Cell Phone Etiquette

[SwizzleStick]

True, but it has also made being far from home and loved ones a lot easier.

I am able to pray for the grandchild being rushed to the doctor with a suspected fractured collar bone; or the daughter experiencing an allergic reaction to penicillin; or the son-in-law on an emergency 3 hour trip, hoping to see his dying father (and the dying father); and many other ‘emergency’ situations that have arisen over the past six years…not to mention all the daily happy contact we are able to have.

I guess I don’t really like cell phones because they seem to generally have increased rudeness in folks and for some, real people and interacting face to face has been replaced with texting and interacting with a device instead. I suppose cell phones have some usefulness, though, as indicated by your post.

 

[VeritasLuxMea]

You know what I find interesting… it’s not even just about age. I’m now seeing older people being just as rude if not more so than younger folks who grew up with cells.

My mother, for example, drives me nuts with this… we’ll be out at a public restaurant with the family and she will not silence her phone. If the phone rings, she will answer it right at the table, doesn’t matter who is calling…

Or sometimes the family will be watching a sports game on TV or something and she’ll just sit right where she is chatting on the phone, no regard for the fact that the rest of us are watching it, so we have to mute the game and listen to her one-sided conversation.

I don’t work in retail, but people who use their phones while shopping aggravate me on behalf of all those who do. Specifically, people will be talking on their phones while a cashier is trying to talk to them… that is SO RUDE!

 

[coachdennis]

But some of us don’t think we should have to give up that knowledge. Why, if we have a cell phone and someone has the ability to call us?

That is what I was thinking. Years ago, when my grandmother was dying, we traveled about 350 miles to see her. We found out when we got there, that she had died just after we left.

When my father was dying, the hospital had my cell phone. Now he lived close, but I got updates all of the time. And I was able to be with him for his last hours here on earth.

When my nephew broke his arm, I was aware. When my niece landed at the airport and was on her way to my house, I got a call. When my son got dropped of at our house and made it safely inside, I knew.

Yes, cell phones can be a distraction but that doesn’t mean we should turn them off and throw them in a drawer.

You are mentioning all logical places and situations where cell phones are appropriate. And I agree with you.

What disturbs people is when you are with some people and the phone is constantly going off and they are answering and you can tell the phone calls are nothing more than someone saying “hi”.

I still stand my original statement – unless it is an emergency, the people in the room take priority over the incoming phone call.

And for not knowing if it is an “emergency” – a REAL emergency, not a manufactured one by drama queens – how many do we REALLY get on a day to day basis?

 

[EasterJoy]

I think there are two principles of etiquette about use of electronics when you have a date with a real person or persons.

One is that if the communication can wait, you let it wait. If you do have to check your cell phone every two minutes then, just as if it were 50 years ago and you had some need to check your watch every two minutes, you explain why, and you apologize for the nuisance this unfortunate necessity is causing to your real-time companion.

The second thing is that if you do have to send a text, then as much as possible, you let people know who you are communicating with, what the issue is, and why it can’t wait. You keep it short. Imagine what you’d do if you were having a meal with someone and another person approached the table to communicate something with you–about that much.

Finally, I would hope that while people might text a few snatches of urgent conversation in a restaurant if it is necessary, that they still do not ever have cell phone conversations there. That is just rude to the other diners, and to the establishment.

 

[HeatherWB]

I don’t work in retail, but people who use their phones while shopping aggravate me on behalf of all those who do. Specifically, people will be talking on their phones while a cashier is trying to talk to them… that is SO RUDE!

I work at a public library and I run into this quite a bit. It is so annoying!

I only give out my cell # on a need-to-know basis, so not that many people have it. If they do call, it’s for an awfully good reason.

While my cell phone goes with me most places, I generally don’t turn it on unless I want to use it or I’m expecting an important call. Hubs gets irritated with me for not having it on all the time, but I consider it to be there more for my convenience than others’ convenience.

What really irritates me is when the hubs picks up his cell to call somebody just to chat while we’re waiting for food at a restaurant. Never mind that I’m sitting there in front of him. Usually, I’ll have knitting with me that I’ll work on or I’ll whip out my phone and start web surfing.

 

[coachdennis]

I work at a public library and I run into this quite a bit. It is so annoying!

I only give out my cell # on a need-to-know basis, so not that many people have it. If they do call, it’s for an awfully good reason.

While my cell phone goes with me most places, I generally don’t turn it on unless I want to use it or I’m expecting an important call. Hubs gets irritated with me for not having it on all the time, but I consider it to be there more for my convenience than others’ convenience.

What really irritates me is when the hubs picks up his cell to call somebody just to chat while we’re waiting for food at a restaurant. Never mind that I’m sitting there in front of him. Usually, I’ll have knitting with me that I’ll work on or I’ll whip out my phone and start web surfing.

By doing this you are simply reinforcing his behavior as appropriate.

Next time hubby does that, announce to him that you are going to the bar or to restroom, or to the car to wait until he is done making phone calls – THEN GET UP AND LEAVE!

He’ll learn his behavior is not acceptable to you

 

[TheRealJuliane]

By doing this you are simply reinforcing his behavior as appropriate.

Next time hubby does that, announce to him that you are going to the bar or to restroom, or to the car to wait until he is done making phone calls – THEN GET UP AND LEAVE!

He’ll learn his behavior is not acceptable to you

It’s WAY more fun to reach out, grab the phone off his ear and throw it across the restaurant.

If my husband were to do such a thing to me…:nunchuk::blackeye::stretcher:

 

[coachdennis]

It’s WAY more fun to reach out, grab the phone off his ear and throw it across the restaurant.

If my husband were to do such a thing to me…:nunchuk::blackeye::stretcher:

Julianne, that’s why I love ya! :tiphat:

 

[Anglewannabe]

So from what I gather, cell phones are just another one of those things were people are divided as to what is acceptable and what is not and can easily become a heated debate. People who use them in public have their valid arguments as to why and will be adamant they are doing nothing wrong. And people who find them rude won’t budge either.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

So from what I gather, cell phones are just another one of those things were people are divided as to what is acceptable and what is not and can easily become a heated debate. People who use them in public have their valid arguments as to why and will be adamant they are doing nothing wrong. And people who find them rude won’t budge either.

Well I would still like to hear how people justify continuing to talk on their cell phones when a salesperson is speaking to them at the same time. Or how someone can answer his cell phone IN CHURCH and talk as he is going outside…

 

[PatriceA]

Well I would still like to hear how people justify continuing to talk on their cell phones when a salesperson is speaking to them at the same time. Or how someone can answer his cell phone IN CHURCH and talk as he is going outside…

Example for Mass: family member in the hospital, in the ICU and the only time we left the beside of the loved one was to attend Mass. The Hospital had our cell number and they called in the middle of Mass to inform us things had taken a turn and the loved one was being rushed back into surgery.

Life happens, and cell phones can be a tool OR they can be toy. Really depends upon the manners of the cell phone user and the reason for the calls.

 

[TheRealJuliane]

Example for Mass: family member in the hospital, in the ICU and the only time we left the beside of the loved one was to attend Mass. The Hospital had our cell number and they called in the middle of Mass to inform us things had taken a turn and the loved one was being rushed back into surgery.

Life happens, and cell phones can be a tool OR they can be toy. Really depends upon the manners of the cell phone user and the reason for the calls.

But did you ANSWER the phone INSIDE the sanctuary? During Mass?? This was not an emergency, as the man didn’t rush outside but started talking at full voice and walked to the back of the church.

 

[PatriceA]

But did you ANSWER the phone INSIDE the sanctuary? During Mass?? This was not an emergency, as the man didn’t rush outside but started talking at full voice and walked to the back of the church.

Yes I did.

 

[HeatherWB]

I love your responses to my husband! Perhaps I might have to try one or more of them next time he pulls that stunt. insert evil grin

One thing I will give the hubs credit for in relation to his cell phone is that he will make it a point to turn it off or put it on vibrate before church. He does have the type of job where he is “on call” periodically and needs to leave it on all the time, but that’s what vibrate is for!

Cell phones going off in church just annoy the **** out of me and disturb the atmosphere of worship.

 

[HeatherWB]

I love your responses to my husband! Perhaps I might have to try one or more of them next time he pulls that stunt. insert evil grin

One thing I will give the hubs credit for in relation to his cell phone is that he will make it a point to turn it off or put it on vibrate before church. He does have the type of job where he is “on call” periodically and needs to leave it on all the time, but that’s what vibrate is for!

Cell phones going off in church just annoy the **** out of me and disturb the atmosphere of worship.

 

[EasterJoy]

So from what I gather, cell phones are just another one of those things were people are divided as to what is acceptable and what is not and can easily become a heated debate. People who use them in public have their valid arguments as to why and will be adamant they are doing nothing wrong. And people who find them rude won’t budge either.

No, it’s pretty much a divide between the people using the cells phones at the time and the people they are ignoring (or worse yet, yelling past as if they were not there) in order to do it.

Oh, and my other pet peeve is people wandering around stores yelling into their hands-free devices. Someone hearing voices could wander through a store having a heated conversation with the voices in their head, and no one would blink an eye. Sometimes they are saying rude things to the person on the other end of the phone, but since the person isn’t there, you first think that they’re directing this at you. The worst I’ve ever seen was someone doing this to a cashier who had just asked a totally reasonable question while ringing them up. Everyone in line was shocked, then they realized that this woman was chewing out her husband over the phone. We got to listen to that, and THEN when she was done, she told us all why she was right and he was wrong and how frustrating he was. Not a word of apology. The least you can do is to conduct yourself as if both parties to your little drama were acting it out in front of whomever is present on either end. Keep your voices down, please, keep the call short, and above all keep it civilized and fit for public consumption. More to the point, do not interrupt one conversation in order to carry on a second one without offering apologies to the first party you were conversing with!

No, not everyone using them in public does it in the same way, and certainly not all of them have a valid argument. Some of them are just totally self-absorbed and clueless about how annoying they are being to everyone stuck shopping with them in the same stores or eating with them in the same restaurants.

I’ve been in restaurants with people who are literally answering calls from ambulances who need their medical advice about patients being rushed to the hospital. The recipients of these conversations of literally live-and-death importance make a sign of apology, excuse themselves from the table, and leave the dining room until they are finished. (Oh, and somehow they figure out how to put their phones on vibrate when they’re in a restaurant or church or concert, so that they don’t interrupt what everyone else has assembled to do!!)

 

[SciFiWriter]

A friend of mine came up with a wonderful idea for dinner dates. When going out to eat, everyone puts their phone, face down in the center of the table, stacked… First person to check their phone, pays.

But seriously, I totally agree with most people. The cell phone has taken away emotional communication and replaced it largely with digital communication. It is a responsibility to learn the line between the two and regulate it so that people are not ignored and the satisfaction and meaningful experience of a night out is fully enjoyed.

 

[maryjk]

A friend of mine came up with a wonderful idea for dinner dates. When going out to eat, everyone puts their phone, face down in the center of the table, stacked… First person to check their phone, pays.

None of my friends would agree to that, nor would I.

We are all married with children. We have been out to dinner and have received calls where our friend has had to leave.

 

[PatriceA]

None of my friends would agree to that, nor would I.

We are all married with children. We have been out to dinner and have received calls where our friend has had to leave.

Exactly. My phone is on the table, screen up, whenever the daughter is not with us.

 

[EasterJoy]

None of my friends would agree to that, nor would I.

We are all married with children. We have been out to dinner and have received calls where our friend has had to leave.

Does the same thing apply at work? I mean, if you get that same call at work, do you say goodbye to your co-workers and rush out on such short notice? Do you constantly check your cell phones when you are with clients? Why are your children getting the “golden hour” treatment? (I mean the time frame in which brain damage occurs if a health issue restricts blood flow to the brain.) Do none of us remember how few lives were lost when our parents used to go out for dinner and we couldn’t reach them until *they *checked in on us?

Again–I know people who work in emergency medicine. Lives are on the line when they get a call. If it is not literally (and I do mean literally) a call about a patient whose life or health depends on an immediate reply, it waits.