Catholicism is too structured?

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If I were you, I would invite her to go with me to Adoration. In that silence, if she opens her heart and talks to God, she will be changed. She might not, but worth trying.
 
Yes, the Catholic Church is structured, both in a hierarchical institution sense, and also in the sense that one must conform their life to the Gospel message in accordance with Catholic teaching.

However, there is great freedom within this expansive world of the Catholic faith. There are many devotionals, prayers, spirituality types, saints to follow, etc. to enrich one’s faith life.
 
Perhaps I should have added, to my previous post, that some people are more amenable to the rational approach. I’m all for it myself.
I agree with this statement.
However, in this particular case that the OP states, I don’t think someone whose main complaint about Catholicism is the structure of the worship is really interested in logic and proof, because their concern seems to be an emotional one rather than “I don’t agree with the dogma of XYZ” etc.

Many people are not deep thinkers about religion or philosophy and don’t want to be.
 
Do you suppose there are any top bodybuilders or fitness professionals who don’t have structured workout plans and diets? They structure these aspects of their lives because they know that if they just workout when they want to and eat what they feel like eating, they will never excel in their pursuits.

Similar, saints want to excel in holiness. Structure helps them do this.
 
Back in Santo Domingo, my wife attended a Pentecostal church. People would dance and jump and wave their hands. The pastor would start shouting a single word for emphasis again and again, then the trumpet would start up, and the pastor would do a little ditty in the middle of his sermon… then a visiting “prophetess” would walk through the aisles screaming BAM and whole lines of people would collapse to the floor, allegedly “slain” by the Spirit. No, you will never find anything in Catholicism that meets the theatrical value of such a service… what you will find is the real, true, abiding sacrificial presence of Christ.
 
The Holy Spirit does the work of God on God’s timeline, not ours.

“… sanctify Christ as Lord in your hearts. Always be ready to give an explanation to anyone who asks you for a reason for your hope, but do it with gentleness and reverence, keeping your conscience clear, so that, when you are maligned, those who defame your good conduct in Christ may themselves be put to shame.” 1 Peter 3:15-16

Why do you think what you have said is not “working”? Because her jaw didn’t immediately drop and she didn’t instantly say, “oh, wow, that makes so much sense, you are right?”

Of course when we answer, we imagine such a thing could happen, it is normal to hope for that, but it usually doesn’t happen that way. The stories of deep and lasting conversion are rarely so sudden. Don’t be discouraged or think that nothing has happened in her heart because she doesn’t instantly accept what you say. Be more concerned that what you do agrees with what you say. After that, the Holy Spirit “has got this.” You don’t need to be concerned about making it happen.
 
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Are you familiar with the Old Testament and how stories and events pointed forward to when Christ would come? The 2 of you might be discussing this one day over a coffee.
This image of Moses and the burning bush is one of my favorites…
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This is what Catholics have in the Blessed Sacrament.
Jesus, as we know, hid his divinity when he was born in Bethlehem. He didn’t want us to be afraid of approaching him, and also in the Eucharist. This image was given to us in the Old Testament so we could appreciate what is hidden in our Catholic churches today.

If only we had a magic wand so that those Christians that already love Jesus and love to pray would realize that Jesus is there in the Blessed Sacrament waiting for their visit. Pray for this and may God make it so!
 
Ask her to consider the following:

In ancient Israel, you would attend Synagogue on Shabbat, and offer sacrifice in the Temple during the various feasts at minimum, offering additional sacrifices if you had to or wanted to.

In the New Covenant, Christ’s Church, the Catholic Church, has combined the two. The Sacrifice of the Mass is preceded by teaching, and both occur within the same service (generally). Both sacrifice and teaching had structure during (and before) the time of Christ, and He challenged neither. He submitted to circumcision, honored the Jewish feasts with their accompanying sacrifices, and attended synagogue. If Jesus didn’t despise structure, why should we?
 
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