Catholic with severe OCD help?

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2014taylorj

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Hello, I’m an 18 year old catholic with severe OCD. I have recently been suffering with intrusive thoughts and anxieties that I have desecrated the eucharist and thus excommunicated myself. When I was at mass the other day I took holy communion, and when the blessed sacrement was in my mouth I was in the process of breaking it in order to make it easier to swallow, when I stopped. I have been plagued with anxiety and doubt that the reason I was about to break the host was due to some kind of a sacriligeous motive, as I experienced an intrusive thought at that same moment and thus I am now uncertain whether me nearly breaking the host was me impulsively acting on the intrusive thought or not. I honestly don’t know what to do, I am uncertain whether I impulsivley acted on an intrusive thought to or whether this is my OCD. Can someone please help, have I excommunicated myself?
 
You are not expected to swallow the host whole and breaking it in your mouth is ok. From a practical standpoint, it is customary to eat it similarly to a regular piece of bread, chewing and so on to swallow it.

You should seek psychological treatment for your OCD and when you begin having obsessive negative thoughts, be prepared with something alternative to shift your thoughts to. For example, when such thoughts enter your mind, silently focus on praying your favorite prayer. Perhaps the Hail Mary. I find the Glory Be particularly beautiful and reassuring as another suggestion.
 
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Thank you. I must say though, that the thoughts OCD suffers have are involuntary, and the more one tries to banish the thoughts from your mind the more they come back.
 
My understanding is that a primary strategy for managing obsessive thoughts is, rather than trying not to think of something, to instead deliberately change the tape and think of something else.

Professional help should be sought and medication may be an option as well.
 
ok. but what if I did impulsively act on that intrusive thought, am I excommunicated then?
 
My friend, your best course of action is to speak to your pastor and your doctor. We will all be praying for you
 
OCD needs treatment. See your doctor. Be assured that were you to become and atheist you would still have OCD, only you would not be worrying about religious things. It’s your brain. Many priests now have a good understanding of the science here and will be able to suggest appropriate professional to you.
 
Breaking the host in your mouth is almost an involuntary reflex that happens when anything is too large to be swallowed whole. It certainly wasn’t a deliberate act of blasphemy. OCD is never deliberately planned out. It’s an affliction. God knows that, so don’t worry about it.

If you are concerned that this might happen again, a way to avoid it is to hold the host in your mouth until it begins to dissolve on its own. It does, after a few minutes. Then you can swallow it whole without any difficulty.

OCD can make life a living hell. So please, do get help. And you haven’t committed anything that would get you excommunicated.
 
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