Catholics and sex therapy

[brinkedge]

Is it OK for a married Catholic woman to have sex therapy which includes masturbation?

The problem in question is lack of enjoyment of sex and orgasm difficulties (I’m a married woman who has been a Catholic for 13 years; my husband has no religious belief). The standard sex therapy which you get on our UK National Health Service includes various ‘homework’ exercises for increasing body knowledge and responsiveness, including genital self-touching and masturbation.

I would like to know whether it is OK or not for a Catholic to take part in this form of therapy.

 

[smichhertz]

Masturbation is a grave evil (mortal sin) so you should not do it, regardless of your intentions.

If you could just skip out on the sinful homework, I think you would be fine to do the therapy. It may be worthwhile to talk to your therapist and work out a plan that won’t involve committing sin.

Here is the official quote from the Catechism of the Catholic Church on the matter. I think it sums up the issue fairly well:

2352 By masturbation is to be understood the deliberate stimulation of the genital organs in order to derive sexual pleasure. “Both the Magisterium of the Church, in the course of a constant tradition, and the moral sense of the faithful have been in no doubt and have firmly maintained that masturbation is an intrinsically and gravely disordered action.” “The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason, outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose.” For here sexual pleasure is sought outside of “the sexual relationship which is demanded by the moral order and in which the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love is achieved.”

I wish you the best, I’ll be sure to say a prayer for you!

 

[twoangels]

I’m someone who suffered from vaginismus. The only treatments for vaginismus involve sex therapy. The thing is, without the treatment, I would be incapable of having intercourse with my husband at all. That said, I never gave into the direction to masturbate.

In my opinion, it really isn’t necessary. The only reason I think they advocate it so much is that they believe that its easier to learn to enjoy sexual pleasure by yourself than with another person - that is to say that you might have some hang ups that make you embarrassed to experience the pleasure with your spouse. That and I think that they find its easier for the woman to direct the man in how to do things than for the man to figure it out on his own when the woman has absolutely no clue about what she may like or dislike.

If you’re going to go to a therapist, I’d just tell them that masturbation is out of the quesiton. If they give you a weird look and act like “Well then this isn’t going to work.” then I wouldn’t go back to them.