Catholic Marriage in Boston

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ABostonCatholic

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This is from [my own blog](http://bostonnow.com/community/blogs/(name removed by moderator)/):

The Boston Herald reported today that Catholic marriages (presumably those performed and sanctioned by the Catholic Church) in Boston have decreased from 12,314 in 1984 to 4,820 in 2004. The article gives no reasons for the drop, the rate of which is higher than the national average. I’m sure that the usual suspects of divorce, cohabitation, and gay marriage are all factors, but the greatest is poor catechises and ignorance among Catholics of the Christian meaning of marriage. The pro-gay marriage activists are right when they ask, “How does my marriage affect the sanctity of yours?” Even if it does, it shouldn’t. Catholics should know that the meaning of marriage in Catholic and Biblical theology is that it is a Covenant between man, wife, and God, which imitates the relationship between Christ, the Church, and the Father. What the rest of the world does shouldn’t matter. (Isn’t that what the whole “In the world, not of the world” means?)

According to Terrence C. Donilon, a spokesman for the archdiocese, there is an effort under way to increase Mass attendance, baptisms, and marriages. What those efforts are, I do not know. But I hope Cardinal O’Malley is taking note of Pope Benedict’s address to the Bishops of Mali. As cited in the L’Osservatore Romano (30-May-2007) the pope said,
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“Indeed, when the number of Christian marriages remains relatively small, it is the Church’s duty to help the baptized, especially the young, to understand the beauty and dignity of this Sacrament in Christian life. In response to the frequently expressed fear of the definitive character of marriage, a sound preparation with the collaboration of lay people and experts may thereby enable Christian couples to stay faithful to their marriage vows. They will become aware that the faithfulness of the spouses and the indissolubility of their covenant, whose model is the faithfulness shown by God in the indestructible Covenant which he himself contracted with man, are a source of happiness to those who marry…A human and Christian education imparted from infancy and based on the parents’ example will enable children to receive the seeds of faith and will allow them to develop within them.”
Again, the issue is proper catechises. If the archdiocese is trying to increase marriages without teaching people what it’s all about, then too many of these marriages will quickly lead to divorce. From religious ed. courses, to homilies, the meaning of Christian marriage must be delivered. This can (and perhaps should) be done without touching on the political issue of civil unions/gay marriage. And who knows? Maybe it’ll filter out into the rest of society.
 
ABostonCatholic said:
This is from [my own blog](http://bostonnow.com/community/blogs/(name removed by moderator)/):

The Boston Herald reported today that Catholic marriages (presumably those performed and sanctioned by the Catholic Church) in Boston have decreased from 12,314 in 1984 to 4,820 in 2004. The article gives no reasons for the drop, the rate of which is higher than the national average. I’m sure that the usual suspects of divorce, cohabitation, and gay marriage are all factors, but the greatest is poor catechises and ignorance among Catholics of the Christian meaning of marriage. The pro-gay marriage activists are right when they ask, “How does my marriage affect the sanctity of yours?” Even if it does, it shouldn’t. Catholics should know that the meaning of marriage in Catholic and Biblical theology is that it is a Covenant between man, wife, and God, which imitates the relationship between Christ, the Church, and the Father. What the rest of the world does shouldn’t matter. (Isn’t that what the whole “In the world, not of the world” means?)

According to Terrence C. Donilon, a spokesman for the archdiocese, there is an effort under way to increase Mass attendance, baptisms, and marriages. What those efforts are, I do not know. But I hope Cardinal O’Malley is taking note of Pope Benedict’s address to the Bishops of Mali. As cited in the L’Osservatore Romano (30-May-2007) the pope said,

“Indeed, when the number of Christian marriages remains relatively small, it is the Church’s duty to help the baptized, especially the young, to understand the beauty and dignity of this Sacrament in Christian life. In response to the frequently expressed fear of the definitive character of marriage, a sound preparation with the collaboration of lay people and experts may thereby enable Christian couples to stay faithful to their marriage vows. They will become aware that the faithfulness of the spouses and the indissolubility of their covenant, whose model is the faithfulness shown by God in the indestructible Covenant which he himself contracted with man, are a source of happiness to those who marry…A human and Christian education imparted from infancy and based on the parents’ example will enable children to receive the seeds of faith and will allow them to develop within them.”

Again, the issue is proper catechises. If the archdiocese is trying to increase marriages without teaching people what it’s all about, then too many of these marriages will quickly lead to divorce. From religious ed. courses, to homilies, the meaning of Christian marriage must be delivered. This can (and perhaps should) be done without touching on the political issue of civil unions/gay marriage. And who knows? Maybe it’ll filter out into the rest of society.
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Remember that Boston is ground zero for progressive secularist…are these stats reflective of the rest of the country?
 
The number of weddings is steadily decreasing in our parish, and in the area I think.
 
My wife does marriage prep at our church. I would offer a few additional “reasons” for a decrease such as this.
  1. I all her years of marriage prep, very few were Catholics getting married to Catholics. The vast majority are Catholics or lapsed Catholics getting married to someone of another or no denomination. Very often they are only getting married in the Catholic Church to please grandma. I’m sure many others tell grandma to get over it and marry where they please.
  2. Most are college graduates just starting out. They are busy, live far from home and most complain about all the “hoops” they have to jump through to get a Catholic wedding (FOCCUS evaluation, pre Cana, classes, meeting with the priest). I imagine many just decide this is too inconvenient and take an easier route.
  3. Many want to get married in the woods at a state park or some other location other than the Church. The Catholic church doesn’t accomodate this alternative so they hire a Unitarian minister and it is done.
So yes, improper catechises is this root cause. That said there is little you can do once they are adults. The Church lost these souls years ago when they had the chance to teach them.

Nohome
 
Hmm, well the opposite is the case here in London- we have record numbers of couples going through the engagement catechesis programme 7 it’s a source of great joy! So the secularists aren’t winning everywhere!! 👍
 
Titus said:
Hmm, well the opposite is the case here in London- we have record numbers of couples going through the engagement catechesis programme 7 it’s a source of great joy! So the secularists aren’t winning everywhere!! 👍
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Praise the Lord!
 
Thank you, Titus - getting your good news is a welcome relief from the shocking statistic in the first post.
 
Nohome said:
. . .
So yes, improper catechises is this root cause. That said there is little you can do once they are adults. The Church lost these souls years ago when they had the chance to teach them.

Nohome
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I had one in my adult Confirmation class who had gone through eight years of Catholic School, but for some reason had not gone to the Confirmation ceremony. She was married outside the church because no one had ever told her that she should be married in the Church. No one in her family had ever bothered to get married in the Church. Knowing the school she went to I believe her. :rolleyes:
 
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