Catholics vow to raise children catholic

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Dandelion52737

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Hello, I believe different from my parents who are catholic. I would like to attend a different church, however I am not 18 yet. I had my confirmation, but I didn’t want it. Is it a sin for my parents to let me attend a different church? Even though I’m their vows they were told to raise their children in the faith? Since I’ve had my confirmation doesn’t that mean I’m now eligible to make that decision for myself (since it’s suppose to be my choice to get confirmed catholic).
 
Dandelion52737 said:
Hello, I believe different from my parents who are catholic. I would like to attend a different church, however I am not 18 yet. I had my confirmation, but I didn’t want it.
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I am sorry you feel that way. I’d encourage you to make an appointment with your priest to discuss your issues and seek spiritual guidance.
Dandelion52737 said:
Is it a sin for my parents to let me attend a different church?
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Your parents made a vow and have a serious obligation to raise you in the Catholic faith.
Respect your parents and obey them while you are a minor and under their authority.

If you want to make different choices when you are older, then you can do so.
Dandelion52737 said:
Since I’ve had my confirmation doesn’t that mean I’m now eligible to make that decision for myself
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No.
Dandelion52737 said:
since it’s suppose to be my choice to get confirmed catholic
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Well, Catholics are obligated to come forward for confirmation at the appropriate time. If you could not do so at the time, it should have been delayed.

But confirmation is not a “choice” to be Catholic. You are already Catholic by virtue of your baptism.

I encourage you to talk to your parents and for pastor.
 
Respect your parent and keep the peace until you are 18. Once 18, still treat your parents with respect but make your own decisions with regards to religion.
 
If you’re under 18 you need to do what your parents say.

We do not advise minors on CAF to disobey or disrespect their parents, unless perhaps it’s some kind of a child abuse situation, which this is not.
 
I think the answers, so far, have been pretty accurate.

At this time, you should obey your parents choice.

You should research why the Church believes certain things, though. The things you feel you disagree with may take time to learn about. Read articles (more than one) about those matters.

Is there a denomination you are interested in? There are a couple of basic rules, regarding participation in separated Churches. We dont take their Communion meal, and we dont substitute their service for a Mass.

Perhaps your parents would permit you to participate in non-Catholic service, if you assure them you respect those two principles?

It’s ok to be curious. I am a convert from being raised Evangelical. I did seek into the Catholic faith as an adult. And it wasnt just by going to a Mass, but listening to Catholic apologies, and reading things.

I just encourage you to study right now. Be patient. Pray about it. Learn why we believe, profess, and practice what we do.

Many things Catholics practice are not necessary to practice, or even believe. And others are grounded in Apostolic Tradition.

I hope the best for your spiritual journey. Hopefully you have a long way to go, with profound experiences!

I am of the strong opinion that Confirmation, especially when received at the age of 16, should be fully consented to. I’m sorry you felt forced.

I also know that there are many “cultural” and “cafeteria” Catholics among us, and it can be a real turn off, which seems to translate into feeling like our Teachings and beliefs are superficial. Try not to fall into that deception. It’s the members who are not understanding and embracing, but only going through outward motions and picking and choosing what they accept from God and what they reject.

It’s good that you are seeking God and desire to love and worship Him, and have Him in your life and you in His. It’s a struggle for all of us to put Him first.
 
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However, your feelings about Confirmation are not the teachings of Holy Mother Church. This parallel to of Confirmation to a Protestant “believer’s baptism” is not uncommon. Remember, the Sacraments of Initiation are consented to by the parents around the world and from the very beginning. Infants can and do receive the Sacrament of Confirmation.
 
When Confirmation, or any Sacrament, is offered after the age of reason, parents cannot consent. The candidates do themselves.

I didnt claim the Sacraments cannot be given to infants.

My point, is that I dont believe Confirmation (or any Sacrament) should be given without willful consent of a candidate at the age of reason.

No one is talking about infants here.

You should talk to your priest about this. 😉
 
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Ammi said:
My point, is that I dont believe Confirmation (or any Sacrament) should be given without willful consent of a candidate at the age of reason.
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This is true, but Confirmation is not about “making a decision to be Catholic” .
This is why I believe why we should go back to doing all three to infants, like they do in the Eastern Church. There is far too much misunderstanding as to what Confirmation really is and far too much “hoop jumping” for older kids who are seeking Confirmation.

Catechesis is important, but the grace of the Sacraments of Initiation are more important.
 
+1…wait until you’re 18 and out of the house.

You can still love and respect your parents, but at that point church attendance is more in your hands.
 
That’s fine to have that opinion.

But as the way things are done here (which I prefer) catechesis is recognized as not just important, but necessary. The catechism even uses the word ‘necessary’.

Most Catholics already recognize a lack of proper and strong education in today’s Church. The number of annulments is evidence of that too.
 
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Your parents made promises at your baptism, that is different than a vow.

Thing about Catholicism, we are encouraged to use our reason to know the truth.

You may want to do some reading over at StrangeNotions.com
 
I never said Catechesis was not important. I just don’t believe in holding Sacraments of Initiation hostage until a kid jumps through hoops imposed by well-meaning but misguided religious educators.
 
I guess I dont see catechesis as “jumping through hoops”.
 
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Catechesis is one thing.
Requiring a 2 year program to be Confirmed that includes 3 retreats, multiple service projects and personal interview that feels like the Inquisition to most kids is not ‘catechesis’, it’s hoop jumping.
 
And yet there are STILL young people who felt coerced to receive Confirmation against their desire! I’ve heard it before. And it’s what this OP has expressed. What I have never heard, is a young person expressing desire to receive before the common administration.

But it would be interesting to know if a candidate would be able to appeal for an earlier reception. It’s quite possible they would be granted, no?

When I was seeking Baptism as an adult, I was told that I did not need to go through the RCIA program. I was told I could join the group ready to receive. I chose to wait until the next Easter vigil and enjoy the educational fellowship. I did not see it as a time of “hostage”. The Spirit was not withheld from me, so to speak, but preparing me.
 
Ammi said:
And yet there are STILL young people who felt coerced to receive Confirmation against their desire! I’ve heard it before. And it’s what this OP has expressed. What I have never heard, is a young person expressing desire to receive before the common administration.
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Which would not happen if the Latin Church did not separate the Sacraments of Initiation.
Ammi said:
But it would be interesting to know if a candidate would be able to appeal for an earlier reception. It’s quite possible they would be granted, no?
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In my diocese, this would be a big, fat NO!
Our former Bishop allowed priest/pastors to decide the norms for Sacraments in their parish’s so long as they followed certain norms set by him. We had some parishes do “restored order” where Confirmation and First Communion were dont at the same time, usually around 3-4th grade. We had some parishes that waited until the 6th grade, and one that incorporated its teen programming into Confirmation prep so the kids were in 10th grade.
Ammi said:
When I was seeking Baptism as an adult,
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Apples & oranges. Children of Catholics are expected to be raised Catholic, that includes all the Sacraments of Initiation.
Converts are treated differently, for obvious reasons.
 
CilladeRoma said:
Which would not happen if the Latin Church did not separate the Sacraments of Initiation.
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Ummm… many Catholics are resentful that they were Baptized and Confirmed without their consent. Though I am pro Infant Baptism. I just understand and appreciate Confirmation placed at the coming of age, and after the faith is expounded to them. Plus the reality of the Bishop being the normal ministerr of the Sacrament conveys the reality of the Bishop possessing his Apostolic succession and power of Laying on hands.
In my diocese, this would be a big, fat NO!
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Hmmm maybe so. I’d have to hear a Bishop express that myself, I think.
Apples & oranges. Children of Catholics are expected to be raised Catholic, that includes all the Sacraments of Initiation.
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Perhaps your right. Still, Confirmation is done while the candidate is still a child. Just at the very end of childhood, with as much of a development of reason and maturity possible. Not because it’s necessary, but because its fitting.
 
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Ammi said:
Perhaps your right. Still, Confirmation is done while the candidate is still a child. Just at the very end of childhood, with as much of a development of reason and maturity possible. Not because it’s necessary, but because its fitting.
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You may find this article informative:


As the Catechism says, “Although confirmation is sometimes called the ‘sacrament of Christian maturity,’ we must not confuse adult faith with the adult age of natural growth, nor forget that the baptismal grace is a grace of free, unmerited election and does not need ‘ratification’ to become effective.”
 
Yes, that’s all fine. If the Church makes these changes, I wouldnt mind. Yet, I understand and appreciate the practice as it is, also.

And I did not mean physical maturity, but maturity of reason, which can assist the will with educational understanding.

Baptism and Eucharist offer grace sufficient for preparation for Confirmation to be both anticipated and willfully received.

CCC:
1231 Where infant Baptism has become the form in which this sacrament is usually celebrated, it has become a single act encapsulating the preparatory stages of Christian initiation in a very abridged way. By its very nature infant Baptism requires a post-baptismal catechumenate. Not only is there a need for instruction after Baptism, but also for the necessary flowering of baptismal grace in personal growth. The catechism has its proper place here.

I think the present order is intended to span the life of childhood. And place a seal at the end of childhood, issuing in the age of adulthood. I find that practical and appropriate.

In any case, how is this debate relative to the young OP?

And @Dandelion52737, do you feel that this debate they are presenting is relative to your concerns?
 
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