Charity and homosexual approaches

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strngrnrth

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When I have been the object of homosexual advances, I have always tried to respond with gentleness and charity, to avoid giving the impression I was angry or planning to out anyone. This doesn’t always get the message across, though. Since I dress down partially to avoid advances from men, my appearance could give the impression I am open to advances from women. There are a lot of homosexuals where I live, male and female, because it’s an extremely liberal part of the world. I know alot of them and I did a little experimenting long ago, which makes it more ambiguous. Straight men often say that if that happened to them, they would react with threats and violence to be as clear as possible. I certainly don’t want to do that. I want to be charitable and retain my friendships with these women in order to be a good witness to them. Does anyone have any tips?
 
A smile and “I’m not interested, I’m straight and would like to be your friend” should suffice.
 
That’s the most obvious thing to do, but I have a lot of anxiety about not being believed because of my past.
 
What’s the problem with not being believed? If you aren’t interested, you aren’t interested - there’s not much more to get across. 🤷
 
Just as a point of reference: for my part, I never have PLANNED to reciprocate with violence or anger when approached by a homosexual.

It has just been an intense, visceral reaction. I get immediate anger. For me, such an approach is an immense offense. On many levels.

I’m male, by the way; assuming the OP is female.
 
get over anxiety about other people’s feelings and reserve your anxiety for your own spiritual condition.
merely say, I have made a commitment to chastity and I am not interested in that type of relationship, I prefer to concentrate on developing real friendships. If someone persists, explain that you consider that persistance to border on harrassment and stalking.
 
Sexual advances are demeaning and need to be loudly and roundly shut down. If you are a woman and ever had a man hounding you, you know what it’s like. Same with man on man. As the Church teaches, “The deliberate use of the sexual faculty, for whatever reason, outside of marriage is essentially contrary to its purpose.” See, when you gently decline and the other continues, it’s evidence that the person regards you as a thing, a means to an end, rather than a human. Don’t tolerate it for a second. You don’t have to threaten violence, but you can raise your voice so that everyone can hear. When you shine light like this, people with evil designs skulk back to the shadows.
 
why would you feel more compunction about turning down a homosexual advance than turning down someone of the opposite sex who comes on to you. that is unacceptable in any context and never has to be tolerated, in the name of “feelings”, charity or PC ness
 
Is, “no offense, but you touch me and you’ll pull back a bloody stump.” too harsh? 😃 As a guy, the whole idea is so gross that it would be like someone offering me rotten road kill for lunch. But, I know that an angry, judgmental response is wrong. However, any sexual advance is an invitation to mortal sin. Treat it as such. You don’t have to direct it at the person, but don’t be so concerned about offending someone. If we live the Gospel, we are going to offend people, no matter how nice we are. For any sexual advance, whether man or woman, simply tell them that you’re a Christian and you’re not interested, but if they’d like to talk about your faith, you’d love to share it with them. That would probably take care of it.
 
For me, I’m FLATTERED when a woman indicates she’s sexually interested. It means at least on the physical level that I’m attractive.

I suppose because I’m male I just don’t feel the physical fear concern.

Don’t mean to hijack the thread, staying on track, I would say the best thing with the homosexual approach is to (a) just grit your teeth and bear it, say some words that you’d rather not do that, and (b) remember that you would get in trouble with the law if you took action.
 
If this is such a big problem, I would evaluate where I was hanging out and perhaps avoid those areas.

Paul
 
Don’t’ fight violence with violence or hate with hate. That is always good advise. You are doing the right thing to be nice and charitable about it. I agree with one of the other replies to evaluate where you are hanging out and try to avoid those places. Gay & Lesbian Bars etc…

Try this as well, wear religious T-Shirts like “GOT JESUS” or something that is very noticeable. It keeps those that are truly out to hurt you away, and also opens up conversations that can lead to Evangelism so you can lead them to Jesus.

God Bless everything you do in the name of Jesus
 
I used to waitress at Denny’s… for some reason they have the reputation for employing gays and lesbians. We had an unwritten policy on the night shift that was ask me once, I will politely let you know I am straight, but ask me again and all bets are off because you aren’t respecting my choices. Occasionally we had some young men that did get offended on the first occasion, but because it was such a diverse group, we usually got them going with the program.

Another thing you can do is dress feminine but modest…
wear a crucifix… it might make them think about it a little bit…
or if you feel that “vibe” of them about to ask you out… start talking about a boyfriend or admire a male figure nearby…
 
Just say your straight. If they persist then they aint even accepted by other gay people. Know this first hand.
 
forgiveall said:
Don’t’ fight violence with violence or hate with hate. That is always good advise. You are doing the right thing to be nice and charitable about it. I agree with one of the other replies to evaluate where you are hanging out and try to avoid those places. Gay & Lesbian Bars etc…

Try this as well, wear religious T-Shirts like “GOT JESUS” or something that is very noticeable. It keeps those that are truly out to hurt you away, and also opens up conversations that can lead to Evangelism so you can lead them to Jesus.

God Bless everything you do in the name of Jesus
Click to expand...
I think I’m going with this one.👍
 
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