Chaste since the end of August!

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tabsie3210

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My life is wonderful.

I’m writing, I’m getting over my bitter disappointment that Obama won and am intrigued and pleased to note that we have a president elect who’s not pale complected (although I’m not happy with his abortion and euthanasia and cloning beliefs), and I’ve been able to keep myself chaste for over two months now! I’m still struggling, but I’m pleased that I pulled it off as long as I have.

No porn! None at all! No mastrubation, no reading erotica, I have given up all slash (homoerotic fan fiction), I’ve been praying more (though I’m still not at the point where I"m saying the Rosery every day like I want to be, but I’m not going to confuse disappointment with disaster, and I’m going to keep working on that). I’m pleased that things are going so well, and I just wanted to share my happiness with the web forum because I feel very comfortable and safe here. I know I’ve been a lurker for a while now, but I have been catching up on my reading of THIS ROCK, and I love it!

It’s been both easier and harder than I ever thought to get myself under some kind of control. God knows I struggle and He’s been very patient with me. I hope to continue to please Him.

It’s been easier, because as I go through a day I realize my body doesn’t have control over me, I have control over it. And harder, because control means not being lazy.

I found a scapular with my old Rosery that my grandmother got for me when I was a baby. I asked my priest about it; Father says that you wear it so the felt touches the skin. It’s lovely, and while I’m not 100% sure what the proper form is for wearing it (am I supposed to pray before putting it on?) I’m thrilled I have it and love knowing that 1) God loves me, and 2) my Grandmother, whose name I remembered on All Souls Day, loved me enough to get it for me. I also love that I have a Mother in Heaven to comfort me, and a Father to laugh at my quirks and get me under control when I can’t do it myself.

I’ve been thinking about the Holy Spirit. I know the Father, and I know the Son. I think the Holy Spirit is a different type of person, very personal and very determined. I think He’s the one who reminds me the most of Hell and reminds me why I want to please God so much - to be able to look upon His face when I die.

Blah, I talk too much. I’m just so very happy that I’ve been able to be in control of myself, and I hope that I please God. And thank you, everybody on the forum, for being open and interesting and honest. You do inspire me, and I think that y’all are sweet. I may not agree with everyone about different ideas, but I like that everyone is open about what he feels. 🙂
 
Good for you on the self control! Also, I know how you feel about the Grandma stuff, mine gave me her prized silver and turquoise bracelet before she died and I’ve never taken it off - in her tradition, she wore it for 50+ years before giving it to me. It’s my lifeline to her.
 
Never ever forget that your self control is only possible because of God’s grace working within you. However you have managed to stay “clean” keep at it!

I too have been clean for about three months. There have been several shorter “clean” periods in the recent past that ended in falls, perhaps because I became proud of myself and failed to recognize God’s grace being responsible for my success. I won’t make that mistake again. Also, I am forever committed to staying in a state of grace.

I have developed a brutal and bitter hatred toward this particular sin because of what it has done to the innocence I once enjoyed as a child. Praise God for his Grace and pray for our continued success!
 
Good job Tabsie! keep it up! i 'm currently trying to do what you are trying to also. what ido is keep my self chaste for 4 days, then after that 5 days, and keep trying to break that record.
 
TLM08 -

I can’t remember if I read this or heard it somewhere (probably read it, but I can’t recall where, darn!), but someone once described Grace as being like Power Steering - I’m responsible for where I want to move the car, but Grace is what I have to make that movement easier. Likewise, I’m responsible for my behavior, but Grace is what keeps me on the straight and narrow, without having to struggle as much.

I’m a lot happier believing that God expects us to apologize if we screw up and then pay it back. The OSAS thinking doesn’t always feel fair to me, and I’m glad that when I do something bad, God gives me all the help I need to get back to good. That’s why I liked seeing you post that, about remembering that grace is what’s keeping me going - because it’s good not to get a big head.👍
 
tabsie3210 said:
I have given up all slash (homoerotic fan fiction)
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I wouldn’t be surprised if I was the only one who knows what that is. Yaoi is a big thing in my generation, especially with anime nerds like me.
 
tabsie3210 said:
TLM08 -

I can’t remember if I read this or heard it somewhere (probably read it, but I can’t recall where, darn!), but someone once described Grace as being like Power Steering - I’m responsible for where I want to move the car, but Grace is what I have to make that movement easier. Likewise, I’m responsible for my behavior, but Grace is what keeps me on the straight and narrow, without having to struggle as much.

I’m a lot happier believing that God expects us to apologize if we screw up and then pay it back. The OSAS thinking doesn’t always feel fair to me, and I’m glad that when I do something bad, God gives me all the help I need to get back to good. That’s why I liked seeing you post that, about remembering that grace is what’s keeping me going - because it’s good not to get a big head.👍
Click to expand...
I just learned about Mortal Sins this week and i’m still shaken up by it. I’m not afraid than any sin, even the ones I don’t remember, might damn me for all eternity. Though it is logical like in any relationship to have faithfulness on both sides. And I’m also afraid of other things about salvation that I have missed.
 
CL,
Don’t be afraid. Seek the Lord through the sacraments and His church and you need not fear. Jesus is not trying to get us to slip up and miss eternity with Him. What he does wish for us to know, is that if we choose and understand that something is a serious sin and still choose to commit the sin, then we have separated ourselves form His grace which continues to lead to us to our sanctification.
The Sacrament of Penance is available to us, so we must not fear. Peace and may God bless you on your journey.

Stan
 
Hey Tabsie!
Great for you!
Self-control is something that I have been struggling a lot with lately (“lately” is actually an understatement). I was wondering if you, or anybody else, has any advice. I pray for God’s grace to help me, but it seems that it isn’t to be found when I need it most. I just keep stumbling right back into old habits. Again, any advice, prayers, fasts, etc. that you found helpful would be nice. Thanks!
 
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