you and your friend.
if she does understand why the church believes it is wrong and still believes it is ok, do you think it is possible to be in a relationship with someone like this.
It is hard for me to give a definite yes or no answer to this. You should pray about it. Also, there may be other areas in which she is not in keeping with what the Church teaches that you would need to know about before becoming seriously committed.
if she does understand why the church believes it is wrong and still believes it is ok, do you think it is possible to be in a relationship with someone like this.
She thinks it’s okay to kill babies for their body parts.
It’s totally up to you, but I would have a hard time living with someone who understood the implications of this stuff, and still thought it was okay.
It would be important to make sure that she really does understand what it means, rather than just asking her, “Do you understand what this means?” and having her respond, “Yes, I’m not an idiot, you know.” Maybe she thinks that the babies are already dead, or maybe she doesn’t know that they are still considered human beings, even if they are not in the womb. Hopefully, that is the case, and once it is explained to her that they are human beings who have souls, and that they did nothing to deserve to be killed for their body parts (we don’t even do that to child molestors), she might review her stand on this issue.
if she does understand why the church believes it is wrong and still believes it is ok, do you think it is possible to be in a relationship with someone like this.
You have posed a very tough question and one that only you can answer. We can all give advice, but in the end, the decision is yours.
The only thing I would add is that not being in full union with the church for the years to come will be a very hard burden to bear. If your girlfriend is not aware of the tenets of the church, then explain them to her, with kindness and love. If she does not accept the truth, then you do have a problem. Things are exciting now and love is in the air. But as you live together in marriage and you do not agree on something so important, it has a profound effect on the whole marriage.
I will remember you in prayer. God guide you to make the right choice.
By explaining the Church’s teachings in a way that she will have the most understanding. Which most likely for you means knowing them pretty well yourself.
I would say also that it doesn’t mean explaining something if you yourself don’t really know much about it. I think it’s also a “witness” to acknowledge that you don’t know but you give yourself up to the wisdom of the Church until you understand why the Church teaches that particular thing.
Only God can change hearts and minds, so it’s also important to pray for your friend that she will humble herself before God and change her mind.
Only you know whether that is the kind of committment and responsibility you want to bear. Good luck.
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